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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what your goal salary is?

601 replies

SmokeyApo · 14/04/2021 14:40

Hi all, just being nosey here Grin

I have been thinking a lot about career progression and asking for a raise lately, and that got me thinking about what my goal salary is. As in, the salary that I would like to earn at the peak of my career (let's say between age 40 and 50).

So I will ask: what would your goal salary be?

I won't share mine for now just because I don't want to influence the answers, but I will happily share it later on.

OP posts:
alwayslearningsomethingnew · 16/04/2021 09:13

I understand it's a depressing thread but there's always hope, there's always something you can do to better your situation. Not saying it's easy, but when you can see others are doing it (assuming it's true and many won't be) then there's no reason why you can't.

Xenia · 16/04/2021 09:23

Drunken I don't think you need to worry. Happiness does not hugely co-relate to net salary or assets other than if you are very poor indeed people might suffer from damp housing or be more likely to be obese and sick and die a few years earlier. For most people how happy they are tends to be affected by their brain chemicals and not their income. I certainly prioritise my health over money and in fact working for myself (as a lawyer) from home since 1994 has been a good compromise even tough in the 90s I was expecting to be made a partner which never happened as I can take myself of to bed on time now the children are older (sleep is one of the best things for good health). I don't think my £22k a year food driver son is less happy than his lawyer siblings.

79andnotout · 16/04/2021 09:31

People on higher salaries what do you do?

I run the sales and marketing department in a scientific instrumentation company. I have a science PhD and a couple of postdocs in the relevant industry, and over a decade of sales experience, coupled with good leadership and people skills, and I'm female. This are a rare combo of features in the world of physics and tech! I could earn double my 100k salary at a larger company and I'm continuously being head hunted, but I've taken several pay cuts and moved around to achieve a better work/life balance. I don't have to travel very much these days and I have a lot of say in the company culture as senior management, so that's more important than money. I have never switched off on holiday or even in the evening, though, I am always available, which is expected in global sales, and it's a bit exhausting.

My DP and I try to be quite eco, so we tend to holiday in the UK with our dogs, buy a lot of stuff second hand or good quality things that last, and have a modest house, so our lifestyle is actually quite cheap. The mortgage will be paid off next year and I'm planning on retiring from my career at age 45 as I would rather work part time doing something less stressful as I get older, and I have a chronic health condition that is starting to rear its head. I am a bit worried I wouldn't be able to ramp down mentally - a lot of people I know who left the corporate world struggled to adjust, but I have a lot of hobbies and love pottering so I hope I'd be fine.

Mreggsworth · 16/04/2021 09:36

@cyclingmad part of me believes my life style goals are already met by my salary. I've always had an issue with comparing myself to others maybe its something I should seek therapy for, I'm aware my motivations arent healthy.

Pyewackect · 16/04/2021 09:39

£100K

Heronatemygoldfish · 16/04/2021 09:43

I started on 20k at age 27 post-PhD when the house we live in was 93K (DP was on £28k which is how we got the mortgage). Now it's worth £500k and I'm on £65k and he's on £12k-ish (he went contracting a few years back which is hopeless right now but he's happier!), so though we are comfortable, we'd never have got the mortgage at today's house prices. I am at the peak age (50s).

It's all relative, really. Happiness and health is definitely a better goal. We have a non-leaky roof, a child about to go to a really good senior school and don't have to worry about how much we spend in the supermarket. With luck we'll all survive the current nightmare, and we will still have pensions worth something.

Good luck all.

TravellingSpoon · 16/04/2021 09:54

These threads always go the same wasy and I can see why some people find them depressing. My goal would be to earn enough to be comfortable and not have to worry about spending, or a big expense.

I earn around £19k working 28 hours average a week, including unsociable hours allowance. Its for a Local Authority and I think my manager 2 grades above me only earns about £28k.

But I love the job and the team, and I have a really good pension. It can be quite flexible with shift swaps and I just don't want the stress. Being a LP and having a DS with severe SN, I just want to tick along.

Drunkenmonkey · 16/04/2021 10:12

@xenia that is a good point. I do really believe that happiness comes from within and comes from having a mindset which sees the best in a situation, and a happy outlook which is largely personality driven.
For a while I was doing really well at focussing on my outlook and mindset rather than trying to change my situation and I am not at all materialistic so I don't want more money for myself really.
I think if a thread is depressing we need to think about what emotion is being triggered within us that causes that response and for me it is fear I think.
I've started worrying about getting my kids into a good school to avoid the experience of a terrible school like I had, and also fears about pension and old age (my DH doesn't currently have a pension, and mine wouldn't support us both) and these threads trigger that fear.
But I do agree that money definitely does not buy happiness, and provided a person is comfortable (can afford what you need) then they can be just as happy.

WombatChocolate · 16/04/2021 10:36

Drunken monkey makes a good point about choices in early 20s. A number of people have great A Levels and degrees and from there go in very different directions with different outcomes. Money isn’t everything of course, but some of those people end up in minimum wage jobs and some in high flying careers because of choice they make.

