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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is my husband a self-important prick? (Slightly lighthearted...)

43 replies

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 30/04/2021 11:22

So for context we have both been working from home for more than a year. Similar level of seniority and salaries. I worked from home a lot before the pandemic, he didn't.

This morning I had put a wash on and asked him to put it out on the line when it was finished if he was free (he works downstairs, I'm upstairs). The response I get is 'you know I have a meeting every Friday at 9am.' Erm no I don't because I'm not your PA and even though you might have told me that information several times I don't retain it because I don't need to and quite frankly I don't care!

I think being in the same house 24/7 may be getting to us slightly...wish he would bugger off back to the office and take his very important job with him and leave me to WFH in peace!

OP posts:

motherloaded · 30/04/2021 14:29

VladmirsPoutine

because the OP's reaction, thread title and post seems completely over-the-top!

It's not normal to have so littler regard for your partner's job, regardless of who earns what.

Wheelerdeeler · 30/04/2021 14:30

When we were all at home , everyone knew I had a mtg Friday morning that I couldn't be interrupted. Because I told them every Friday. Several times.

No one knows my diary now. Why would they?

Original poster

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 30/04/2021 14:36

Oh dear I must have completely missed the point of an anonymous internet forum. I thought it was there to get things off your chest with like-minded women so that you don't smother your partner in his sleep through sheer frustration

OP posts:

UserAtRandom · 30/04/2021 14:37

After a year of working at home, I do know all my husband's regular meeting times. And who they are with and what they are about. There isn't an awful lot else going on.

motherloaded · 30/04/2021 14:38

chocolatesaltyballs22

technically, you asked if you were unreasonable.

My answer is yes.

But what you wanted was for people to agree with you?

Maybe you should consider go working in your office and leave your DH at home if it's so unpleasant?

MiddleParking · 30/04/2021 14:42

If an OP posted on here that she thought her husband should know and care about when her regular work meetings were she’d get absolutely pounded for being self obsessed and egotistical. Nailed on.

Vallmo47 · 30/04/2021 14:44

Wow, OP, bet you’re glad you posted in AIBU. 😂

Original poster

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 30/04/2021 14:47

@Valmo47 it eases the boredom between VERY IMPORTANT work meetings!

OP posts:

altlife · 30/04/2021 14:49

Oh god. My DH has been working from home since November ( I was wfh since March).

It's been lovely spending the time together (working in same room), gossiping about colleagues etc but I still found it was me doing the bits and bobs. Because apparently his job is 'different' and he can't spare 5mins to wash up, even though if he was in the office he'd have time to make tea and have a catch up with someone.

I'm REALLY ready for him to head back to the office. Unfortunately it won't be for some time yet and I'm not sure I won't murder him we'll both get through it alive.

motherloaded · 30/04/2021 14:53

@MiddleParking

If an OP posted on here that she thought her husband should know and care about when her regular work meetings were she’d get absolutely pounded for being self obsessed and egotistical. Nailed on.

more accurately, if an OP posted that her husband could't care less and didn't want to know about her schedule because he was too important, so she should be dealing with all the boring and petty stuff because her job didn't count...

MiddleParking · 30/04/2021 15:09

(Narrator voice): it was not more accurate

motherloaded · 30/04/2021 15:30

@MiddleParking

(Narrator voice): it was not more accurate

unless you actually read the OP..

and quite frankly I don't care!

we got that...

FFSFFSFFS · 30/04/2021 15:32

Why are you the one who has to ask him to help you with the laundry?

RainRainGoAway12 · 30/04/2021 15:54

Urgh! I get you OP. My husband has meeting after meeting at his Very Important Job and I don’t care about his schedule either. I’m a teacher and he wouldn’t know my timetable and nor would I expect him to. Doesn’t mean we don’t care about each other’s jobs. Just not the micro details.

He also seems to forget that as he’s working from home he hasn’t got an office cleaner which drives me mad. His office is where crumpled envelopes and coffee cups go to die. He’s also often Too Bloody Important to open the door for (his own) Amazon deliveries, empty the dishwasher, wash (his own) plate, put milk back in the fridge ... please let this pandemic be over soon. I need to release him back into civilisation!

Original poster

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 30/04/2021 16:26

I genuinely don't understand why I should care about his schedule, nor he about mine! We talk about stuff other than work. If something is important, (ie I have a big meeting tomorrow at x time so if you could not disturb me please that would be good), but I don't have his regular meetings tatooed on my arm and I don't care when they happen! He has his job, I have mine, and we both crack on with them!

@Rain I ignore the mess that is my husband's desk - it's in a corner of our dining room and if it's messy it's his problem - I just don't look at it!!

OP posts:

Neonprint · 30/04/2021 16:30

Jesus I don't know my own calendar let alone my other half's! l like the reply suggest above 10am will be fine!

MiddleParking · 30/04/2021 16:50

*unless you actually read the OP..

and quite frankly I don't care!

we got that...*

Which is really very different from “if an OP posted that her husband could't care less and didn't want to know about her schedule because he was too important, so she should be dealing with all the boring and petty stuff because her job didn't count...”

ouchmyfeet · 30/04/2021 19:12

I hear you OP. So fucking sick of my lazy twat of a husband. That whole incredulous "I'm WORKING" thing drives me absolutely bonkers. I'm on the verge of stopping cooking his meals. Already stopped doing his laundry a long time ago

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