To think sometimes you can’t win with the NHS

[Merryoldgoat]

I’m NOT bashing HCPs at ALL.

It’s the conflicting information we get given. It makes us feel confused and utterly defeated at difficult times anyway.

Photos are from a leaflet from the hospital my son was admitted to with croup (steamy room may help) and the NHS web guide to dealing with croup (don’t put in a steamy room).

When I was admitted for my ELCS the midwife asked if I’d shaved. I said no and she got irritated until I showed her the pre-admission notes from the same hospital advising no shaving.

When pregnant the literature from my GP and NHS website had completely opposite information about eating nuts in pregnancy.

When admitted for an operation under GA pre-op assessment asked if I’d eaten or drunk in the last 12 hours. Said I’d had water. Again they started to tell me off until I produced the letter FROM HIM advising me to drink some water prior to admission.

It just leaves me feeling like a twat.

Maybe I’m having a bad week. Very unwell son, autism diagnosis for him and a hard week at work has exhausted me.

I went to a doctor about bleeding between periods and after sex etc. I had already had lots of tests and was advised they had no solution but to go back if it kept happening.

Now at the time I was bigger and it turned into a 20 min moan at me for my weight. She then asked why I wasn't on contraception and basically I was too fat anyways to have a child. Then was asking if my ex husband was fat. She also said I would never get ivf as I would never get the weight off etc.

I did eventually get the weight off and am currently pregnant with my second child however she made me feel like rubbish. Both my children are from my now dh so clearly the fault wasn't just me.

My current gp is beyond useless as well. I have a problem with my right knee and his diagnosis is "housemaids knee" even though I've previously had x rays etc on it and when I last phoned for an appointment for painkillers for it he refused to see me.

@EscapeDragon when I've had foot/ankle injuries from sport my GP at the time told me to go to A&E to get it x-rayed as she was unable to know what the injury was in-depth.

I only went to see the GP to get a letter to suspend my gym membership, as luckily I had access to sports physios. Also due to knowing GPs and other doctors I know most of them know SFA about sports injuries as it's a specialist area.

I fractured my humerus. Got no information or pain killers just a sling and see you in a few weeks. I found an nhs leaflet with my exact fracture which said I should start physio two weeks after injury or I risked permenant stiffness so I did very gently. My week 4 X-ray I mentioned it and they told me it was a terrible idea and I could of damaged myself. I felt like a right idiot so was strict with myself about not moving it at all. Week 8 they asked what physio id been given and how it was going! I never regained full movement and I do wonder if it’s because I missed a window with the physio :(

You are absolutely right OP. I don't want to write an essay about my numerous dealings with the NHS over the last year or so, but let's just say I was diagnosed with a rare type of cancer and I'm glad I did my own reading and research; some of the consultants that were meant to be 'experts' didn't have a bloody clue and I've been told so many different things by people supposedly on the same team.

Oh yes. The meno threads are full of this. New guidance is published at NICE but some GPs haven’t read it. They have a lot to keep up with of course but it’s the inability to say ‘I don’t know, let me find out or pls talk to my colleague who is great on this ’ which is frustrating.

@dontdisturbmenow, I was told by my GP that fasting blood tests are no longer done.

I was referred to the lipid clinic, and the first thing they want? Results from a fasting blood test!

I was also told by a senior physiotherapist that I had no symptoms of a meniscal tear in my knee, but MRI scans showed I definitely did. When she referred me to a consultant about the arthritis in my knee, she'd plainly forgotten to mention the meniscal tear, because he didn't know anything about it and, sure enough, she hadn't mentioned it in her referral letter.

If I hadn't mentioned it, he would have been none the wiser and would have done an operation that only did half the job.

That's human error though, not anything wrong with the NHS in itself.

And in any discipline, professionals will vary in their preferred approach to a problem. I've known builders who'd do the same job in completely different ways, and at work our team often favour different approaches to the same situation. We agree collectively how we'll do stuff though, so that all clients get the same service.

I understand about different approaches but the point is the result is the same.

With the shaving, steam and nuts it’s not.

@Newgirls

Oh yes. The meno threads are full of this. New guidance is published at NICE but some GPs haven’t read it. They have a lot to keep up with of course but it’s the inability to say ‘I don’t know, let me find out or pls talk to my colleague who is great on this ’ which is frustrating.

Do you find though, that women in particular, are singled out the most?

I have had issues with periods since puberty. Had my first at nearly 15 and it went on for 3 weeks. Constant. Not spotting.
I used to get such severe cramps, I would vomit. My mum took me to GP- it's periods. Everyone gets them. What do you want me to do about it?

Solidered on for a year, one period went on for a month. Had time off school constantly. Taken to another GP at the same surgery, same attitude until my mum demanded a referral to gynae.

They put me on the pill. This messed with puberty. Made me very ill. Yet anytime we went back and showed concern they fobbed us off.

In my early 20s, couldn't get pregnant. Was miserable. We went for tests after begging. One of those things apparently.

When I finally got pregnant with DD after 7 years, they found I had severe endometriosis. My uterus and bladder were stuck together. I had terrible PCOS. Nothing was offered though.

At 30, after DS and I nearly died due to negligence and ignorance about my internal issues, where no notes from my previous pregnancy were even glanced at, I asked for a sterilisation. Nope. Not old enough.