I’ve seen a number of people start with the high flying career. They opted into law or accountancy with top firms on graduate schemes and worked their socks off for a number of years to get qualified and get impressive firms in their CV. Some then continued with this and reached the top of their profession. Others, later used that experience to branch out into key roles in things like charities or the public sector, which perhaps weren’t so well-paid but fitted with their personal ethos more, but which were only achievable because of their early experience in top graduate jobs.

My point is, if possible, it’s good to spend early 20s really pushing forward. There is plenty of time later for kicking back a bit, from a position of strength, if that’s what you want to do. Yes, we all know people too who started off wafting around and only in their 30s retrained or found their role that led to big bucks, but to be honest those are the minority. It’s easier for most to get the professional qualifications in and get into the good training contracts in their early 20s. As childless young people, often single and and flexible, there is the time to work hard without competing demands, which is often so hard once you have children.

Lots of people don’t want to work in the corporate world forever. Some find once they start the lure of the money and promotion means they find it hard to escape and of course lots don’t want to anyway. But those who start there often find it’s a benefit to them through their career, even if they only do if for a few years. The fact they got onto those schemes in the first place speaks volumes about their drive and ability, and the skills they learn there can be useful in all kinds of similar or very different places. Doesn’t have to be corporate, but could be something like Civil Service fast track too.

Realise not everyone can have places on those schemes. However, having a stronger sense of the possible career routes and potentials within different careers, rather than just what can be done at 21, is knowledge that more young people should spend time gathering or their parents guiding them towards. Doors might never totally close, but going through certain doors at 21 means others might open far more easily later. Doors do start to partially close or get more difficult to open fairly quickly and by 30 the broad trajectories for the lives of many (not all) are fairly well established.

theodozya · 16/04/2021 10:39

@WombatChocolate

Drunken monkey makes a good point about choices in early 20s. A number of people have great A Levels and degrees and from there go in very different directions with different outcomes. Money isn’t everything of course, but some of those people end up in minimum wage jobs and some in high flying careers because of choice they make.

I’ve seen a number of people start with the high flying career. They opted into law or accountancy with top firms on graduate schemes and worked their socks off for a number of years to get qualified and get impressive firms in their CV. Some then continued with this and reached the top of their profession. Others, later used that experience to branch out into key roles in things like charities or the public sector, which perhaps weren’t so well-paid but fitted with their personal ethos more, but which were only achievable because of their early experience in top graduate jobs.

My point is, if possible, it’s good to spend early 20s really pushing forward. There is plenty of time later for kicking back a bit, from a position of strength, if that’s what you want to do. Yes, we all know people too who started off wafting around and only in their 30s retrained or found their role that led to big bucks, but to be honest those are the minority. It’s easier for most to get the professional qualifications in and get into the good training contracts in their early 20s. As childless young people, often single and and flexible, there is the time to work hard without competing demands, which is often so hard once you have children.

Lots of people don’t want to work in the corporate world forever. Some find once they start the lure of the money and promotion means they find it hard to escape and of course lots don’t want to anyway. But those who start there often find it’s a benefit to them through their career, even if they only do if for a few years. The fact they got onto those schemes in the first place speaks volumes about their drive and ability, and the skills they learn there can be useful in all kinds of similar or very different places. Doesn’t have to be corporate, but could be something like Civil Service fast track too.

Realise not everyone can have places on those schemes. However, having a stronger sense of the possible career routes and potentials within different careers, rather than just what can be done at 21, is knowledge that more young people should spend time gathering or their parents guiding them towards. Doors might never totally close, but going through certain doors at 21 means others might open far more easily later. Doors do start to partially close or get more difficult to open fairly quickly and by 30 the broad trajectories for the lives of many (not all) are fairly well established.

I think this is a great point and certainly something I’d like to impress on my children. Brilliant post.
shinynewapple21 · 16/04/2021 10:56

I've never had a goal salary, other than to earn enough to pay the bills and to have some left over for things like holidays , days and meals out.

We have always had low outgoings, our house is fairly modest in an inexpensive part of the country so it's not been difficult to do this.

My FTE is about £26,000 but my earnings are pro-rata as I've worked part time since having DS 20 years ago. I have very much prioritised the extra time I've had to be with DS when he was younger , and helping elderly family members more recently. DH has recently taken early retirement but his salary has never been huge , around £35-£40K.

We paid our mortgage off a couple of years ago.

Sekanoro · 16/04/2021 11:01

Oh my god the wages on here!! The majority of high earn more than me and my husband combined!! I’m a nursery nurse and he’s a registrar in Urology in the NHS. Feeling less and less sympathetic for the feminist whinging they don’t get enough money 🙄🙄🙄

Covidconfuse · 16/04/2021 11:06

That’s encouraging to read @GrandPrismatic
I mean it would be depressing to think we had reached our peak in our 40s when we still have perhaps 25 or even 30 years of work still to go!
I am thinking of changing direction slightly and doing a second masters degree in a few years since I am probably only about 1/3 of the way into my working life so I hope my peak is a way off - it feels like early days to me!

