Nervous about nursery

[Millano]

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Just wanted a few words of advice from all the mums out there who've put their DC in nursery from a relatively young age. My DS is 9 months old, and starts nursery week after next, which is also when I start a new job. I feel sad, guilt, nervous, but also pleased he'll be mixing with children, will be entertained, socialised, have fun etc etc. I'm scared of starting a new job the same day he starts nursery (he does have a 'settling in' few hours next week in preparation), and having to massively compartmentalise all thoughts of my son, and quash all worries, so I can concentrate on work. Argghhh it's consuming me! How did you find it?

My son started at 9 months too. I felt the same, a lot of mum guilt about going back to work (funny how men never seem to get this) but he was absolutely fine. I remember crying on the train into work, where as he apparently didn't stop smiling all day

The settling in days are fab, we did blocks of half days whilst he was getting used to the setting and the people. He's 2.5 now and still absolutely adores going to nursery. From my group of friends he was the youngest to start nursery, and it seems that the older ones have the hardest time adapting. He will be fine :)

My son started at 9 months. He's now 3 and he skips into nursery every day and absolutely loves it. Barely looks back to say bye to me . It wasn't that easy straight away but he settled in pretty quickly and they could definitely entertain him better than I ever could. He's now a very confident child with lots of friends and I'd say he's being very well prepared for school. I actually think it's harder for the parents than it is for the kids!

My daughter started at 8 months and she loves it there. She's 2 now and I don't have a bad word to say about the entire experience so far. The staff are absolutely brilliant and clearly care about the children. I definitely cried for the first week though!

My son has just gone in, 9 months. He had a lovely time. It is very hard but it does get easier. They get to do so much more fun stuff than at home x

My DD1 started at 9 months full time and she loves it. She settled in far quicker than DD2 who started after she turned 1.

My son started at 11 months, just as he was entering a clingy phase. He had a wobbly couple of weeks initially (bursting into tears as soon as he saw the building!) but we just kept reminding ourselves that the nursery staff are experts in this, and they'll know how to help him adjust.

He's 20 months now and loves it there. He's developed so much confidence and his little cheeky personality is really starting to show. He's learned so much at nursery that I definitely couldn't have done with him at home.

In my limited experience they settle so much easier in daycare when under a year. Babies rooms are usually lovely and calm.

My DD started at 9 months. She’s now 3, we have a great bond, she’s really well socialised, adores nursery. In my experience you can tell the children who haven’t been to nursery, they are less advanced.

Mine started 3 days a week at 6 months and now at 2 and a bit still runs in to see her friends and the staff. She loves it and missed it during the various lockdowns. Each morning she asks for her key worker & one of her little pals.

Both of mine started around 9/10 months.
It’s harder for us than it is for them OP. They adjust so, so quickly.
You’ll be amazed how quickly they develop, seeing them with little friends, doing crafts, learning all the songs and stories. It’s lovely.

Honestly your DS will be absolutely fine, nursery workers bloody love the young babies! If it’s anything like my nursery he’ll be spoilt with cuddles and snuggles and the other kids will dote on him.

I had mum guilt too, but you will be absolutely fine and so will your baby. He’ll have a blast doing messy play and with lots of new toys and people to play with. The day will fly by and you’ll soon be together again. Good luck your new job

DD started at ten WEEKS. Pls no judgment- it was a shitty time. She's the most sociable, resilient well bonded child (now 9) i know. She slots effortlessly into social situations and eats well. If you've picked a good nursery your child will thrive

Thank you all so so much for your replies. I really do feel so much better having read your positive experiences. Xx

@omg35

DD started at ten WEEKS. Pls no judgment- it was a shitty time. She's the most sociable, resilient well bonded child (now 9) i know. She slots effortlessly into social situations and eats well. If you've picked a good nursery your child will thrive

Zero judgment. Can't imagine how tough that would have been. Xx

My two went at 7m and then 9m both full time, neither ever really had any issues with being left and as others have said are both very sociable. They always had a great time at nursery. they are much older now, 6 and 4 but despite both being summer borns were ready for school (ds especially who went at 7m) despite only being 4. I think this is definitely because they were used to the busy nursery day and also the prep they got at nursery pre-school.

DS went at 10 months and thrived.
He's now 6 and still talks fondly of his time at nursery.

I think it's absolutely fine as long as it's a good nursery with caring staff. It can be quite distressing at first though, definitely expect a few tears! Mine was actively enjoying herself in the 4th settling in session (looked through the window before picking her up) and went in happy from about session 6. The first couple of sessions are the worst. If possible try to stay with your baby the whole of the first session then half the next, if necessary also a few more.

Mine started at 9 months. Only three days a week but I think he’s have happily done more. He’s now 2.5 and still LOVES going. My nursery doesn’t have an app or send endless updates which is thankfully a godsend as I can’t access it in my day job and also have to compartmentalise. It might be a rough few weeks whilst you both get settled in but persevere. Good luck and enjoy getting back to work!!

In my experience you can tell the children who haven’t been to nursery, they are less advanced.

Don't be ridiculous. Of course you can't and no they aren't.

I had to do this twice. I like to remind myself that they are in a room of "yes", all day long a room designed so they can reach everything they want and do pretty much what they like. I also think of the alternative, if they are home with me, am I really cooking from scratch so many meals?

all the best