Should I sell my house to support DS at Uni and get rid of the mortgage?

[ThatMortgageDilemma]

I am a single mother, my child is going to university this Autumn. Given my salary, I know he will get the full student maintenance loan and extra bursaries but... having worked in the area of Student Finance and looking at the price of rentals in the cities he is likely to move to, I know that won't cover all the expenses even if he gets a part time job.

My mortgage deal is coming to an end so I am dithering between getting another mortgage or selling the house, pay the mortgage and move, mortgage free, to a smaller house. All these options could reduce my monthly expenses so I can support DS while he is at uni.

I am not married to the idea of staying in this area for the foreseeable (I think...). I love the house, it is a very desirable area in walking distance to parks, cafes, restaurants, great schools that I no longer need and the train station. My mortgage payments are relatively small, less than what I would pay for a room in a shared house, but it is a big period house, too big for me and expensive to maintain.

In my circumstances, what would you do?

1. Sell the house, pay the mortgage and buy a smaller house mortgage free in a less desirable area

2. Re mortgage the house for 3 years with an interest only deal while DS is at uni, then go back into a repayment mortgage at the end of the period or go by point 1.

3. Remortgage interest free for 3 years, ask for an extra £10000, change bathroom, boiler and do some repairs which will reduce the expenses the house causes me every year so the money can be used to support DS. Then sell for a higher profit when the mortgage deal comes to an end or go as by point 1.

4. Get another Repayment mortgage deal for 3 years which will reduce the mortgage payments by 15%. Then decide what to do close to the end of term. This obviously doesn't help much to support DS while he is at uni.

Is he anticipating Halls? Or a private rental?

Leave DS to sort out his own student finances. He will.

Realistically, once he leaves for university, the amount of time he spends at your place will decrease year on year. He'll have his own career, make his own place in the world. Your next place is for you (with a guest room).

From your POV, being mortgage free is lifechanging, I'd recommend it. . I would also recommend downsizing to a manageable property that suits your age, lifestyle and capabilities and perhaps your retirement income.. So you need to consider size, AND location. With your fledgeling off the nest you might want to move closer to friends, the sea, theatres, medical provisions, or whatever. You might want a modern penthouse flat with a lift and a view. A small mews house with a sheltered enclosed garden. A groundfloor flat, no stairs. A lock-up-and-leave you can safely leave while enjoying world travel etc.

   Take your time thinking about it; and don't let DS leaving home push you into a rushed decision.

I think you need to be honest.
Yes consider moving if it is what you want. But don't do it to "help out your son" it will lead to either him feeling entitled or resentful that you are pushing this decision (which he may not want) onto him.
Ignore the whole University and Student finance issue and think about what you want.

To be honest I would not make any such change just as he goes to Uni, but deal with the empty nest first and then consider how you want things to change after a year or so.

I think it's important to first address whether you want to move in the next 2-3 years. Sit down and write a list of pros and cons. If the answer is that you definitely would move anyway in the very near future I probably would bring it forward to help with Uni. But I think it's important to make sure it is tucking your boxes too.

I'm in two minds about moving... I absolutely love the house and the area that I'm in, and as I said, it is not costing me that much to have a mortgage to live in it.

But, every time something goes wrong with it, and things go wrong often, it costs me a lot to repair. The mortgage is tiny but the repairs run into the thousands when things go wrong. And that is where the clinch is, old houses and all that. I have spent nearly £20,000 in repairs in the last 4 years (I have almost paid it all back by now), just for the problem to reappear a few months later. It may be that I'm about to sort it permanently and the house would be problem free as it was for the first 15 years I lived in it, but what if it continues?

How about getting a lodger? I think I'd hang onto the house for now. He might need to move back in.

Ds1 has applied to study history - every teacher he has spoken to has told him not to get a pt job - he won't have time!
So I agree with you, depending on course being studied.

For a humanities degree? Really? I went to uni abroad, it was very common to do a PT job alongside studies (in fact, many do post-grad degrees whilst working FT and having families due to needing to pay/borrow up front). In fact, it's quite difficult to secure good employment after finishing a humanities degree without prior employment experience during the course of study. I went to a very good uni, English/History. Worked all the way through and graduated with a first and then walked into a relatively good job with the experience I gained in employment plus studies.

DD is beginning in August. An 'RG' uni. She gained caring qualifications during secondary school and has worked in a care home since she was 16. This has allowed her to gain a very good PT position already (she's 18 in June and starts the position next month).

I think excepting vocational or STEM degrees, even minimal PT employment is very valuable.

Downsizing makes sense if it will reduce your other overheads.

However, Would you have capital left to spare? It is more likely to retain it’s value in property than in your sons pocket or a low interest savings account.

Can you move to a smaller place in the nice area? Friends, nice parks, coups all be important with an empty nest.

The process of buying and selling is also very expensive: Estate Agents, solicitors (separate bills for selling and buying) surveyors, stamp duty, removals... It could take a couple of years in overheads savings to make back your moving costs!

A lodger?

Your son will be fine on full grant and bursaries.

Hmm

I have been in a very similar position OP.

I would sell the house and downsize to a MUCH smaller place in an acceptable area.

If you've got a big period house, could you let out a room or 2 to lodgers to give you a bit more income?

