Approx two years ago my ex had left and I was living alone. My routine at the time was often to walk my dog of an evening, calling in at the local pub for an hour or so,and then walk home.
One night I'd done this,and got chatting to a man who seemed friendly enough,id not seen him before but he knew people in there (village, most people in there were regulars) we chatted about dogs for a bit,all normal.
Later on, went outside briefly to let my dog have some water,he was there again, spoke to me for a couple of minutes. I'm sure I let it slip that I was living alone as my ex dp had left(silly, I know but everyone in the pub knows me and her anyway and I didn't believe any reason to lie).
Anyway as I go to leave he says he'll walk me home. It's about 3 minutes. I say no thank you, I'm fine to walk home on my own. He persists and I keep saying no. Eventually I set off home and I walk very fast but he pants along behind me still talking. When I get to my door he catches up, barging in behind me saying he just wants to talk,can he come in for a drink etc.
Eventually I get some senses and say I don't want him here, I'm a lesbian and have no interest in him, and order him a taxi to the nearby town he's told me he's from.
He gets annoyed because apparently I've rang the most expensive taxi firm. I say I'm sorry but he needs to leave, and usher him out.
There is a bit more to it in terms of my trying to get him out of my house and I should have been a lot more assertive, in hindsight.
He was a large man, tall/broad and I'm 5'2 and small and it was all quite scary.
When I next went back in the pub I told people.
About a week later he was in the pub of a weekend and came and apologised to me. I told him he knew I was gay so why?!
Fast forward to last week-with restrictions lifted I've got my male 'pub friend' in my garden for drinks/crisps. I'd told friend about this encounter and it comes up in conversation. He tells me that their friendship group all had a go at the guy for this, and threatened to tell his wife.
I'd never known he was married and I am even more annoyed now.
I thought he had done something bad to me,I didn't realise he was also betraying someone.
Would you be annoyed? Would you feel like trying to find a way to tell her? I feel he'll do it again if he hasn't already. I wish I'd have known at the time. It's too late now isn't it?
They may have even broken up now.
YANBU-long time ago now, leave it
YABU-try tell her, she should know.