Over the last ten years, my PCOS and Endo symptoms have gotten worse. It gets to the stage where I'm in agony twice a month. Feel like I've been hit by a truck, I've got no energy. Nothing works.

Went back at 36 to be told "no record" of my PCOS nor endo, my internal injuries, DS being early as a result. Looked at like I was making it up. Female GP made me cry saying I needed to grow up as all women get periods.

Asked again about sterilisation. Told no.

I'm told I'm fat (I'm 5 foot 8 and a size 18, my weight is all on my middle, caused by PCOS). I get cluster migraine from the hormone imbalance. I have excess hair on my face due to it too. I was told "err, have you never heard of waxing".

I get no help. DP went with me once as I was doubled up in agony. GP said "oh, are you sure you're not pregnant, take a test for me"- DP said how on earth do you get that conclusion. I'm sexually active as I have a partner apparently.
This specific GP you could go with a leg dropping off and she'd say "take a pregnancy test".

I'm literally waiting and praying for menopause. I get no help. Im on a support group for women with PCOS and gynae issues and several as severe as me have had a hysterectomy. Mine won't even entertain that notion.

I just get an eye roll.

It's either we are overweight, underweight, sexually active or being "silly"

I've given up to be honest. I am so worried that my wedding in June will coincide with either ovulation where I swell up two jeans sizes and look 6 months gone for a week, or have my period and will leak everywhere as they're so heavy.

GPs in this country, in my experience, do not give a shit about female healthcare. If costs need cutting, it's women whose care gets cut.

When I was seven weeks pregnant I started bleeding and having mild cramps. I checked on my NHS Trust’s website (Maternity services) which told me I needed to see my GP who will refer me to the EPU. I started to call the practice but it kept ringing out so I went down there to find the receptionist sitting there eating a bag of crisps whilst the phones were ringing out - not sure if she was doing any work, it didn’t look like it from where both DP and I were stood. We explained why I needed to see a GP but she told me GP’s don’t do referrals for that and to go straight to the EPU as it was a walk-in. I asked her why the website was saying different, she wouldn’t check she just shrugged her shoulders and kept saying GP’s don’t do referrals. Off we went to the EPU who were absolutely not a walk-in, refused to see me without a referral as it was on an appointment basis, so we had to go and sit in A&E - even though I absolutely should not have been there they were brilliant with me and so caring and they sorted out my referral although it took a few hours when I could have been at home.

I did miscarry. Once I was better we complained to PALS and I did get an apology but by then I’d changed surgeries. This was about 7 yrs ago now, since then the QCQ have been called into the original surgery and it’s now closed. I could not fault A&E or The EPU it was just the GP practice and the receptionist not checking what I was saying on the website.

• CQC not QCQ 🤦🏻‍♀️

Yes women’s health seems to be over looked and misunderstood too often. Black women are treated even worse by all accounts.

There is research all the time and guidance ever changing and throw in that we are only just really talking about some women’s health concerns it’s not easy is it!

@Tiktokersmiracle yes I agree women get the shitty end of the stick. When I was in hospital last summer another lady on the ward was literally sobbing in pain, kept saying she wanted to see an endo speacilist. The staff were so unsympathetic and tried to fob her off with paracetamol. I think she was discharged and readmitted a couple of times before she finally saw a speacilist. I sometimes wonder how things turned out for her.

Myself, I was sent home despite them seeing blood in my pelvis on an ultrasound scan. Low and behold I was back in hospital 5 weeks later having emergency surgery and blood transfusions. Could have been avoided.

The NHS employs over one million staff. Its a nightmare to try to manage effectively.

I stood on a rusty nail that went right into my sole. Copious amounts of blood and having it so deep I had to pull on it a couple of times to remove.
Rang 111 to be told I must go straight to A&E to asses the wound and have tetanus jab.
Got there, basically told I was being ridiculous for coming to A&E with such a minor injury
I asked about tetanus and I was told "everyone born after X date has had a tetanus so we don't give them anymore" in such a way that you may assume she was talking to a toddler. Well, I've no idea if I've had one actually - my parents were really quite negligent and it wouldn't be a stretch to assume i hadn't.
I was absolutely livid tbh, complete waste of everyone's time and the person I saw in A&E really was a nasty abrupt cow.

It’s the lack of singing from the same hymn sheet that gets me. I wish we could see the same midwife throughout pregnancy, for example. The first one I saw was great, then the second told me I had tested positive for human parvovirus. She asked why I had been given that test, why I had tested positive? I didn’t have a fucking clue. I asked her what human parvovirus was and she said she didn’t know. So I go out into the waiting room after the appointment, Google it and leave in tears because it’s Slapped Cheek Syndrome and it can cause miscarriage.

The first midwife I saw actually noticed me crying as I left the hospital and phoned me. She told me I had tested positive for Slapped Cheek antibodies which meant I had probably had it in childhood and now most likely was immune to it. So good news, obviously.

The next midwife asked me to confirm that I’d had the whooping cough jag, I said no. It turned out that the second midwife should have told me to get it at the last appointment and didn’t. Thankfully I was still able to arrange it at the GP but this third midwife really laid into me about not having had it. So it was then that I complained and, credit to them, was assigned to see nobody but the head midwife for the rest of my pregnancy, and she was brilliant - compassionate, knowledgeable, sensible, treated me like an individual.