@TristantheTyrannosaurus

How about getting a lodger? I think I'd hang onto the house for now. He might need to move back in.

Ds1 has applied to study history - every teacher he has spoken to has told him not to get a pt job - he won't have time!
So I agree with you, depending on course being studied.

For a humanities degree? Really? I went to uni abroad, it was very common to do a PT job alongside studies (in fact, many do post-grad degrees whilst working FT and having families due to needing to pay/borrow up front). In fact, it's quite difficult to secure good employment after finishing a humanities degree without prior employment experience during the course of study. I went to a very good uni, English/History. Worked all the way through and graduated with a first and then walked into a relatively good job with the experience I gained in employment plus studies.

DD is beginning in August. An 'RG' uni. She gained caring qualifications during secondary school and has worked in a care home since she was 16. This has allowed her to gain a very good PT position already (she's 18 in June and starts the position next month).

I think excepting vocational or STEM degrees, even minimal PT employment is very valuable.

Yes. Really. love the sneering tone about a humanities degree btw And I'll take the views of education professionals (at RG universities) over some mn poster 😁 Ds1 has volunteered in the community since he was 14. I imagine he will continue that during holidays.

I would initially get lodgers because your ds might get a job far away and you might decide to move nearer (but not too near) to where he ends up living.

Laughing that PP thinks history is an example of a degree that would make PT work difficult what degrees do they think would be suitable to have a PT job alongside then? I know a few recent 2:1 and first class history grads who worked during uni without ill effect. When people say not all courses are compatible with PT working they mean courses like medicine or nursing that involve long hours on placements and reduced university holidays, not humanities that involve minimal contact time. (I'm not bashing humanities - I did one, I graduated with a first, having worked approximately10hrs a week during my final year and also volunteered a few hrs a week too. Perfectly doable.)

Okay, lets take DS out of the equation:

• I am surprised to realise I am not as attached to this city as I thought I was. I have called it home for years but now DS is not going to be around, I don't feel the need to stay put. I have no family in the country and most of my friends are expats so we would keep in touch one way or another who ever moves out first.

• If it were not for the repairs costs, it will not make sense at all to move. It is a great house, in a great area and I pay less than £500 a month in mortgage.

• But at the same time, I feel like a need a smaller place. I don't know if it is because DS is moving or not, but I have this desperate urge to have less stuff around me. Travel light and all that. I used to be quite nomadic in nature before DS came along, I literally move from one country to another several times with less stuff than you would fit in a car, so I have stayed put here to give him the stability I didn't have when I was growing up, but I am really itching to start afresh somewhere else even, if my more mature self is telling me not to be stupid.

I can only tell you what ds1 has been advised by both teachers and previous alummni

Which carries more weight with me than what some mn randoms think!
😁

Op...if you want a fresh start go for it.

@MeadowHay not to be flippant but there are big differences from one university to another one, I am aware that neither Cambridge or Oxford allowed their students to work (not sure if that continues).

My friend and I studies similar masters in different universities, what for me was an end of term subject essay for her was her full dissertation. We both graduated with Distinction.

I'm a single parent also quite nomadic by nature and have settled down for the sake of my children. I would go for option 1 but not tell him that it's for him, in case it did lead to either entitlement or resentment as others have said. Then you'll have a fresh start and spare cash to offer should he need it. A part time job alongside studies never did anyone any harm!

If you was my mother, I'd rather you do what's best for YOUR finances and happiness. I got by on student loans and jobs and I'm in London.

It also sounds like YOU want to move, I personally think option 1 sounds good. Mortgage free? Then you would have extra money left over to treat DS now and again!

What has he suggested you do?
My DDs both got minimum loans and we supported them by paying half towards rent, and a small sum monthly to cover food.
You could get a loan for £15k to cover the expenses over 3 years. Tell him he’s got x money off you and he needs to find accommodation to fit the budget.

Sell and buy somewhere smaller. It’s a sellers market right now - I’ve just sold my house after a week on the market. EA hasn’t even had time to put the sign out the front!

Don't do it. Keep hold of the house but it seems like you've already made up your mind about moving and are just looking for reassurance from the MN jury.

You don't need a big house and it's expensive to run so I'd sell and live mortgage free. I probably wouldn't use the equity you release to help pay for his uni though, I'd save it. He should be able to manage, if he does get a bit into debt you can always help him later by clearing it for him (my parents did this) but don't tell him in advance that's the plan or he'll rack up the debts.

I'd downsize to be mortgage free, but not compromise on location in order to have left over cash.

Rather than giving DS a set amount of money I'd save it. If he needs extra money while at uni it's available and you can offer it to him as you see fit.

If he doesn't end up needing it there is always the option to help him with a deposit on a house or similar later in life.

Downsize but don't move to a less desirable area, stay where you are (if you love it) or move to another area but a good one. You might need to use all your capital to do this, but IMO it would be worth it. You won't have a mortgage to pay and if you choose carefully you should hopefully have fewer maintenance costs too. That reduction in outgoings might free up some income to support DS. But really I think supporting him financially should be secondary to getting the home that will meet your needs going forward.

Alternatively, or if you need time to think it over a bit more, you could get a female lodger - someone who works outside the home while you're working - to boost your income.