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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In A&E and need to update manager - AIBU to run message past you all?

75 replies

HRVY · 30/04/2021 07:59

Went to A&E late last night to get checked out, as I’ve had quite bad stomach pains for a couple of days and was getting worried it could be something serious like appendicitis.

Doctors have run some tests, and all looking good so far thankfully. They want to do an ultrasound just as a precaution though. As ultrasounds aren’t available till this 9am, I’ve been kept in so I can get a scan as soon as possible this morning.

I’m meant to be logging on for work at 9, but that of course clashes with the scan. Luckily, it’s a v quiet period with no urgent tasks though!

Wondering how to let my line manager know about all of this (first time I’ve done a work ‘sick note’) - how does this sound?

Hi X, really sorry but I don’t think I’ll be able to make it in this morning. I felt really unwell yesterday so headed to A&E last night just as a precaution, and they’re doing some tests and scans this morning. I’m sure it’s all going to be fine, but just wanted to let you know. Thanks, HRVY.

I’m wondering if I need to add anything about logging on later if I feel better? Also - wondering if mentioning ‘scans’ makes it all sound worrying and dramatic - should I just say ‘tests’?

Grateful for any thoughts! Thanks :)

OP posts:
Embracingthechaos · 30/04/2021 09:47

Hi OP, I have RTFT so I've seen you have already contacted manager, but I just wanted to offer some advice;

When emailing in sick, be brief and to the point. Forget about "I'm sorry but I don't think I'll be able to make it in". Never use this phrase. It implies that it is up for discussion and that they have the option to tell you no, and paints a picture that you aren't actually that unwell. Always keep it simple and factual; "Hi xManagerx, I won't be coming in/logging on today. I was admitted to hospital last night due to suspected appenditicis. I am waiting for an ultrasound. I'll update you as soon as possible."

UserAtRandom · 30/04/2021 09:47

You know a text or email has been picked up when your manager replies to you.

And if they don't reply to you? Most people want to ring in sick and then go and rest. They don't want to hang around waiting to see if they get a response, and if they don't end up ringing in anyway.

CleverCatty · 30/04/2021 09:47

@kerosene20

Hope you’re ok OP. I would keep it a little more brief

Hi X I’m afraid I won’t be in today. I had to come to A&E yesterday and they have kept me in for tests and observation. I will let you know if I am ok for work tomorrow. Thanks, HRVY

This.

Don't say you don't think you'll be in etc - you're not work, you're at A&E you definitely won't be in. Give brief explanations but don't feel guilty you're 'off' sick.

ShirleyPhallus · 30/04/2021 09:50

@UserAtRandom

You know a text or email has been picked up when your manager replies to you.

And if they don't reply to you? Most people want to ring in sick and then go and rest. They don't want to hang around waiting to see if they get a response, and if they don't end up ringing in anyway.

Ummmm then you call in at the time you usually would?

If you’re up at 5am puking, send your manager a text and if they reply then go back to bed. If they don’t, set an alarm for 8 or whenever you would call in usually.

This way is actually easier.

YouJustFoldItIn · 30/04/2021 09:50

Hi X, really sorry but I don’t think I’ll be able to make it in this morning. I felt really unwell yesterday so headed to A&E last night just as a precaution, and they’re doing some tests and scans this morning. I’m sure it’s all going to be fine, but just wanted to let you know. Thanks, HRVY.

I appreciate this is probably too late now, but for what it's worth, all texts for sick leave start by saying 'I'm really sorry but I don't think I'll be able to make it in this morning, I've been feeling really unwell...' and probably half of them are lying.

You don't need to apologise or over explain. In this situation all that was needed was:

'Hi X, just wanted to let you know that I had to go to A&E last night with suspected appendicitis. I have been kept in overnight and I am currently awaiting tests and a scan. I'll update you as soon as I have more news.'

CleverCatty · 30/04/2021 09:51

@UserAtRandom

You know a text or email has been picked up when your manager replies to you.

And if they don't reply to you? Most people want to ring in sick and then go and rest. They don't want to hang around waiting to see if they get a response, and if they don't end up ringing in anyway.

I tend to now - in a contract job so not perm but sort of treated as one - if I feel sick especially during the night - I send an email from my personal email, don't even do an OOO (that's more for holidays imo) so I let my agency know, my LM and that's it. I don't get paid if I'm off sick either.

If my manager sends a reply via email that's great but if I'm sick I want to rest/sleep etc - not worry about responding to them etc.

BeardyButton · 30/04/2021 09:53

Jesus Christ.... the places most of you work?!? If I had stomach pain intense enough to merit a and e, my boss would be horrified at the thought of me worrying about “making sure I check in after my scan or log on”.

OP you are sick! You should be thinking about getting better, not worrying about sickness policy. I thank my lucky stars sometimes that I work in a humane environment.

ittakes2 · 30/04/2021 09:54

If I had a staff member tell me they were in A&E I would not be expecting them to log on that day!

Doris86 · 30/04/2021 10:01

Some people really overthink things!

