I’m crying my eyes out and my 35 year old partner is having a great time in the sitting room, not giving a flying f**k. We fight more and more lately and i feel angry and hurt by him so much of the time. He drinks about 12 times the recommended amount of alcohol each week, and smokes weed every day. The last few months he’s stayed up all night high and drunk watching movies, leaving me to go to bed alone and then find him at 3am passed out on the sofa or be woken up by him stumbling into bed. When we get along, we get along so well - he’s loving and caring and affectionate, and I really adore him. I got up to go to the bathroom earlier and saw he’d blocked the door to the sitting room with a chair (glass door), to stop me going in. No big fight today, no context - other than him being slightly grumpy with me earlier. I went in and asked him what the hell was going on. he begged me to leave, to not bring him drama, and that he couldn’t bear to see me right now. Repelled by me being there, pulling at his hair. I’m so shocked and hurt and confused - I have no idea why he’s done this. I told him to sleep in there and not come to bed. So now he’s happily passed out in peace, while I’m crying from shock and hurt. I’m so confused and unhappy these days, even though I love him so much. We’ve been through so much. How can he behave like this and not care about how much it hurts me.