To not want to go to his grandparents

[Tulipsandrose]

Dh is close with his grandparents which is lovely!! I honestly do love his relationship he has with them, just shows his caring side.

So I'm not disputing that at all. Also i really like his grandparents too they're so sweet.

But.

He goes there alot.... like ALOT few times a week. Both days on weekends sometimes, and sometimes its just a pop in visit but i dont want to go that much.

I don't see my own parents that much. (And they're his grandparents)

Today he wants to go after we just went a couple of days ago and i really cannot be bothered. I said can i just stay back and he said he wants me to come, probably as it may make me look rude for not going i guess?

I just don't feel like i should have to go as much as he does.

Do i sound like a child or is there some sense to this?

‘I’d prefer if you came’?? ‘Er, I’d prefer if I didn’t come, I saw them 2 days ago, I want to stay at home and chill/watch shit telly/do my nails’. Try it, it’s very liberating. If he insists, ask why exactly he requires you to go. They’re his gps, not yours. How often do you see his parents? And yours? Does he come with you? If not, start insisting!

No way would I be going to my DHs gparents that often. You're a saint for doing such regular visits.

As a GP it would drive me mad!

Do they actually want that number of visits?

I like to do what I want, not be constantly hosting visitors

Yanbu. What does he actually do there? I couldn't stand this. If he wants to go then he should. I would go once in a while or on occasions. I honestly do have better things to do.

YANBU. Tell him straight that you don't want to go. He cannot force you and if he throws a strop tell him to grow up. Seriously, a grown man who cannot go and visit his grandparents alone needs to cop himself on. I wouldn't visit my own family that often, let alone Dh's.

I used to get this and I wish I'd stood up for myself more. I had a very demanding job and couldn't get time to get on with preparing for the week ahead and yes, just relaxing - why are we not allowed to just say I want some time off?

No, no, no. Too much. If he wants to see them that much and it’s reciprocated by them, then that’s lovely. To expect you to come along every time? Not reasonable. They are his GPs and it’s his choice to see them so frequently - you shouldn’t have to keep giving up your own free time to do things you don’t really enjoy purely for him. Just decide what will make you happy - once or twice a month, perhaps - and do that. There’s no reason why his wishes (demands?) should continually come before yours.