It’s quite simple. A message saying you won’t be at work, as you’ve had to go to A&E, and you’ll call to update when you know more.

It’s that simple!

Yummymummy2020 · 30/04/2021 10:04

I think you are worrying about it too much, you def don’t have to give a lot of info as the hospital will give you a note I’m sure. It’s plenty to say I wasn’t feeling well so I had to go to hospital who have kept me in to run some tests and I will let you know when I have more information.
Then you can just update her as needed! Honestly don’t worry that’s the last thing you need to think about in hospital!

EmeraldShamrock · 30/04/2021 10:08

Change I don't think as I won't be in.
Hope you're feeling better, these things happen don't worry about it.

BarbaraofSeville · 30/04/2021 10:09

@Doris86

Some people really overthink things!

It’s quite simple. A message saying you won’t be at work, as you’ve had to go to A&E, and you’ll call to update when you know more.

It’s that simple!

It's really better to phone than send a message like that though.

Employer will have no idea how serious the potential illness is and are likely to worry unnecessarily. Reason employers want a phone call is so they can have a normal conversation and ask questions rather than the mindfield for misunderstanding that a text is.

The OP could have phoned her boss just before 9 this morning and spoken to someone to pass a message on, rather than all this angst.

Aprilinspringtimeshower · 30/04/2021 10:16

@AppleKatie

that’s fine. But you could also keep it simpler-

Dear manager,

I will not be able to work today as I was admitted to hospital late last night. I expect to be out later today and will keep you updated as things progress.

HRVY

And obviously don’t work this afternoon.

This is better. You are allowed to attend hosptial appointments. You don’t know what they will find. You’re first message is minimilising and heavily suggesting you’ll definitely be back in. You don’t know that

Just say admitted to hospital, having test today. Will give you update ASAP.

HeyDemonsItsYaGirl · 30/04/2021 10:31

So much overthinking and overanalysing here. When one of my team calls in sick (well, messages in sick) the wording doesn't even register. All I take from it is they won't be in. Who are you weirdos who see "I'm sorry", or more than two lines, and start suspecting all sorts of nonsense?

iklboo · 30/04/2021 10:39

We have to phone in - can't message or ask someone to call for us unless were physically incapable. We're expected to say why and a rough idea when we'll be back. Bloody madness.

Hope all has gone well OP.

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 30/04/2021 10:47

@iklboo

We have to phone in - can't message or ask someone to call for us unless were physically incapable. We're expected to say why and a rough idea when we'll be back. Bloody madness.

Hope all has gone well OP.

That level of mistrust and suspicion is really unpleasant. Imagine if you live on your own and have been taken into hospital and are unconscious for one reason or another? Oh, right, yes, the nurses have to guess that you need them to call in to work to confirm you're ill and unable to come to the phone - and it's hardly in their own job description, anyway.
Ilovedthe70s · 30/04/2021 10:51

Sincerely hope you are ok and discharged soon.

With my employer we have to phone ourselves and speak the duty manager. Regardless of what is wrong no one can call on your behalf unless you are unconscious and no one is allowed to take a message if the manager won’t take the call. Text or email is expressly forbidden.
This is a minimum wage retail job. We have to call every day. The first question asked is when you will be back. We don’t get sick pay.

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 30/04/2021 10:58

I'm sorry, should have said, I hope all is well with the scan and that you feel better soon, @HRVY.

@Ilovedthe70s - WTAF? I'm so sorry. All this and no sick pay? Is that anything to do with zero hours contracts, or just normal nowadays? It makes me think, I have lived a sheltered work life, I must say. Also it's an awfully long time since I worked in England.

iklboo · 30/04/2021 11:17

Yes we have to speak to a manager too. We can't leave a message with a colleague. Which can mean having to make multiple calls until you find one in - and no getting back to sleep / resting until you do.

poppycat10 · 30/04/2021 11:27

We won't accept a text or and email. It must be a phone call in person - we won't even accept a third party unless there is a substantial reason why the person cannot phone themselves

well if you're in hospital they'd have to accept a text or 3rd party message. Surely the policy is designed for if you are in bed at home.

Peachee · 30/04/2021 11:27

100% follow Apple Katie’s advice short sweet and to the point.. update manager later when you know more..

Christmasfairy2020 · 30/04/2021 12:22

Our policy is we need to ring. Just ring and say I'm in hospital at moment I haven't been well over night hopefully everything is OK and oll be in tomorrow

Megan2018 · 30/04/2021 12:29

We expect staff to telephone unless they are physically unable, it’s in our policy doc.

But if someone is unwell they aren’t expected to do any work at all, not even log on. And no need to apologise.

Tibtab · 30/04/2021 12:32

We have to call every day, even when you have something like gastroenteritis which means you have to be off for 48 hours at least. It’s a massive pain that they can’t just trust you.

Headyhurty · 30/04/2021 12:35

For any staff member of mine, I'd just expect them to let me know they're in hospital waiting for tests and I wouldn't expect to see them until the following day at the earliest.

Technically they should call but I'd accept a text in this situation.

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