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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can't do this job anymore

39 replies

Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 14:55

I work with people with autism, and I know it is not their fault, but I'm afraid of some of the service users and I don't feel like I can do this job anymore.
I have been put into a headlock by one boy a while back, and yesterday I was taking another man out for a walk and was punched in the face by him out of the blue.

I have been bitten before too. Don't think I can do this anymore, I'm not saying it's their fault but I'm frightened of working with them. Should I look for other work ?

OP posts:
PearlclutchersInc · 04/04/2021 14:57

Go. You've done your best and that's all you can ask of yourself.

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 14:57

I'm working alone with the man who punched me today and I'm terrified, I can lock my door but I have to make him food etc. So I have to be around him.

OP posts:
Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 14:58

I still want to work in social care, maybe with vulnerable elderly people instead? I can't work in this environment anymore it's too stressful.

OP posts:
SheldonesqueIsAlmostHuman · 04/04/2021 14:58

No job is worth being afraid.

Just because they have difficulties doesn’t mean you should be physically assaulted.

Flowers
Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 14:59

Thank you.
I've worked in high schools with students who were threatening verbally but I've never felt as scared as this.

OP posts:
Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 15:01

In a previous service another client defecated on my clothing, and it didn't happen to me but a colleague had things thrown at his head, they were bitten, scratched etc. A lot.
I salute people who do this as a long term career

OP posts:
SofiaMichelle · 04/04/2021 15:05

Not unreasonable at all, OP.

Go. And don't feel guilty for a moment.

Ilikewinter · 04/04/2021 15:06

Wow OP, it isnt acceptable to be physically absued in any job. Yes I think you should look for something else,

BlueSuffragette · 04/04/2021 15:10

OP your own mental health as well as your physical health is at threat if you stay. Look for another job asap. Do not feel guilty about it at all. Good luck x

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 15:17

Thank you for the support.

I am surprised the company allow female staff to work alone with this client as he's done this before apparently.
I am going to look for something else as indeed it's not acceptable to be assaulted. Nobody should have to live in fear at their workplace.

OP posts:
CorpusCallosum · 04/04/2021 15:18

Oh OP I'm sorry this has happened to you 💐

I was assaulted in a respite service by an autistic service user. It was really traumatic and my employer were totally unsupportive - didn't even do an incident report!

I left that job to work in a local authority social work team with adults and would not be impressed if I reviewed that service now. With your experience you could make a similar move if you wanted, still busy and stressful at times, and you don't build the relationships with clients you might like, but better pay & sociable hours ❤️

LonginesPrime · 04/04/2021 15:21

Are you reporting these incidents to your employer, OP?

What have they done to protect you?

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 15:26

Thanks for the replies, yes we have to fill in a report for all incidents but nothing really happens from them to be honest.
One of my colleagues had go to hospital after being assaulted once.
I am going to look into care for elderly people instead.

OP posts:
SweetToffee · 04/04/2021 15:30

Ask to be moved? It’s a hard hard job . You have to decide if it’s worth it. Perhaps being with different people will help you make the decision

ImAlrightThanx · 04/04/2021 15:31

Just a warning- caring for elderly people with conditions like dementia can be very challenging too- and some can also be very physically strong and aggressive as well.

YANBU to seek new work, but I don't know if elderly care will be any better staffed or resourced.

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 15:34

Yes those are good points.
I don't know what to do anymore, I need to think about it.

OP posts:
PainterInPeril · 04/04/2021 16:08

Was just coming on to say that elderly people can be violent too but @ImAlrightThanx beat me to it. @Painauchocolat189 I don't blame you for wanting to leave. I would have walked out the first time it happened so you're very brave to have gone back in!
Do you definitely want to work with people? Could you change direction completely? The world is your oyster!

1forAll74 · 04/04/2021 16:09

Yes it must be a hard and sometimes scary job to deal with where you work, with sometimes aggressive people, especially if you have to work alone,and have no help from others.. You have experience now,with care work,so take some time to think what other types of care work would be better suited to you.

katy1213 · 04/04/2021 16:14

I couldn't do that. And your employer needs to be stepping up with more protection. Don't be made to feel guilty. There's no way you should be forced to work unsupported with someone who has punched you the day before. If they're short staffed - tough, that shouldn't be your problem.

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 16:16

Thank you. I imagine that dementia patients can be challenging too unfortunately so I should reconsider that.

I think at the least there should be male carers working with this man, and not lone work either.

OP posts:
Steptoeshorse1965 · 04/04/2021 16:16

Sounds as though a change is needed badly by you, not nice surely to be in an environment with people like this, their fault or not, the potential for harm is there and you can do without it. There used to be places for people like this at one time, but the Tories closed them all. You should be looking for something better by the sounds.

dottycat123 · 04/04/2021 16:17

You are paying the price of Social services contracting care agencies who say they can meet the needs of such people and they can't. He should have a risk assessment saying he needs two staff, your employer is not safe guarding you. Don't stay but say you won't be assaulted anymore. Plus don't forget that a diagnosis of anything(learning disability or mental illness) is not an automatic reason that an individual is not accountable for their actions.

trunumber · 04/04/2021 16:18

I think the company are doing a poor job of protecting you.

What about support worker on wards in the NHS?

Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 16:18

I've only just started working with this man too. I was told that he rarely lashes out at people, and then it happens to me almost right away.

OP posts:
Original poster
Painauchocolat189 · 04/04/2021 16:19

Indeed, I shouldn't have to stand for it.
He hit somebody the day before me too apparently looking at the notes.

A lady I worked with previously was always 2 to 1, so not sure why this man isn't.

OP posts: