Keeping a relationship exciting

[Primark872]

Couples who are long-term and/or who live together, how do you keep it fresh and exciting, and keep the spark? Apart from having time apart, which I make sure we have, trying new activities together and making an effort to look nice etc.
Is it inevitable that it will lose the initial excitement? I know every couple can have rough or dull patches, but just don't want to end up more like friends or flatmates. Thanks

Married for 11 years (together for 15). I don’t try to keep it fresh and exciting. It’s familiar and comfortable, because the relationship has mellowed and grown. I think I’d find ‘fresh and exciting’ really tiring.

What is "exciting", though? What purpose does it serve? Exciting is the heady, hormone driven feelings you have at the beginning of a relationship, but "exciting" won't go the distance. I've been married for nearly 25 years, and exciting is not what I want from my marriage. I want comfort, reliability, and calm, and that's what I have. My husband and I still fancy each other enormously, and we both cherish the stability our marriage offers and our life is not in any way boring to us. To me, trying to create excitement just means false fun, chaos and drama. I'll pass.

Maybe excitement was the wrong word. Comfortable is certainly very important too, I suppose I meant ensuring that couples still fancy each other and that it doesn't become stale and boring.

I suppose I meant ensuring that couples still fancy each other and that it doesn't become stale and boring.

It takes effort, consideration, and a determination that you want your marriage to succeed. A happy marriage is no accident. You both have to make a conscious effort to keep the intimacy alive, not just with sex but with conversation, sharing your thoughts, and heading off issues before they become big problems. You have to always, even when angry, treat each other with respect, no matter what. That means no screaming at each other and no name calling, ever.

Bottom line is that you get out of it what you put into it, and it takes both parties to make it work. One person's effort alone is not capable of sustaining a happy, healthy marriage.

32 years together here, 29 married and I still adore him..good luck with never screaming at each other though!!
I'd say accept there are going to be highs and lows, and have clear boundaries! He knows if he cheated I'd leave, end of, and I think he'd be the same. Know each others good and bad points, nobody is perfect.
A bloody good sense of humour is key!
Make time for each other. Our kids are grown up so we have weekends away (or we did pre-covid!), we go for days out, occasional date nights. Spontaneous sex is fun too!