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AIBU?

Not to medically treat my DD

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StayingHere · 18/04/2021 01:56

My DD is 8.5. We are overseas in an Asian country that relies on medical insurance, I think this might be relevant later. This time last year she started showing signs of puberty (a little under arm hair and adult body odor). For reassurance I took her to an endocrinologist who insisted that she had precocious puberty and as soon as she developed signs of Estrogen (ie breast buds) that she should be treated with puberty blockers for a couple of years. Her bone age scan showed 1 yr and 11 months ahead which he said would have an impact on her adult height. I consulted another doctor in the UK via zoom who said her results showed early adrenarche (adrenal hormones setting off a bit early), not precocious puberty and that she is really more likely to be 'just' an early developer - her development is not rapid and shows no signs of the hormone you need to trigger breast development followed by periods a couple of years later. She doubted that her full adult height would be wildly effected even with the advanced bone age. Based on her family history she is unlikely to be a 91st centile adult anyway so we wouldn't expect her to follow that line forever.
A year later and she has no breast buds, she has pretty much the same amount of under arm hair and she has stayed on her growth line. She is happy and healthy and aside from a little spray of deodorant on PE days her life is the same as any other 8 year old girl. The underarm hair is light and no one seems to have ever noticed.
I do not particularly want to treat her even if she does develop breast buds whilst she is still 8 or early end of 9. I am not convinced that puberty blockers are a good thing unless puberty is very precocious (ie 5 or 6) and I understand that there is usually 2 years or so between breast buds and periods which means even if that all started now she would be 10.5 (I was 11 and in primary school and I survived). I also don't think her predicted height of 5'3-5'4 would make her life particularly bad! I was a very tall child and early to my period and topped out at 5'6 which I find totally fine.

I guess I am worried that I am doing her a disservice and I should treat her. Will she resent me if she ends up short or has her period early? Or would she be more likely to resent me if I put her through puberty blocker injections every 2-3 months - I would have hated that. DH falls firmly on the side of not treating her - I very much lean that way too but want to do the right thing by her and not make her childhood difficult.

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ilovepuppies2019 · 18/04/2021 08:08

Puberty beginning at age 8 is still within the normal range although at the very earliest end. I suggest that you have a look at the onset of puberty across different cultures as there are statistically significant differences. This could certainly affect a doctor's perception of normal. Does she need a bra OP? I needed deodorant at age 8 in year 3 and was around the youngest in my class. I started my period at the end of 10 and needed a bra and was again one of the youngest in my class. I'm 1.6 metres which actually makes me taller than my mother and grandmother 😁 I assume that I was always going to be this height. There are developmental consequences of beginning your puberty early but there are also developmental consequences of starting late which I wouldn't overlook either. I'm not a doctor but the medical intervention involves sound substantial for only slightly early development. If she has her period at 10.5 then she'll be a little early but as you can see from the stories here, certainly not abnormally and life alteringly so. I would be very hesitant to expose her to puberty blockers that will have significant consequences simply for being 6 months earlier than most. Good luck in your decision!