Do you think my 18 month old DS is autistic? Need opinions please.

[honeybee95]

Probably not the best place but just wanted opinions and there is always high volumes of traffic in aibu.

My DS has just turned 18 months old and I’ve never been concerned about his development, however my sister keeps making comments so I just wanted some outsider opinion.

He is very interactive and expressive, gives me constant eye contact, he will follow where I point, he will point for things he wants. He answers to his name. He will join in with make believe play, he will feed the baby, answer his little phone. Loves the company of other children, he babbles constantly, he currently has around 10 words. I’m not sure if that’s a good amount for his age? He’s always been quite advanced in his physical development. He was practically running at 11 months. He loves physical contact, loves to cuddle and sit with me, gives kisses etc. He loves to play with me and daddy, he will bring toys for us to play all together, such as his track to build for him and then he’ll get his cars to play.

He goes to nursery one day a week currently and they don't have any concerns. He can be quite shy with new people and lots of children overwhelm him, but he will get involved after about 5 minutes.

The last few days, he’s been moving objects from one place to the other. Like his bricks, he’ll move them all out of the basket and onto the sofa and then move them all back. I thought it was just a stage of play all kids discover. If his favourite tv show comes on he will completely zone out to watch, you pause it and he’s back in the room. My sister said these are signs of autism. She keeps making comments constantly about him being autistic and it’s starting to get at me. Are those two things enough? She seems pretty confident. My two younger brothers are autistic and I do know some of the signs to look out for, and I’m obviously more aware he’s at a higher risk because of the family link. Just need some opinions as a worried first time mum. Should I be worried?

[Tored]

My 3 year old son is autistic, he wasn't doing any of the things your boy can at 18 months.

No. I don't think he sounds autistic at all. He sounds like a typical 18 month old.

[BrumBoo]

@Puffalicious

Can we all stop with the 'normal' chat? I find it wholly inappropriate. Neuro-typical (NT) and neuro-diverse (ND) are the standards. My little boy has enough to deal with without being labelled abnormal.

I was going to say the same, but unfortunately AIBU brings out a lot of ignorant language around autism and it's difficult to get through to people at times. Also, saying a child sounds 'normal' at 18 months gives a very false sense of what is 'normal' (nothing much) and if they are developing typically now that autism is less likely later (unfortunately not the case, as my younger one showed).

At the moment, the ops son is developing at the expected milestones from what information is given, and there currently isn't anything that most people would raise an issue with the HV or GP over.

[LadyWhistledown]

@Puffalicious

Can we all stop with the 'normal' chat? I find it wholly inappropriate. Neuro-typical (NT) and neuro-diverse (ND) are the standards. My little boy has enough to deal with without being labelled abnormal.

Totally agree. This is incredibly unhelpful and actually quite hurtful

[Bookworm19]

He sounds absolutely wonderful ❤️😊 (ASD or not)

I have a child with ASD (diagnosed) who's 4 and a another who's a little older than your DS (who I'm absolutely sure is not on the autism spectrum). Your child sounds more like my youngest. Try not too worry. Just enjoy him, he sounds like a treasure 😍

[FlibbertyGiblets]

Puffa I take your point. Many apologies, I was unthinking and careless.

[Swordfish1]

I would say he sounds like a typical 18 month old child and sounds absolutely lovely.

Most 18m olds zone out when watching TV. The blocks things,its nothing.

My 2yo would insist on putting the salt/sauce pot back on the same exact place on the table every single meal time.
Not autistic. Just a 2yo liking the pot in the same place. He doesn't do it now, he is now incredibly messy!

Don't worry, enjoy your son and what will be will be. But honestly he sounds lovely.

[Marmaladeagain]

Enjoy your little boy and limit time with your sister, she sounds tiresome. Perhaps she should so some reflection on what her interfering behaviours might suggest about herself.

It is far too early even for an expert to make a diagnosis - however, if you went along with a list of things you've listed - such as pointing at objects and following with his eye/enjoying pretend play, then a specialist would say it is highly unlikely, but mostly that he's too young.

Wait and see, but enjoy discovering who he is without the tiresome, anxiety ridden observations of your sister.

