Mumsnet Logo
My feed

to access all these features


To ask for tips on getting through the days at work (stress)

7 replies

Iorderedyouapancake · 25/04/2021 20:36

Hi all, I’m at the point where I just can’t cope with work anymore, it’s making me stressed to the point of illness and every weekend is spent in tears dreading Monday morning. I am making plans to get out but realistically that is going to take a few months and I feel completely unable to manage that at the moment. Does anyone have any useful tips for just getting through the days? I thought once I’d made the decision to leave it would get easier but it hasn’t made any difference- probably because it still seems so far away/ I don’t have a firm date. For those who’ve been through similar- how did you manage? (I know this probably doesn’t belong in Aibu but I am getting in a panic about tomorrow and hoping I will be more likely to get replies this way).
Thanks all

OP posts:

ElderMillennial · 25/04/2021 20:40

Why are you stressed? Too much work? Environment? Other factors?

If you are stressed by work then is this something you can speak to your manager / HR about?

I am stressed by work at the moment and it's a combination of personal circumstances that mean I am anxious and stressed but also I simply have too much work to do. I am working late and over lunch and not able to take days off. I have had to raise it with my manager and HR.


roxyk0303 · 25/04/2021 20:49

Is there anything in particular that is stressing you out?

Advice would be different depending on whether it's the actual work or colleagues etc

One thing I have found helps my stress at work is repeated telling myself I can only do one thing at a time. Anything more than that impossible


Iorderedyouapancake · 25/04/2021 20:49

It’s a combination of workload, having to deal with a bunch of arseholes on a daily basis (including my boss and several of the people who work for me ☹️). I know from bitter experience (been here for years) that things won’t change which is why I’ve decided to move on, I guess what I’m hoping to find is techniques just for coping each day in the meantime and trying not to let it get to me so much?

OP posts:

Theshoepeople · 25/04/2021 21:04

I feel for you OP, I've been there!
My two tips would be: at work/at the end of the work day write a list. Two columns on a piece of paper, things that went wrong; things that went right. Obv one column will feel easy to write, but for each of those try and find a positive. Even if it's 'i reacted better to X person than I did last time' or 'dealing with X is developing my skills in managing difficult people'
As you get more stressed and in survival mode, your brain is primed to see the negative - in the past that is what would keep you alive, by seeing the bad stuff and avoiding it. Not so helpful in the modern world.
Second tip would be practical ways of releasing stress - exercise if you're able to, even just a short walk.


Whatapalavaa · 25/04/2021 21:16

I really feel for you. I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown a couple of weeks ago before I went to the GP. Also making plans to leave. Here's what I do, not all of these are healthy.

I run 3 days a week and have recently started anti-ds. I'm taking regular 5 minute breaks throughout my day (WFH) to make a cup of tea, loo, stretch legs, hang out washing, cuddle dog etc. I reiterate in my mind that I can only do what I can get done, I am not an octopus with limbs to do fifty things at once. I remind myself that it's just a job and employers like to pile more and more on you as much as they can get away with. I prioritise which emails I need to reply to that day and which can wait or go ignored... I drink most evenings. I remind myself that if I was to walk out tomorrow they'd replace and soon forget about me. I remind myself that my mental health comes first. Early nights. Nice easy food. Recently I've been so exhausted (side effects of ADs) that it has reduced my stress because I'm simply too tired to care which has been a blessing in disguise really.

Are you able to go see your GP or take some leave?


Lisyloo725 · 25/04/2021 21:19

Hi OP,
I’ve been thru a hellish year at work - I had been with the company 11y but moved departments in Jan 2020 - basically my friend is the big boss - and that’s why almost all of the team dislike me.
Anyway, I have been TTC so had to stay if I wanted to benefit from any maternity pay - as you know - it’s be my luck that I’d get preggo the month that I was leaving.
Long story short - I have my end date now (I’m due in Autumn) and I feel ALIVE again for the first time in over a year. Even a colleague (a nice one I’ve told) said that I have a new found ‘I don’t give a shit now’ confidence. And he’s right.
I think having the end date, even if like me, is a long time off - will really help.
I suppose this is getting a new job for most people. Sometimes even finding a few jobs that you can apply for and get excited about - get hopeful about - is lifting. Can you seek help of a recruiter? I know they’re hard work but writing job application letters always cheers me is as you realise what you’ve achieved/how good you are as you’re forced to put it all down. That can be quite therapeutic!
I like the pp‘S suggestion of the two lists at the end of the day.
In my toughest days I tried to keep my head down. Some in the office would wear headphones - so I made sure I did too. Allows you to ignore the shite. Try not to do more or less than what you need to do. Pop to the loo a bit more often (and take your phone for some entertainment) - make more drinks to facilitate this!
Make the most use of the breaks that you’re allowed. Perhaps don’t take your lunch with you which’ll force you to have to walk to Tesco for a sandwich. And as the weather is nicer now, is there somewhere you can sit to eat it? Even get a blanket and a flask or whatever and a book maybe to make this time nice.
Lastly, Friday treats. We did this while waiting for a house purchase a while ago - was a verrry shakey deal. We had a bottle of champers every Friday night to celebrate each week we’d got through.

I’d start that up again now, but can’t as preggo hahah

Good luck OP - it’s the worst I know. You’ll get thru it. X x


idontlikealdi · 25/04/2021 21:21

Focus on getting out, engage with recruiters, update your LinkedIn to be open to offers.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Sign up to continue reading

Mumsnet's better when you're logged in. You can customise your experience and access way more features like messaging, watch and hide threads, voting and much more.

Already signed up?