Mumsnet Logo
My feed

to access all these features


AIBU to scrap the diets?

22 replies

IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 08:52

I'm 25 and have spent most of my life on a 'diet'. The thing is....I'm short and 4-5 stone overweight. I look as wide as I am tall!

I've tried calorie counting, weight watchers, slimming world and slim fast and can never stick to them.

I've had a good think over the past few days and have decided to scrap the diets and just make better food choices. A few changes I've decided to make are: one jacket potato with tuna and salad rather than 2 Jacket potatoes with beans and loads of cheese, oats with berries rather than three cups of tea each with 2 sugars in, one fajita rather than three served with salad rather than a pile of chips etc.

Has anyone actually lost weight this way? I just want to learn how to make better choices and I'm sure once I start to feel less bloated and more energetic I'll more enthusiastic about keeping it up.

It's got to the point now where I look hideous, theres no shape to my face as it's too fat, I have zero waistline and as a result of my unhealthy eating habits I'm starting to feel sluggish and depressed ahhhhhh😫

OP posts:

OrangeRug · 23/04/2021 09:02

I'm very short too (4'11) and although I've never been overweight I do gain weight easily and have struggled with bulimia for most of my life. I've found it easiest to control my weight when sticking to a mostly whole food plant based diet. Lots of stir fries, soups, fruit and nuts and I try to avoid heavy carbs cause they just make me feel like shit. I also subscribed to Deanne Berry Bodies (remember the woman from the Call On Me music video? Her workouts are so fun it's the first time I've ever kept up a long term exercise routine in my life. But yeah faddy diets are totally pointless so YANBU.


MaMaD1990 · 23/04/2021 09:04

I think you're way of doing it should work as long as you use healthy ingredients (for example if you're having tuna mayo with your JP, only use a small amount of mayo). I also learnt that if you don't enjoy the taste of your food, you're less likely to stick to it - research healthy but really flavoursome dishes (herbs and spices are your friends here!). I'd expect to feel a bit hungry for a while whilst you transition, but up the water intake and power through. You're just getting your body used to the normal portion sizes. I hope it goes well for you!


Laggartha · 23/04/2021 09:05

OP YANBU. I recommend Rangan Chatterjee’s books and podcasts.


Thelastwalker · 23/04/2021 09:05

I agree . Make one meal a day carb free . Instead of the oats have some berries , fage 5% natural yoghurt , some flaxseed and nuts . Delicious. Go for the wholemeal wrap too .


IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 09:08

Thanks for your replies!

Thanks @OrangeRug I'll look into that. I really struggle with exercise and always have done. I used to have an excuse to not take part in PE every week at secondary school.

@MaMaD1990 I'm expecting to feel hungry for a while...I really dont understand when people say that you should never feel hungry on a diet. My potion sizes have been so huge for so long that theres no way I can change my eating habits without feeling hungry. Yes I agree herbs and spices will help massively with making nice meals.

OP posts:

NeverMetANiceOne · 23/04/2021 09:13

Feeling hungry is a normal feeling, nowadays it seems to really upset people but it should happen regularly. I lost 5 stone a couple of years ago by simply sticking to 3 rules (1300 cals a day, low carb, low refined sugar) and have kept it off by continuing to make sensible choices like recognising what hunger feels like, eating until I'm not hungry any more, and waiting until my stomach rumbles before I eat a meal.


IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 09:22

@Laggartha thank you I'll check them out.

@Thelastwalker ooooo I love fage yoghurt its sooo lovely and thick. I'll add it to my shopping list.

@NeverMetANiceOne yes I agree. I need to teach myself that I've got nothing to panick about when I feel hungry. I've spent so many years trying to follow slimming world and had the 'no need to feel hungry' line drummed into my head that i feel awful when i do feel hungry and shove a load of fatty sugary food into my mouth. What i need to be taught is how to react when i feel hungry as it isnt always a bad thing to feel this way.

OP posts:

araiwa · 23/04/2021 09:27

Which diet was recommending 2 sugars in tea??