If you have concerns in time then speak to your GP, leave your sister out of it she doesn't sound helpful at all. He will only be this age for a little while so enjoy it. Bin the sister.

[Soontobe60]

He sounds like every other 18 month old child!! Early children’s play is very repetitive. They will build a brick tower and Knick it down 20 times before they get fed up, line up their cars, focus on a favourite tv show and so on.
Please don’t worry.

[Brieminewine]

Sounds completely normal to me, stop worrying and ignore your sister.

[honeybee95]

I don't know if that matters but he doesn't cry when he hurts himself. He has to really hurt himself to cry. Like he'll bang his head and just carry on and not make a fuss, he might come to me for a cuddle but he doesn't cry.

[Druidlookingidiot]

He sounds absolutely fine @honeybee95

[Woodlandbelle]

Pull away from your sister. To mention it once is OK. Maybe kind if she is genuinely concerned (I don't think it sounds like asd)
But to keep at it and being so high and mighty over it is rude and annoying.

[GladysTheGroovyMule]

From what you’ve said your little boy sounds like a happy, “normal” clever little darling. If you are at all worried talk to your HV ASAP. My son started exhibiting signs at the age your son is. He didn’t have much in common with your boy, put it that way.

What’s your relationship with your sister usually like?

[CorpusCallosum]

Sounds normal to me but I don't really have a clue in kids that young. The moving blocks thing sounds like transportation schema and is v v v normal.

[expectopelargonium]

Ignore your sister.

[Daisychainsandglitter]

I have a DD (6) who's autistic and I'd say there were indications when she was 12 months old although we didn't realise it at the time. Based on what you've said I think your DS sounds like a typical 18 month old to me.

[Mumofsend]

The one is a schema (transporting) and the other is something we all do with a colourful screen in front of us. He sounds spot on.

[cripez]

He might be OP. He also might not. Within a year you'll probably have more of an idea.

[Witchymclovely]

It’s too early to diagnose my lovely.

[Cowbells]

Nothing you describe reminds me of my autistic DS at that age. DS screamed and screamed and screamed. He never slept. He refused to eat. He was often very badly sick. He stiffened when I held him. All these are, apparently classic early signs of autism. He also never learned to crawl properly - another early sign, I was told by the assessor.

[Neolara]

I don't think your DC has any of the classic markers for asd that you would expect to see on a pre-schooler.

[riotlady]

It’s very early so of course there’s always the chance that he could show signs later on, but for now he sounds like a typically developing 18 month old. As others have said, transporting things back and forth is a play schema, DD used to spend ages loading everything into the wash basket and pushing it around the living room!

[cripez]

@Cowbells

Nothing you describe reminds me of my autistic DS at that age. DS screamed and screamed and screamed. He never slept. He refused to eat. He was often very badly sick. He stiffened when I held him. All these are, apparently classic early signs of autism. He also never learned to crawl properly - another early sign, I was told by the assessor.

Mine didn't do any of this and he's autistic.

[Disastermagnet27]

Agree with PP about moving objects around, it's called schema. There are different types too. DS1 (now 9) used to line all his cars up and then push them one by one to see which went the furthest, then he would do it all over again. He was around 18 months to 2 years old when he did this. He's now pretty neuro typical. Has some processing issues but I think this is related to dyslexia which his father has, rather than asd.
In relation to speech, children are very different. DS2 spoke quite alot at that age but DS1 was more physical and walked quicker. He had fewer words at the same age. He's always been the more physically active of my two and is very sporty now.
I am a teacher too, although obviously not qualified to diagnose asd or dyslexia or anything like that. I have worked with many asd children over the years and the spectrum is huge. It may be that he shows some traits, although from what you've said I'd say not. He's still very young to be diagnosed with anything but if you're worried do see your Doctor.
Your DS sounds delightful to me, OP.

[Awalkintime]

Sounds very much like a schema - repetitive behaviour which kids go through to make sense of things. Much like spinning a wheel every day for weeks, kids are learning about rotation and speed through that whereas for us it looks like boring repetitive play and an obsession, we already know about speed and rotation so we don't need to explore it for a long time.