AIBU to move DS into the living room?

[legofootcasualty]

I currently live in a one-bed flat - I sleep in the living room and 3yo DS is normally in the bedroom - but during lockdown we've gotten into the habit of him sleeping with me in my bed in the living room.

New baby is coming in August, and due to needing a quiet dark place for DC2 to nap and sleep, I'm considering moving my bed and the cot into the bedroom, and moving DS' bed into the living room.

He's already sleeping in the living room and a very good sleeper anyway but I'm feeling very guilty at the thought of moving his bed into the living room - so he technically doesn't have a bedroom (even though he's not using it now anyway - he plays and sleeps in the living room and the bedroom is just where we keep our clothes).

What do you think? WIBU?

What size are the beds? Just stick the cot in the bedroom and leave everything the same? Do you think DS will still sleep with you in your bed if your bed was in the bedroom?

To me it would seem sensible that you use the bedroom for all 3 of you but obviously that depends on space, whether the baby would disturb him or not etc

Any solution which works for the 3 of you is reasonable.

@Apileofballyhoo as I'll be doing night feeds my bed will need to be in the same place as the cot.

At that point DS will have to be back in his own bed (planning on starting this transition soon) and sleep in a different room to us.

As there are only two rooms, it would either be me and baby in living room and DS in bedroom, or the opposite. And I wouldn't be able to keep the living room dark and quiet for naps, bedtime etc so right now it seems like bedroom is the only option.

@Porcupineintherough there would probably be just enough space for all 3 of us in the bedroom but I don't want to disturb DS' sleep with a baby up crying all night

I would put both in the bedroom. He's 3, he can stay with you during baby's naps, and get his room back when the baby is up. It's not too early to learn to share a bedroom.

At night YOU sleep in the living room with the baby.

Yes it's a great idea. That way, your ds can relax and play normally in the living room without disturbing the baby when they nap/sleep.

I'd make sure to let him pick out some new bedding etc and big up the idea. As he may get a little jealous of you been with baby and not him. Starting the transition soon sounds like a good idea, before baby arrives.

Depends on the layout of the flat but if you have to go into the living room to get from the bedroom to the kitchen and/or bathroom and your toddler goes to bed early then it doesn’t seem very practical to have them in the living room. Small babies are usually better at sleeping anywhere than toddlers and most people have baby in the living room regardless of how big their house is until they themselves go to bed due to safe sleep advice. I’d personally put the 3YO in the bedroom and you and baby in the living room with the eventual plan being for the kids to share the bedroom as soon as baby is sleeping through.

Where is the cot now? A Moses basket type thing is easy to move from the bedroom to living room for naps and night time and should be big enough for baby until 6 months or so iirc. That's what we did in the early stages, baby just napped where I was and I'd move the basket to the bedroom at night. Not that he slept much day or night in any case.

Presumably the living room is separate to the kitchen and you have a dining table in the kitchen, and don’t need to go through the living room to get to any other rooms?

@SimonedeBeauvoirscat All the rooms are separate - living room is first, then the kitchen, then the bathroom, and then the bedroom, with a hallway in between that the front door opens into - so none of the rooms are connected.

You could do temp and then move both children into the bedroom later on or do you plan to move
Is there no way all 3 if you can be in bedroom ? Does your ds not go to bed before you ?
Also do you have a partner that stays or visits
Personally I would want dc to have bedroom so he can go to bed before me and isn't kept up late

I agree with @motherloaded. Both kids start off in the bedroom, then you take baby back out into the living room with you when you go to sleep.

If you have a moses basket or easily moveable crib, I'd go for keeping baby in the living room with you overnight as that will make it easier for night feeds and waking etc. In your DS bedroom, keep a dedicated spot free for moving the crib to for day time naps if needed. Over time then your DS can get used to the idea that he will share the room with his sibling once they grow bigger.