I don't follow a diet, I just have reasonable portions of nutritious, low calorie food and I've lost 2 stone in last 2 months. I've also upped my exercise levels


NeverMetANiceOne · 23/04/2021 09:28

Diets can really screw up your thinking when it comes to food. I used to panic when I felt hungry too, I'd feel 'hard done by' and think I deserve to eat more because I'd actually got hungry, its so daft!
Good luck to you, its hard but if I can do it then I really believe anyone can! If you can somehow remove the emotion from the process of eating then you'll get there.


ElleL91 · 23/04/2021 09:28

I'm currently loosing weight to reduce my BMI for IVF.

I've found that instead of sticking to a certain diet I just eat what I know is good for me etc and it works fine.

I've lost 5lbs this week just watching what I eat and I also go for a walk at lunchtime and the gym in the afternoon.

I find that you are hungry at the beginning while your stomach gets used to the smaller portion sizes but after a couple of weeks I get used to it and don't feel as hungry.



rbe78 · 23/04/2021 09:30

I would agree that making healthy food choices on a permanent basis is waaaaay better than going on and off diets all the time. Any weight loss might be very slow in comparison, but it will be healthy and sustainable.

I hear you about exercise (uck, PE lessons!), but after a life-long aversion to running especially I took up Couch 2 5k during the second lockdown. I now run 5 -8km three times a week - I don't weigh myself, but I have clothes hanging off me now, without making any changes to my (hearty) diet. Annoyingly, exercise really does make a difference.


DaphneBridgerton · 23/04/2021 09:41

To be fair.. what you described does sound like a diet to me.. it's just not a fad or a calorie based plan. This way will require willpower and also honesty with yourself about how much you're really eating if you know what I mean. But maybe relaxing your rules around food will be good for you. Give it 6 weeks and see if you've lost any weight! Also, I was stunned to realise how many calories there are in oil, mayo etc so it's worth avoiding those where possible


IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 09:42

@araiwa non of them.

@NeverMetANiceOne that's exactly how I feel. I feel really hard done by just because I feel hungry. When I feel hungry, all I can think about is food which in turn makes me feel more hungry. It's such a silly way of thinking. I definitely need to train myself out of it.

@ElleL91 good luck for you and I hope you can reach your goal and get cracking with IVF. X

@rbe78 I actually really like just walking. I love just grabbing a bottle of water and going for a long walk. I've got a 3 year old and he is at that tricky stage where he is to big for the pushchair but to small to be walking for miles. I'm on my own with him late into the evening so my chances of going for a walk/run are slim at the minute. I'll have to the of somthing I can do at home/in the garden for now and take advantage of my lunch hour when he is at nursery so I can have a nice walk.

OP posts:

IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 09:50

@DaphneBridgerton I dont think it sounds like a diet but I do think its vastly different from my normal eating habits so I know I'm going to struggle massively but I'm hoping I feel better for it.

OP posts:

NeverMetANiceOne · 23/04/2021 09:51

I've got to a point now where I feel a bit proud of my tummy rumbling and I enjoy the feeling of being hungry. That probably sounds really unhealthy, but I enjoy it because I plan what I'm going to eat when I finish whatever I'm doing, and I find being hungry makes me more energetic and my brain is less sluggish than when I ate all the time.

Full disclosure - I had a big problem with eating my feelings and binging. My mum is overweight and hated herself for it so I've grown up having no respect for overweight people, and therefore ended up overweight with no self respect. Happy to think/hope I've broken that cycle now.


Pedalpushers · 23/04/2021 10:00

I agree with @DaphneBridgerton that you're basically following a diet by cutting your food intake - but that's great. Healthier choices for me means filling plate with vegetables, avoiding sugary foods and being mindful of things with lots of hidden calories that add up without giving you any nutrition like fizzy drinks, sugar in tea, alcohol, dressing, mayo etc.


IDontWantToAdultToday · 23/04/2021 10:08

@Pedalpushers I'm trying to teach myself that this is a normal way to eat. Yes I agree with your healthy choices. That's why I get so frustrated with myself because I know what's good, what's bad, if my portion is too big etc but I just dive in and eat it and feel awful afterwards. I've been know to cry to my OH about my weight whilst shoving chocolate in my mouth.

I'm really going to give this a go. Me and my OH are in talks of having another child next year (haven't fully decided yet) but I know if we decide to go ahead, my body is in no fit state to be carrying a child and recovering from a c section.

You hear of people shedding loads of weight from diets but I've never really heard of people doing it themselves using their own minds and knowledge so it's been great to hear from you all.

