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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be having second doubts about child starting mainstream?

43 replies

2021neverends · 04/04/2021 21:12

Child has an EHCP and due to start mainstream in September. School originally said no they can't meet needs. As it was my preference the LA overruled them and now I'm doubting whether that was wise.

He has his review in June but I don't know if its just my anxiety.

He is just developmentally behind.

AIBU to be regretting my choice? What sort of things would indicate mainstream really isn't suitable?

OP posts:

Original poster

2021neverends · 04/04/2021 22:11

@Ellie56 December, he has his review June so I was going to tackle then as I know his preschool are amazing so I haven't needed to worry that they wouldn't meet his needs but school is a whole different ball game.

He talks a lot but has really poor intelligibility, lots of listening and attention issues, very self-directed.

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ittakes2 · 04/04/2021 22:17

Have you asked his preschool what they think is the best option for him? If he has lots of listening and attention issues than I am not sure there will be the support in a main school for someone to redirect him back to concentrate?

Original poster

2021neverends · 04/04/2021 22:23

Preschool said if he gets the correct support then mainstream but without the correct support he will struggle

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Zampa · 04/04/2021 22:29

My daughter moved from a special school to a mainstream school in year 1. It was absolutely the right decision for us. However, we chose a school that was positive about including her and avoided the schools we visited that showed any hint of negativity.

If you have any worries, don't feel bad about changing your mind. You know your child best and are the ultimate advocate.

Ellie56 · 04/04/2021 22:41

If the plan was issued in December you are out of time now to appeal.

But if the review doesn't happen until June you may struggle to get a different school named in time for September, and that's if the LA agrees.

You could try and bring the review forward.

www.ipsea.org.uk/asking-for-an-early-review-of-an-ehc-plan

Kintsuji · 04/04/2021 22:56

@2021neverends

Preschool said if he gets the correct support then mainstream but without the correct support he will struggle

Could you speak to preschool about what specific supports they feel he needs? That might give you a better idea compared to what school is willing to offer if he'll get enough support or not. His sister's experience at the school doesn't sound promising.

JustSaying101 · 04/04/2021 22:56

@2021neverends

Staffing hasn't really been discussed

Perhaps arrange to speak to the school regarding staffing - will they provide 1:1 support for the school day or part of the school day? The school will perhaps need to apply for funding for this.

Original poster

2021neverends · 04/04/2021 23:01

@ellie56 thank you. I will speak to his preschool. I've been really lucky as they are so good.

@Kintsuji they have said he needs support with his speech, his social skills, toileting, his listening and attention and his own safety as he trips and falls a lot. He tends to struggle to engage in things that aren't self-directed. He gets 1-1 there.

@justsaying101 I think they said to the LA funding isn't enough but I wonder if they have managed to get more.

I'm definitely anxious and I can't pinpoint if it's mainstream or just the school itself. Tricky though as my oldest her 1-1s (her ehcp specifies 1-1) have been bloody amazing

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rhowton · 05/04/2021 07:30

You are almost certainly burying your head in the sand. They don't offer special needs school to a child who is "just behind".

BrutusMcDogface · 05/04/2021 07:39

As pps have said, special school places are hard to come by, and you might really struggle to transfer from mainstream if he starts there first of all.

rawlikesushi · 05/04/2021 08:41

If you want a move to special ed now you could call for an early Annual Review, rather than waiting until June.

However, we have a child in the same position - parents requested mainstream in December but have since changed their mind - and all special schools locally are now full for September.

We have had many pupils with profound needs do very well at KS1 - small steps of progress on a personalised timetable, genuine friendships - but the gap has often widened irredeemably by KS2, both academically and socially, and parents then seek a move to special ed. It is hard to say whether they would have been happier if they had been in special ed from the beginning.

rawlikesushi · 05/04/2021 08:45

Meant to add - changing to special ed from mainstream typically takes 1-2 years in our area, and is a lengthy process of proving that mainstream is not meeting needs, and then waiting for a place at a suitable school. It is such a personal decision that it is hard for anyone to advise without knowing your child, but if the school are saying that they can't meet need, and ed psych is noncommittal, then it does sound like something to be seriously considered - getting your child the right education is more important than the logistics imo.

MSQuinn · 05/04/2021 08:53

I have two DS’ with ehcps. Both autistic and have adhd. One has always been in mainstream but will be transferring over to a school with a unit for secondary. Youngest did a year in mainstream and it was horrendous. It ended up in us taking the school to court for disability discrimination. My son ended up traumatised. Both have ft 1:1s. I would say it’s easier to leave a specialist for a mainstream than get into a specialist. Section F is everything! Without it being decent you’re really stuck. Kids can limp along in reception but for my son school were actively excluding him (locking him with his 1:1 in the outside area whilst the kids did lessons was one of the things they did). You could call an emergency review and change the placement. I learnt the hard way don’t send your child to a school who doesn’t want them. The LA will go for the cheapest option, not the best for your child. Same for your DD, if she’s on a PT timetable, I would consider a move.

Lougle · 05/04/2021 08:58

If you wait until June, you are accepting mainstream. That's the reality.

YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake · 05/04/2021 09:59

To be honest, there will not be any special school places left for September, if you haven't got dcs name down for one before Easter you will not get one for the following school year. There just isn't the amount of places for the number of children who need them.

Ellie56 · 05/04/2021 10:18

When is your child 5? Is it possible the preschool would keep him for another term while you sort out the school placement?

BrutusMcDogface · 05/04/2021 12:54

Good idea, Ellie. I know a child who is currently doing a second year in year 6 while she waits for a special secondary placement.

Original poster

2021neverends · 05/04/2021 19:50

@Ellie56 he is 5 in October. Preschool have said they would happily hold on to him but due to age we will need it written into his plan.

First thing I will do after the break is speak to nursery. I've spent all day trying to keep him in one piece, at the very least he needs 1-1 funding and provision secured if he is to stand a chance

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