Would you forgive this? Aibu?

[breakingupslowly]

So I’m with a guy who has lied to me in the beginning of our relationship. We’d put things behind us but something didn’t feel right, and so I asked him things about stuff I’d been having doubts about. For example, he used to fawn over naked women on Instagram, both people he knew in real life and “models”. When we made things official, he made me promise that if any guy from my past or anyone in the present messaged me, that I’d tell him. I agreed and asked him to do the same. So now, after pulling it out of him, he’s told me that a girl from Instagram (who is also an ex) and whose pics he’s been liking cos she leaves very little to the imagination, has messaged him a few weeks ago. He’s only told me now because I asked him.

Aibu to end it here? Sorry if this post doesn’t make much sense, I’ve just told him to leave and I’m shaking.

He’s a liar and a hypocrite. Get rid, you can do better.

he made me promise that if any guy from my past or anyone in the present messaged me, that I’d tell him

That’s a massive red flag. Any man who tried that with me wouldn’t see me for dust.

Speaking as one (very silly) person who chose to "overlook" strong evidence of cheating because I didn't want to lose him IT IS NOT worth it. Yes, we married eventually but after two years he left me for an 18 year old! He was 33. Hindsight is great but I should have walked years before we married. Good Luck with what you decide.

It might not feel like it now but you are better off without someone who makes you promise things like telling him who is messaging you.

It just makes me feel sick. I’ve shed so many tears over this man yet he’s the only person who’s brought me happiness over the past god knows how many years

@breakingupslowly

It just makes me feel sick. I’ve shed so many tears over this man yet he’s the only person who’s brought me happiness over the past god knows how many years

read what you just wrote OP.

end it.

@gannett

he made me promise that if any guy from my past or anyone in the present messaged me, that I’d tell him

This is more of a red flag than him following Instagram models. Very controlling and possessive. Straight in the bin for that alone.

I agree. Cheaters/liars project their own behaviour onto others and so make demands like this.

He sounds foul.