OP posts:

purplebagladylovesgin · 23/04/2021 10:09

Dieting doesn't work. Calorie restrictions don't work.

The only thing that works is to control you body's response to hunger. Once you break this you stop wanting to eat.

Your body can't tell you what's on a packet, it doesn't know if you've eaten a doughnut or a portion of rice. It process all food in exactly the same way. It's what you put in that determines your body's response.

If you eat sugar in the form of fruit (banana and other very sweet fruits), refined grains, pasta, bread, potatoes, corn, sugar, syrups, any of these. The body releases insulin in huge volumes to protect itself. This results in the starch being converted into fat and stored.

Then, once the large amounts of insulin have been deployed to do their job and protect you from damage the sugar in the blood plummets. This signals the hunger hormone because your body now thinks you need to eat again to raise blood sugar..... and the fight goes on.

Once you learn what your body can tolerate, you break this cycle, your body can process what you eat without having to release huge amounts of insulin and you'll not get hungry, the weight really does fall off.

The best way to do this is to buy a glucose monitor. Test before you eat, test two hours later.

If the second number is much higher than the first you've probably eaten too much sugar.

If the second number is much lower than the first you've eaten too much sugar and had a huge insulin response meaning you'll be hungry in an hour.

The numbers need to be the same before eating and after two hours.

It's easy to establish what your body can digest safely and then you can pretty much eat what you like from this personalised list.

I can't eat carrots, but I can eat a very small amount of flour. I can't eat rice, orange juice, potatoes or pizza but I can enjoy celeriac, cauliflower rice, nuts, berries and Christmas cake without the icing or marzipan. I lost 55lbs in 6 months without trying using this method. It's not a diet. It's a way of working out your own personal eating.

It's how diabetics control their blood sugar with or without meds, side affect is weight loss.


LunaMuffinTop · 23/04/2021 10:16

YANBU OP that should work a lot better than any of these fad diets. I have managed to lose 1stone 2LB since December just by drinking water putting veg with my tea eating either chicken or fish every night and by mostly snacking on fruit and salad stuff. I still eat all the other things that I enjoy but I’m losing weight every week. Good luck op.


PurpleDaisies · 23/04/2021 10:25


To be fair.. what you described does sound like a diet to me.. it's just not a fad or a calorie based plan. This way will require willpower and also honesty with yourself about how much you're really eating if you know what I mean. But maybe relaxing your rules around food will be good for you. Give it 6 weeks and see if you've lost any weight! Also, I was stunned to realise how many calories there are in oil, mayo etc so it's worth avoiding those where possible

I agree-if it helps you psychologically to not think of it as a diet, great but essentially you’re planning on eating fewer calories and better foods. That’s the way I lose weight too. Measure carbs and focus on eating lean protein, veg and less junk. Plus add some exercise you enjoy.

You might find it useful to have a week of measuring portions of things so you know what a sensible amount looks like.

Tinuviel · 23/04/2021 11:26

I've been doing pretty much what you're planning ie reducing portions since last August and have lost 1/3 of my body weight! I'm losing about 1lb a week at the moment and am near to my target weight of 9 stone (5.5lb to go). I don't eat breakfast, so I suppose I'm doing intermittent fasting as well.

There's nothing wrong with drinking tea - I drink loads of the stuff - you just need to reduce, then cut out the sugar. After a week you won't miss it.

Lunch is either a late breakfast of home-made muesli or something light: scrambled eggs made with a dollop of butter and some creme fraiche on toast; soup with a piece of toast; mushrooms cooked in a little butter, port and creme fraiche on a piece of toast; mashed avocado on toast with radish salad on the top; cheese on toast (2). The toast is seeded wholemeal and always just 1 slice (apart from cheese on toast).
In the evening I have whatever we're having but a much smaller portion. If I need a snack in the evening, I have 3 brazil nuts as I can nibble them and they make me feel fuller.


Tinuviel · 23/04/2021 11:27

And I agree with Purple Daisies, it isn't a diet (to me that is temporary); this is a lifestyle change. I just wish I'd done it sooner.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Sign up to continue reading

Mumsnet's better when you're logged in. You can customise your experience and access way more features like messaging, watch and hide threads, voting and much more.

Already signed up?