Privacy

[xjox1983]

Just looking for some advice

Dyslexic so excuse the spelling and grammar

We got burgled 2 weeks ago
I say burgled but they only came in the house for the car keys.
We had cash and laptops in the living room
Yet nothing else was taken l.

Now my partner had added cameras
I am totally fine with this
My issue lies is that he has given access to his daughter from from a previous relationship.
Generally no issues between me and sd although we both find her very controlling off his time pretty much her way or the Highway in which he always gives in
I can cope with this most of the time although disagree ( she is autistic and teenage girl )
My issue is I totally feel like I have no privacy whatsoever.
I am a smoker so quite often stand at just outside the door sometimes having a chat to my friends in which I have no issue with my partner hearing but not a teenage girl

I was not told that he had given her access to these cameras
And I found out by her phone beeping at the front door then him saying along the lines of shhh like she doesn't know
I have said I feel very uneasy about this
And that my privacy is none existent
But all his daughter said was well me and dad said you shouldn't be talking at the frount door anyway if you don't want me to hear.

ITS MY HOME

Nip this in the bud now. Simply state it's not happening and get it resolved, can you change the details for the cameras or reset them to remove her.

They're bang out of order.
Can you reset them yourself so she doesn't have access? Or, start talking about personal things about him he wouldn't want her to know right by the cameras. Once he feels his privacy is compromised he might change his mind.

He is the main user
And you have own log in and account so I can not find a way to do this As I feel if I take his phone and delete her then he will set up another.
He said with her being a teenager then she is up till early hours so will see more than us
I said no good when she 15 miles away and if the Alerts don't wake us ( I'm a light sleeper anyway so would wake up ) up then she definitely won't be able to

I just feel controlled and violated but they seem to think I'm the one that's got the issue

Brill idea

He was talking about her in the garden yesterday
I will make the point of doing it more
I will have to do that tomorrow though as I have just made a big thing about I will only be using the back door
In which means he has to completely move and rebuild the way the garden is

I just know she will be watching when im in out and everything I say

This is totally unacceptable and I’d immediately do something dramatic like disabling the entire system until it is resolved. If no resolution then I’d cut the cables or whatever needed to happen so the situation was halted.

Living in a Big Brother environment having private conversations monitored remotely in real-time is not something I’d tolerate.

I’m quite hardline about things like this tho as I love my uncensored privacy and won’t even have an Alexa so what you’re describing is my hell 😂

If they're wifi cameras just turn the wifi off.

If they work via wifi, then change the wifi password so they aren't connected.

What on earth does she need access for? She is a child, a controlling one with quite an attitude too. I would be very upset and feel disrespected by your dp. It is your home and a child does not need to have access to the cameras. Do they often do this to you?

A teenager has access to your home security camera that records sound.
You've said you want it stopped and have been told no, tough shit basically and you shouldn't be talking there.

What fun to live in.
I'd just rip it out.
I couldn't be arsed to deal with this level of stupid.
It's so intrusive.

I wouldn't trust him to disable her access either.

If it's Wi-Fi just turn it off or pull plug tgen you can put it back on if you like after your cigarette.

@xjox1983

Just looking for some advice

Dyslexic so excuse the spelling and grammar

We got burgled 2 weeks ago
I say burgled but they only came in the house for the car keys.
We had cash and laptops in the living room
Yet nothing else was taken l.

Now my partner had added cameras
I am totally fine with this
My issue lies is that he has given access to his daughter from from a previous relationship.
Generally no issues between me and sd although we both find her very controlling off his time pretty much her way or the Highway in which he always gives in
I can cope with this most of the time although disagree ( she is autistic and teenage girl )
My issue is I totally feel like I have no privacy whatsoever.
I am a smoker so quite often stand at just outside the door sometimes having a chat to my friends in which I have no issue with my partner hearing but not a teenage girl

I was not told that he had given her access to these cameras
And I found out by her phone beeping at the front door then him saying along the lines of shhh like she doesn't know
I have said I feel very uneasy about this
And that my privacy is none existent
But all his daughter said was well me and dad said you shouldn't be talking at the frount door anyway if you don't want me to hear.

ITS MY HOME

I'd move out. This is a fucking joke. He obviously puts her wants above yours. Fuck him off.

Thank you all so much

Been a long day

I think he gets torn between giving in for easy life and us getting any respect

But not a chance In hell does he let my older child get away with disrespect towards us

I think this is going to be a very long few days argument
But not a chance am I giving in
Scouts for eldest son tommorow night what a shame if internet goes down while I'm out and if no joy then he can move back to his parents my house my privacy

Going to have some rather private conversations he may not want her hearing at the door first though

So it's your house not his? That's even worse.
Good luck op.

This is rediculious. If this is actually your house I am dismayed on how your boyfriend thinks this is acceptable. This has given his daughter permission to spy on you, your conversations, your comings and going’s, what you talk about while smoking and he is fine with all of it. Boundaries, bigs ones need to be created. The first being is that a literal teenager has no right to spy on the adults who are responsible for her well being. What a fucking awful parent your OH is, she thinks this is fine because he gave her the ok.

Get rid of him.

This is a horribly toxic dynamic, and I cannot imagine it's the only issue in an otherwise wonderful relationship. No one should live like that in their own homes! Get rid of this awful man and his awful daughter.

You are right to put a stop to this madness. I can't for the life of me understand why his daughter should be monitoring cameras in your home.

Unbelievable OP.

Get him out.

Why are you accepting this treatment in your home?

OMG he is so out of order, I would definitely be having a conversation about his erectile dysfunction when you have your next ciggie.