To feel so unsettled in new house?

[Battybonkers]

Hi,
We moved in around 3 months ago. The selling/buying process was super stressful and I thought once we were in it’d be a relief but it’s been awful. The house needs some work and I’ve convinced myself we’ve bitten off more than we can chew. I’ve also convinced myself that we’ve overpaid and bought a lemon (Theres no evidence really backing this up). I’m obsessing over cracks (had a full structural and surveyor said cracks were fine). I can’t settle at all and hate the house even though on paper it’s fine. I’ve lost weight, get nauseous and dizzy. I know this isn’t normal and have referred myself for mental health support: I scored quite high on the anxiety assessment. Has anyone else had this? Anxiety triggered by a house move? If so how did it pan out for you?

Found an old thread on here from 2016 from someone saying similar things - shame there is no update. 🤞🏻 It worked out for her

Me!

House was a dooey uppy (a tip needing new electrics, central heating, bathrooms, kitchen, plumbing, decorating) and I felt overwhelmed and tired. I worried over the state of it and would it ever be finished.

I love my house. Took awhile but we made it ours.

Can you decorate one room the same as the previous house, so it feels more familiar? We did that, and it helped it feel more like home?

Nauseous and dizzy.... have you got a carbon monoxide alarm?!

I'm sorry you feel this way.
We lived in a place for three years and I never felt comfortable there. Eventually moved home to live abroad with dh's job and then ended up selling it!
I hope that you will settle in yours. Sometimes it takes a while to make it yours.
I love my current home. It's great but it also needed work and that is daunting at times.
I think they you need a few months sometimes to let the dust settle and just get used to something new.

Thanks @RedFrogsRule that is really reassuring to hear!

@Notlostjustexploring that is a really good idea. - maybe I should paint something! I was leaving decorating till last as so much other stuff needs doing first but maybe one room would help....

@Notlostjustexploring yes I have - GP has confirmed it’s physical symptoms of anxiety 😞 I feel carbon monoxide may be more straight forward to sort (but obviously a lot more deadly!!)

Sorry @Notlostjustexploring tagged thee wrong poster re carbon mo oxide!

Write a list of rooms and projects. Pick a few easy small ones and tackle them. I started in the garden because I could do that whilst waiting on plumbers, carpenters, tree surgeons and builders to contact me for quotes.

I kept a book (would use a spreadsheet now) to manage the budget, take note of quotes and enable planning.

Getting some organisation and also getting out and gardening was great for me. I was too tired at night to not sleep. The garden is an odd thing to start with but I could do that, physical exercise fab for anxiety, plants take ages to establish and I could amble around watching the progress and avoid the chaos that was happening indoors! Eventually plumbers finished, bathroom in, working shower, working heating... the big crack over the front window has been filled and painted several times. I don’t see it anymore.

@RedFrogsRule thanks so much - you’re really reassuring me: I feel like you are me a few years down the line! I have spreadsheets a plenty and they do help me feel a bit more in control of the uncontrollable! Have started doing some gardening too and funnily enough said to DH that maybe I should just focus on the garden at the mo as it feels manageable. Really reassured to hear that you stop noticing the cracks after a while. We have one that we repaired and the repair stands out a bit as it’s fresh render - my eyes are drawn to it every time I walk past it: maybe I’ll grow a clematis over it and can forget it’s there!