Hi,
So I have nothing in common with my brother and his partner - my brother and I have never been close as adults and they live their lives in a very different way to me (they commit benefit fraud and have a number of dodgy schemes on the go) whereas my husband and I clearly don’t believe in that way of life. I’ve always kept in touch though and visited / made sure I’ve sent presents because of their three kids (it’s not their fault how they’re being brought up!). I live about an hour and 45 mins away from them and (pre covid) visited two or three times a year. Before living where I do now, I lived three and a half hours away but would still visit a couple of times a year and stay in a hotel (to see my parents too as they live near them). I had my little boy at the beginning of March last year and my brother and his family have made no effort to see him. Of course we went into lockdown three weeks after he was born but there have been multiple occasions they could have seen him, be it when lockdown was lifted over summer or at other times when we could meet outside / rule of six. For example I’ve met my parents (when allowed) for picnics in the Peak District, which is the halfway point. On several occasions I’ve said ‘just let me know what day you’d like to meet / come over’ etc. My brother’s girlfriend says they’re desperate to meet him but then I never hear about any plans. I think the presumption is I should travel to them as I always have done (they’ve never visited me wherever I’ve lived). I then start feeling guilty and think maybe I should just go over, but should I?! My husband thinks I should just leave it and let them make the plans for once.