My boy is in the hospital because of his broken leg, my girl self-harmed, what do you advise me to do during these difficult periods? Or just emotional support!

[deafsymphony]

My boy fell down on the stairs and he broken his leg, and when my daughter wanted to help him medium of the stairs while he fell down constantly, she rolled down on stairs as she took his hand and my son yanked once her. It was a terrible accident: an extreme example of a frontal physical collision. I am deaf, and when I could see them, I thought they were dead and tears flooded my face. I called the ambulance in a hurry, the sign language interpreter helped me, who is a housekeeper too in our house. It was horrible. After that, my daughter started to serious self-harm because she has Borderline Personality Disorder and blames herself for what happened. Should I put my daughter in inpatient psychiatric care, until she gets better well-being and good treatment and psychological caring after these horrible events? Or can I soothe her? I want to help her, but helplessness almost grinds my nerves. And about my son. My son is still being examined by doctors, but the first results are encouraging: I was notified by e-mail because a visit to the hospital is not possible. Oh, my son! I am really afraid. I'm sure I feel not good. As a deaf person, moreover as mother with two children, it is difficult to communicate, it is difficult to definite and understand and know what I can feel and what I cannot and/or what I should or what I shouldn't, because there is little and poor opportunity for interaction and less emotional support, because acquiring physical assistive devices, assets and tools, participating in hearing tests takes time away, distracted from nurturing and / or creating a person's good, quality social relationships. Is it good if I think it is painful and difficult what has happened and is happening? There are questions in my mind that I can only articulate in sign language, which makes a very limited, isolated life available to me, and self-loathing and self-hatred is overwhelming in me for this, and also for my acquired deafness: will the children be well? Won't my son's leg fracture be more severe? ...?Etc...?

And if you can’t give advice, please help my difficult journey through deafness-motherhood continuum with your emotional presence. Thank you.

Postscript: I live in an area that is the focal point of Coronavirus infection, severely, making it even more difficult for my life.

How old is your daughter? She should be involved in the decision making. You've got to guard against her thinking being put into a care situation is you not wanting her because you blame her. Sometimes it's easier to communicate extreme feelings via messages, would that work?

With your son's leg, you'll just have to let the doctors do their thing and try not to worry.

How old is your son? Maybe I'm I've missed something but while I can understand your initial panic and I'm not trying to downplay anything here, but it is "just" a broken leg, and surely not something that serious that a hospital trip and doctor won't fix? People break arms and legs all the times, it's not uncommon.

I don't have any experience with deafness and sign language, but could you type out what you want to say on a computer like you've done here, or on a text message if you have your phone with you at the place you want to express your thoughts?

When did this event take place and has your daughter self harmed before? If this is an ongoing thing, professional care might be best

How old are the children?
And how long ago did the incident happen?

Broken legs are very common and heal absolutely fine.

Your daughter- is this the first time she has self harmed?

How old are the dc in question?

Unless the self-harm is unusually severe (and life threatening) she is unlikely to reach the bar for a hospital admission. I'm going to assume your dd is 18 or over if she has a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (as that diagnosis can't be given to children) so I think you need to talk to her directly and encourage her to speak to her GP and request a referral for further support.

I'm the child of a deaf adult. None of my injuries/illnesses have been made any worse by having a deaf parent.

I don't feel that having a deaf parent has caused me any disadvantages in life. Yes, it made things like Parents Evening a little bit more challenging, and when I was in A and E as a child, they had to find a translator for my dad, as I couldn't sign for him. He was a great parent, and is a brilliant grandfather to my niece and nephew who are learning to sign. Interestingly, my brother and I both find learning languages easy, because we were exposed to two languages from birth.

I'm deaf with 2 DC now grown up. I don't sign but I speak and read lips.

It hasn't affected being a parent at all.

You didn't say how old they are.

This was just a horrible accident and nobody is to blame for it. If you look up online, statistics say accidents in the home are very common. Slips, and falls. burns.

Your DSs leg will heal up. I'm sure you've read stories about auto accidents were many bones were broken and then a year later they are back to normal.

Is your DD Borderline currently being treated?

I often use a mini whiteboard while out as it's exhausting trying to read lips. I'll write or draw on it plus facial and body language counts too.

Hope your DC will be OK.