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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To call into school sick when actually on holiday?

199 replies

RosieLancs · 28/04/2021 08:43

AIBU to lie to the school and pretend the kids are off sick when we are in fact on holidaying?
In a rash moment I booked a caravan holiday for me and the kids the week before half term.
It has been a long year and I feel like we deserve a little family break.
I would normally go in school holiday time but it was over triple the price for the half term week which took it out of our price range.

I know I could land myself with an £120 fine here and if that happened then so be it but would I be unreasonable to just ring them in sick for that week?
Has anyone else done this and gotten away with it before?

If its relevant - after a recent parents evening both of their teachers said they were still very confident and well adjusted after the lockdowns of the last year and both are working at 'Greater Depth' for their age group so I don't feel missing 5 days of school will harm them in any way.

OP posts:
FeelinHappy · 28/04/2021 11:32

Glad you have a plan OP. The 4.5 day thing is quite common here too. Enjoy your holiday!

Esmereldapawpatrol · 28/04/2021 11:35

I say go for it, they won't suffer missing those days and some things are more important after the year everyone has had.
I would be honest though as otherwise the children might say something at school and you don't want them to have to lie. We have done it in the past (DH is forces and was going to miss the entire summer holidays as got posted away last minute so we took the kids out) and there weren't any issues.

SeaTurtles92 · 28/04/2021 11:43

The fines are ridiculous! Just do it and enjoy your holiday with your kids.
I always went in school time on holidays as did everyone else I know.

It's one week not one month.

And even if the kids did slip up are the teachers really that bothered. I know I wouldn't be.

MysteriousMonkey · 28/04/2021 11:49

I've done this and I don't see the problem. The school won't really want to deal with your honesty and it doesn't change the fact that the children missed school. Lie, enjoy your holiday!

Original poster
RosieLancs · 28/04/2021 12:24

Thankyou to everyone who replied especially to those who used constructive criticism.
As I said in a previous update, upon investigation I can get away with a 4 & a half day absence without a fine so I will let the school know and hope for the best.
I knew my kids would tell people and I had no intention of asking them to lie - I known enough teachers to know they wouldn't be running off to office to tell tales.

For all the angry folk who made up stuff in their heads... some of you are so funny....
I never said I was going to pretend they have covid.
They are both in year 6 at school, one had 100 % attendance for the entirety of junior school and the other has missed one afternoon which was when she was sent home after banging her head.
As I said in my original post, at a recent parents evening both of their teachers said they were incredibly well adjusted after the lockdowns and both were working at 'Greater Depth' which for those who don't know basically means they're ahead of where they need to be for the end of year 6.
Although I never asked my children to lie I also don't teach them it is always wrong to lie, sometimes it is okay to to spare other people's feelings.
Lord knows I've told enough lies myself in this past year when I've held people's hands and told them everything was going to be okay even though I knew they'd probably would die before the night was out.
I never said I was special or more deserving than anyone else - people can make their own decisions on how to live their lives but personally after a year of juggling homeschooling the twins between me and my 18 year old daughter while we worked opposing shifts, her as a key worker and me as a critical worker I do think I deserve a little holiday without being fined.
Personally I think anyone who has worked in direct contact with covid patients whether that be in care homes or as part of the NHS deserves 2 weeks all inclusive in a resort of their choice fully paid for but as it happens after spending a year risking my life daily for a largely ungrateful country I can barely afford 4 nights at bloody Haven and I would like to do that without bring fined another £120 on top of that.

I bet having to work from home and home school wasn't easy neither was spending all night taking care of dying people and then (depending on which stage of the pandemic we were at) either trying to sleep in a noisy hotel whilst feeling incredibly guilty that my 18 year old was having to homeschool them and missing them so much it hurt OR coming home and grabbing a few hours sleep in naps throughout the day in-between home schooling.
I know I could have sent them into school but that seemed like an unnecessary additional risk.
6 months ago you were clapping for us and now you begrudge me 4 nights in a caravan 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
RosieLancs · 28/04/2021 12:25

Sorry, my last update got a bit ranty... I'm tired and need more coffee I think 🤔

OP posts:
Jowak1 · 28/04/2021 12:30

Hello I completely understand and think a lot of people will choose to do this considering the year everyone has just had. However just be honest, speaking from experience I have told the school that my son when he was about 6 was ill ( on a Friday ) as we were at my sister I. Laws wedding . When my son went in I the Monday the teacher asked my son if he was feeling better and he replied " I wasn't ill I was at my Aunts wedding!" There was no way I was going to tell him off as I had always told him to tell the truth! That's the only time Ive ever lied and will never do again!! I felt awful seeing his teacher for ages after .