Veronika13 · 16/04/2021 11:23

@HalfBrick

Funny how all the super high earners have time to dick about on Mumsnet isn't it? Wink Don't be offended if you're telling the truth, shame on those who aren't Halo
I'm on £79k, my job is very cruisy and I set my own (very relaxed) deadlines. And that's how I can sit on mumsnet. Feel better now? Grin

It's maths heavy and I'm good at it, so I am not apologetic about it.

Veronika13 · 16/04/2021 11:29

@RuleWithAWoodenFoot

How do you all you folk earning near £100k a year have time to post on an internet forum during the working day? What do you do? Are you overpaid?
Consulting (data science), £79k so not 100, but I've been in this field for 6 years only
WombatChocolate · 16/04/2021 11:34

Higher paid earners aren’t working in clock-watching, heavily managed roles. They are trusted and have flexibility in their working. So they might have times where they spend little time working and lots of time in MN and are earning their big salaries. That’s fine. They might also have times when they work crazily hard or face really significant stress. It’s not an even year for many people and certainly not 9-5 with a timed 15 minute tea break and an hour for lunch, for most.

PickleCabbage · 16/04/2021 11:36

@sekanoro the salaries don't mean much if you don't know where in the country people live and their outgoings. Also your comment on feminists 'whinging' - why shouldn't women get the same pay if they are doing the same job as men and bringing in the same results?

JoBrodie · 16/04/2021 11:47

The UK Government has provided funding for additional training, which may be of interest to late teens / early twenties readers, who have not done A levels or equivalents, in ENGLAND - info was published on 1 April 2021.

www.gov.uk/guidance/free-courses-for-jobs

Free courses for jobs
Details of the free courses and qualifications for adults (19+) available through the Lifetime Skills Guarantee including eligibility criteria and how to apply.

As part of the Prime Minister’s Lifetime Skills Guarantee, if you are 19 or over you can now access a course for free. This is part of the government’s Plan for Jobs.

There are 2 options available to you under the Lifetime Skills Guarantee.
• Free level 3 qualifications

  • If you are 19 or over and do not already have a full level 3 qualification (equivalent to an advanced technical certificate or diploma, or A levels) you can now access a free qualification.
•Skills bootcamps
  • Skills bootcamps offer free, flexible courses of up to 16 weeks, an opportunity to build up specialist skills and fast-track to an interview with a local employer.
They are available to you if you are aged 19 or over and are either in work or recently unemployed (some skills bootcamps have additional eligibility criteria).

You can access one of the free level 3 qualifications if you are aged 19 or over and want to achieve your first level 3 qualification, which is equivalent to an advanced technical certificate or diploma, or A levels.

Previously, if you were aged 24 or over, you would have had to pay the course fee for these qualifications. Now, many colleges and training providers have funding available to cover this cost for you.

If you’re 19 to 23 years old you can also access additional qualifications for free. If you’re in this age group, contact your local college or the National Careers Service for further information.

Jo

JeanClaudeVanDammit · 16/04/2021 11:52

Oh my god the wages on here!! The majority of high earn more than me and my husband combined!! I’m a nursery nurse and he’s a registrar in Urology in the NHS. Feeling less and less sympathetic for the feminist whinging they don’t get enough money 🙄🙄🙄

WTF? Some women earning large salaries means that feminists wanting equal pay isn’t legitimate?

MiddleParking · 16/04/2021 12:07

@Sekanoro

Oh my god the wages on here!! The majority of high earn more than me and my husband combined!! I’m a nursery nurse and he’s a registrar in Urology in the NHS. Feeling less and less sympathetic for the feminist whinging they don’t get enough money 🙄🙄🙄
You earn shit money because you work in childcare, which is devalued by society as women’s work. Guess what wanting that to change is called Hmm
Sekanoro · 16/04/2021 12:08

I’m pretty sure the female registrars get the exact same wage as my husband.

Sekanoro · 16/04/2021 12:09

God I knew this would trigger a few 🙄 this is why I never actually post on mums net

cyclingmad · 16/04/2021 12:12

I think young people are given too many misconceptions. There is so much threon at then to enjoy their 20s, go travel, do all the holidays your only be young once and when your older and grt married and have children you sont have that time again etc. Making the right choices and actually emphasis what kind of life you want to have in 20, 20, 30 yrs, what kind of retirement too and what money is needed to achieve that should be more balanced against the go travel and fun stuff.

I do agree with the whole purse your passion etc but that should always be said in the context of what that means in the real world and what life that will give you. Seeing prospectus saying start ranges is all well and good but to a young person that doesn't translate into well this means your probably have to spend a long time saving up for a house etc.

MiddleParking · 16/04/2021 12:19

@Sekanoro

I’m pretty sure the female registrars get the exact same wage as my husband.
Because of feminism Confused
JeanClaudeVanDammit · 16/04/2021 12:21

I’m pretty sure the female registrars get the exact same wage as my husband.

And why do you think that is? Who was it who campaigned for equal pay, again?

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