Colleague

[sparklestarry]

In the grand scheme of life this is quite minor but it’s grating on me and I need to rant.

So I’ve just returned to work after 1 year mat leave on statutory pay. It wasn’t the plan to take the full year as my pay is dreadful but my baby is premature and we are now getting help for her slow development. I’ve only worked 12 days so far! My job is full time includes 2 Saturdays per month (not part of my salary but paid separately) however in the interview I did say my husband works shifts and I will work whatever Saturdays I can but it may be tricky. Before I went on mat leave I almost always, bar a couple of times, put in those 2 days each month. So now restrictions have lifted immediate family from across the border want to visit and see the baby in 2 months time so I emailed other colleagues explaining my situation and said if there were cover that’s great if not I’ll of course work it, it would just be nice for them if I’m there. Colleague who thinks she’s my boss (I think she genuinely does but I’ve been told otherwise several times by actual boss who I never see) basically emailed a narky response saying that they assumed I would be going back to 2 Saturdays per month because they tend to work late (sometimes there’s out of hours appointments but rarely) as for working late it’s their own choice no one is forcing them to and it will be unpaid. I was told From now on we need you to do the 2 days per month. I responded saying that’s fine because I did actually say if there’s no takers I would still work it. I’m just asking because sometimes people have special events or holidays that I would help out with if I can. Another couple of emails went back and forth saying she thought I wasn’t available much because of DHs hours etc, that’s she’s really tired and thought she would get some rest now I’m back, but it ended in her sending very happy email probably because she got her way.
It’s hard slotting back into work, it used to be just the 2 of us but upon my return there’s another 2 staff members now in helping her every day plus me. So she has plenty of support now. I’m sick of her throwing her weight around but unfortunately the big bosses always side with her because she works 24/7 and therefore brings in the money. I know this is minor compared to other folks problems but thoughts?

I guess your colleague has probably had to pick up extra work/ weekend shifts whilst you've been off and this has pissed her off.

It also sounds like with your husband working long shifts and you having to work six days a week twice a month, this is possibly just going to be too much with a toddler and a baby who may need extra care ? It sounds a lot to be juggling.

@Butchyrestingface no this the only weekend they can come.

It's extraordinary she's been telling me she doesn't want to work Saturdays and she needs a break then she goes into work on her day off on a Saturday....🤦🏽‍♀️

@Babyroobs

It also sounds like with your husband working long shifts and you having to work six days a week twice a month, this is possibly just going to be too much with a toddler and a baby who may need extra care ? It sounds a lot to be juggling.

I don't think so. She has more help now so she doesn't have to put in the hours. She now has an assistant and another person in the office sharing the load. She just lives to work and can't stop. I had a contractor on the phone who started the conversation with em I had an email from her at 6pm on Sunday? Says it all.

@Babyroobs

It also sounds like with your husband working long shifts and you having to work six days a week twice a month, this is possibly just going to be too much with a toddler and a baby who may need extra care ? It sounds a lot to be juggling.

Yes it is hard. I do my best to do my fair share at work and have a balanced family life too. It's not easy but I do what I have to to get by at the moment. Need a lotto win hahaha! X

@squiglet111

Why can't your family visit a weekend you aren't working?

This!

Hold up, colleague said saturdays would be unpaid? Why would you work for no pay? And I’d be doing a reply all to say ‘But you’re not my boss, so you don’t get to decide’, possibly slightly more politely.

None of this really makes much sense.

But why can't your family make arrangements for when you're actually available if it's so important they come?

Most people have been cut off from family so you're certainly not unique or special in that regard.

And as far as your colleagues are concerned you have been on leave for a year, irrespective of the reason for it. So to come back and immediately try to get out of work commitments is never going to come across as anything other than a piss take really.

@Bourbonic

It's to do with a weekend when almost everyone involved is free

I absolutely do not think I'm unique or special or that I've had it harder. Very rude. At no point in my OP did I imply that. I posted for perspective over her reaction because actually I do care and I care about the impact my action has on others. If I didn't care I wouldnt post. I was putting the feelers out to see if it was possible or not, I said if not that of course I would work. I don't claim to be perfect.... sometimes we get it wrong and I wondered if I had hence the whole purpose of my post. But at the end of the day if you don't ask you don't get and after all I'm due holidays like everyone else and I have the right to ask. It's not like the company have been generous, I've just returned and had no pay for all of 2021. I don't take the piss. By rights I'm due holidays, does this mean I'm taking the piss when I decide to book them too? I should be allowed to make these requests just like any other person returning for mat leave or any other sort of leave.

On a side note, said colleague works 24/7 out of her own choice. She said to me yesterday that she's tired and doesn't want to work Saturdays and wants to spend more time with her family. I completely understand that. But then today I walked past the office and there she was, working on her day off when she's not needed, not spending time with her family at all