Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

To feel a little sad its my car that's being sold

50 replies

IliveonCoffee · 07/04/2021 18:43

We've decided to go down to one car (well one car and a motorbike). He's getting a bike, transferring his car to my name, and my car is being sold. The proceeds pay for the bike.

Logically, my car is the oldest, by 6 months and the most miles on it. But I can't help but feel a little sad. It was the first "proper" car I bought, I love driving it. I had every intention to run it till it died (or at least started to "need a new [insert part here]" every time I take it.

His car is technically better - it has a reversing camera, touch screen all that jazz. But it doesn't feel like I chose it, or that its really mine. It will always be his old car.

I just feel a little sad even though I'm happy with the decision....

YABU - get over it...a car is a car
YANBU - you can feel sad for a car. make sure you take it out for a good drive with a coffee before it goes

OP posts:

altiara · 07/04/2021 19:48

Definitely choose the cat! 😂

It’s ok to be sad when practical, sensible decisions don’t match emotional ones.

Cadent · 07/04/2021 19:50

Unless he forcing you to sell your car then you're being very weird and self-indulgent.

Candyfloss99 · 07/04/2021 19:54

You'd be mad to sell your car so he can get a bike. He wants his cake and to eat it too. So in his mind he has a car and a bike and you have none.

Mustreadabook · 07/04/2021 19:57

I get it. We went from 2 to 1 car when we moved in together. My car was the oldest and I sold it for about £200, dispute it working well for me for about 4 years. It was my second car but my first car that I had chosen, a cute little Vauxhall nova. His car then proceeded to blow up 6 weeks later, the cam belt went and it was a write off. At least I got to say I told you so!

Babysharkdododont · 07/04/2021 20:11

Your car is barely run in on 32k miles, keep it

potatopotato1 · 07/04/2021 21:13

YANBU I had to sell my lovely green fiat 500 because I needed something bigger. This was over a year ago and I still think about it every time I get in my current car which is still not big enough and I hate it!

If you don't want to sell it don't!! I regret selling mine so much! Sounds silly but it was my dream car and meant so much to me that I was able to save up and buy it.

Ninkanink · 07/04/2021 21:15

Don’t sell yours. He’ll still think of it as his. Plus you don’t actually want to sell yours! He gets his bike, you get to keep your car.

notdaddycool · 07/04/2021 22:10

Don’t sell both to buy a new one, it’s like chucking a couple of grand in the bin, pick one to keep. How much more would you get for his than yours, how much do you really expect to drive? If you hope for kids and a bigger car in a few years selling his for more cash now and keeping yours until then might make a lot more sense.

pallisers · 07/04/2021 22:12

it is ok to feel sad. I ran my last minivan into the ground and donated it to charity in the end. I felt like an eejit but I cried the day they came to take it away. I had such memories in that car - kids singing, telling stories, hearing about drama at school, driving to matches and parties, squeezing 7 girls into it for end of term pool party, shoe-horning a double-bass in when Emma joined our car pool. I honestly felt like I was sending Ginger to the knackers yard as I thought it would be scrapped. (actually it was sold and I hope some other family got some nice times out of it too)

PicsInRed · 07/04/2021 22:15

Money's on he'll be driving his your car every time you go out together and will often "borrow" it to go out himself.

Effectively, you're selling your car to give him the cash to buy him a nifty new bike, whilst he in practice still keeps his car. Who suggested this?

I would keep your car, OP, and keep your eyes focused very closely on this situation.

Howshouldibehave · 07/04/2021 22:18

How much is each car worth?

CausingChaos2 · 07/04/2021 22:35

32000 miles is nothing! I would definitely not sell your car. He will always see the car you keep as his too.

BashfulClam · 07/04/2021 22:43

Me and sh got rid of our wee crappy car but as it was loaded to be taken away we watched sad saying ‘aw he was a good little guy, took us on ribs of adventures and now going on his own new adventure’ more recently DH handed back his car and it was our ‘wedding car’. So it’s very normal to feel attached.

ReturnfromtheStars · 07/04/2021 22:43

I don't know much about cars but would always choose a Kia over a Peugeot. Plus some cars are very "male" cars and hard to get the settings right for someone shorter. So if the Kia works for you I would keep that.

TokyoSushi · 07/04/2021 22:57

Similar is likely happening in our house as DH is getting a company car, I'm keeping mine!

Gassylady · 07/04/2021 23:15

Another voice saying why not sell the newer his car to get more money and keep the car you chose

tttigress · 07/04/2021 23:19

Can't you just tell him you want to keep the Kia? You might get more for the Peugeot anyway.

But do you really want to keep the Kia, or is it just s twinge if regret that will soon be forgotten once you are driving the Peugeot.

Anyway it is a good move that you are going down to one car.

Topseyt · 07/04/2021 23:23

If you don't want to sell your car then don't.

I certainly wouldn't sell my car so that my DH could get a bike. Fuck that!

Lwoj · 07/04/2021 23:35

Kia has a 7 year warranty, whereas the Peugeot has 3. Non brainer to keep the Kia if you prefer it. The mileage is fine.

StCharlotte · 08/04/2021 07:45

I bought a new Kia recently and had to sacrifice my ancient but much loved car which was worthless to get a £2000 scrappage deal. That little car kept on giving right to the end. I snivelled all the way home from the dealership (whilst also enjoying the Kia's new car smell) and felt like the worst kind of traitor ever.

MeanderingGently · 08/04/2021 07:50

I used to love my cars, they represented my freedom and they were 'part' of me so I can understand.
Personally I would keep the one I wanted to drive the most, or else do as many others have suggested....sell both and buy something you have chosen.

Original poster

IliveonCoffee · 08/04/2021 09:49

I might have confused the mileage a little! We started from a very different point, when we got his. His now has about 32000, and mine has around 80000.

Kia warranty nearly expired. His has a better mpg (trust me his previous obsession with that is a whole other discussion).

While its a money saving exercise, we don't need to, but its good to have a review and a reshuffle. I'm happy I'm not getting the bad end of deal.

While when we go out, he will drive it, but it really won't be a change from it anyway - if anything stops the debate of who's car we went in last.The bike will be his commuting vehicle, unless its not safe weather-wise. If he can't bike, and I need the car, he's aware he will be hanging in car park from when i start at 07.30 and him at 09.00! If he starts leaning towards 'I'll only use the bike when you're using the car' instead of the car being generally available, except when he HAS to use it, then we will return to two cars and he will have to cope with driving whatever the bike sale affords!

@tttigress and @altiara have it right, its the most practical logical decision but its just sad. And once I'm driving the Peugeot, the kia will just be a little twinge of past regret.

OP posts:

Ninkanink · 08/04/2021 09:52

You’re better off selling the car with less mileage to get more money for it, and keeping the one with the higher mileage since you know it’s reliable, plus it’s your car and you don’t want to sell it!

BillMasen · 08/04/2021 09:57

@Candyfloss99

You'd be mad to sell your car so he can get a bike. He wants his cake and to eat it too. So in his mind he has a car and a bike and you have none.

Blimey, that’s totally made up isn’t it??

Some people just have to find a reason it’s all his fault...

BillMasen · 08/04/2021 09:59

I’d say if it’s genuinely a preference then keep yours. If it’s just a bit of emotion ver your first car (not belittling it) then do the sensible thing and sell yours. Only you know which it is

Flip

1 2