Embracingthechaos · 28/04/2021 23:19

@RosieLancs

Sorry, my last update got a bit ranty... I'm tired and need more coffee I think 🤔
I think your rant is understandable, given some of the ridiculous responses you've had here.

I swear that Helen Lovejoy and her cronies have MN accounts...

Summerdayshaze · 28/04/2021 23:41

I’m a school governor. We always, always know. We might not be able to prove it, but we know. And the teachers and staff always think less of parents who lie and make their children lie.

LucyLastick · 28/04/2021 23:51

I work in a primary school. Couple of years ago a little boy had been off for a week with tonsillitis and then came to see me with a Disneyland Paris fridge magnet he'd bought me.

Maggiesfarm · 28/04/2021 23:56

@LucyLastick

I work in a primary school. Couple of years ago a little boy had been off for a week with tonsillitis and then came to see me with a Disneyland Paris fridge magnet he'd bought me.
That is priceless :-).
Puttingouthefirewithgasoline · 29/04/2021 00:01

No one will be affected by your dc having a holiday and certainly not to the degree of joy your dc will get to going away after lock down. Go.

GrandTheftWalrus · 29/04/2021 00:04

Why do they fine both parents?

DD will be missing 8 days of school next year when we go abroad. I can't afford term time prices so we will be going in September for 10 nights.

However I'm in Scotland so I don't think we get fined up here.

Puttingouthefirewithgasoline · 29/04/2021 00:04

Summer, our school is the kind where governsers kids get the top roles, we have zero respect for the cabal that is our governing body, hand in glove with the head... Couldn't care less what ours know our don't.

We are a religious school and I had to stop attending their church, I Could not bear to see their pious faces walking down the ailse after communion.

Puttingouthefirewithgasoline · 29/04/2021 00:05

Op did your school support dc in covid? Ours couldn't have done less
...

Puttingouthefirewithgasoline · 29/04/2021 00:06

Op please won't worry about what people say on here's for goodness sake lie and enjoy your holiday. Life is short.. DO a teeny bit of work away... Go go go and enjoy!!

SavingsQuestions · 29/04/2021 00:10

People on the whole aren't saying not to go. I think holidays are fine.

They are saying to be honest about it.

No need to do work when away tbh .

Homehaircuts · 29/04/2021 00:13

What if someone asks are you better now? They will likely talk about the holiday so you may get rumbled to. Believe me it's very tempting and I had holidays out of school when I was a kid and lived it. But my parents didn't have to lie to do it. I know it seems unfair but I don't think it's worth the hassle and I more importantly I wouldn't want my kids to think it's ok to lie to get what you want. Even if it's not fair and they deserve a nice holiday. Not worth it imo.

GrandTheftWalrus · 29/04/2021 00:13

Also due to the nature of our jobs from May - early September is very very busy and it's hard to get holidays then.

Homehaircuts · 29/04/2021 00:17

*loved not lived!
You you ask to go fill out the request form and if they don't authorise it, maybe count the fine as the holiday money? Is it more than what you would pay in term time? If not it's probably worth the hit.

MyDcAreMarvel · 29/04/2021 00:22

@SardineJam Yes, agree with PP, £60 per parent per day where we live
Tell the school, we always did and no issue Grin it’s not perfect day!

MyDcAreMarvel · 29/04/2021 00:22

*per day

PheasantPlucker1 · 29/04/2021 00:23

Summerdayshaze Im a teacher, and have no problem with this as long as its not in KS4. Nor does any teacher I know, apart from the attendance officer.

A weeks bonding and relaxing with the family is great, and an opportunity to learn something different. Class time can be made up, especially so at the moment when we have so many absent for 2 weeks each time.

newnortherner111 · 29/04/2021 06:54

Whilst I don't agree with fines, if by some chance you do receive one, accept it with a good grace and I am glad to read you are going to be honest with the school.

SunIsComing · 29/04/2021 06:56

Go sick the first day, then have holiday the rest of the week. Sorted. No fine, almost honest. The kids will get so much out of a holiday.