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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want my partner to have fewer Zoom meetings in the garden?

112 replies

Lunificent · 30/03/2021 21:39

Admittedly, we’ve only had one nice day so far this year so this isn’t yet an issue. However, last summer he was often having back to back work meetings in the garden for large parts of the day.
The reason it bothers me mainly is that I feel it’s not fair to the neighbours. He’s not saying anything confidential but it’s loud enough to be heard and it’s not just chit chat. I wouldn’t want to hear it if I was them. I’ve suggested not that he entirely stops doing this, but that if there are going to be many throughout the day, that he is a little more considerate.
His argument is that he is not breaking the law and it’s up to him what he does in his own garden so he will use the garden for work meetings at any time of the day he chooses (obv. He wouldn’t disturb anyone late at night).
So am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Overdueanamechange · 31/03/2021 13:39

Your comment made me laugh @thevicarstroketwice

Overdueanamechange

Let me just put this down on the list of what we aren't allowed to do in our gardens according to mn. Right up there with children not being allowed on trampolines before 10am on weekends.

I feel so sorry with people stuck with neighbours like you, I truly do.
As if lockdown wasn't bad enough.

For disclosure we are probably the quietest on our street. We just have a live and let live attitude, but honestly, please feel sorry for our neighbours for the torrent of silence we inflict on them Grin

CharlotteRose90 · 31/03/2021 13:43

I work from home and do my zoom meetings in the garden when it’s nice. Nothing confidential and I don’t shout or raise my voice. It’s nice out and I have every right to use my garden. If you want a quiet garden move to the country. If people can having music playing or let their kids scream all day then I chat to my colleagues outside.

katy1213 · 31/03/2021 13:48

I'm surprised the neighbours haven't retaliated with their lawn mower.

sausageface · 31/03/2021 13:50

@CharlotteRose90

I work from home and do my zoom meetings in the garden when it’s nice. Nothing confidential and I don’t shout or raise my voice. It’s nice out and I have every right to use my garden. If you want a quiet garden move to the country. If people can having music playing or let their kids scream all day then I chat to my colleagues outside.
I completely agree with this! I'm not sure why work chat is considered any different from any other chat/children playing all day!
jessstan2 · 31/03/2021 13:51

I don't think you are unreasonable if he speaks loudly.

WeekendCEO · 31/03/2021 13:52

I’ve done this, so have my neighbours. I know people on here don’t like trampolines, kids playing too early, kids making noise, footballs etc but this is just talking. Confused I don’t see it any different to talking to your family in the garden. People seem to be so intolerant and the list of unacceptable things to do in your garden is growing by the day. I’m with your husband on this.

thevicarstroketwice · 31/03/2021 13:53

nothing that a loud episode of Pippa Pig on repeat can't sort out Grin

Shoxfordian · 31/03/2021 13:54

You sound like his mum telling him off not his partner

Yabu

CoffeeandCakeEqualsLove · 31/03/2021 13:54

All day every day might be a bit much...but honestly, how is this different than any other use of the garden? Or are we not meant to speak in our gardens at all, by MN standards?

TwoZeroTwoZero · 31/03/2021 13:56

Yabu. It really wouldn't bother me at all. It would just merge in with the rest of the neighbourhood noise that I can hear and just switch off from.

I agree with this:
Wow I'd hate to be neighbours with you lot, how miserable. Throughout lockdown I've loved hearing life in my neighbouring gardens, whether that is people chatting on the phone, music playing, families talking, children playing/shouting. It has reminded me that there is life outside of my own 4 walls. I'm guessing work meetings in the garden isn't going to be a permanent fixture so I really wouldn't be getting worked up about this.

Mn is so weird about how people are meant to use their gardens and is completely different from my rl experiences of every garden I've ever been in.

MarieDelaere · 31/03/2021 14:07

I'd refuse a zoom meeting with someone 'working in their garden' as it's so bloody unprofessional. They might not care about being overheard, but I do. And I don't want to be party to such unprofessional behaviour.

If my neighbour were doing it, I'd not feel obliged to stay quiet myself to 'let them work'. Man, I've got fences to repair, drills to rev up, angles to grind. It's spring time, and last year I think we all stayed quiet and meek out of Lockdown Shock and consideration for our rather stunned communities; but this year it's going to be different.

WeekendCEO · 31/03/2021 14:19

I'd refuse a zoom meeting with someone 'working in their garden' as it's so bloody unprofessional. They might not care about being overheard, but I do. And I don't want to be party to such unprofessional behaviour.

🤣🤣🤣 What?

UrAWizHarry · 31/03/2021 14:30

I've worked outside on a nice day and gasp have even taken phone calls outside.

How is it any different from kids being out in a garden and playing? Or any other activity in a private garden that involves talking/making noise?

Weirdos.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 31/03/2021 14:37

I'd refuse a zoom meeting with someone 'working in their garden' as it's so bloody unprofessional. They might not care about being overheard, but I do. And I don't want to be party to such unprofessional behaviour.

How would you know I was in the garden if I had a background on and it wasn't noisy? I live in a flat and many calls have been interrupted by my upstairs neighbour having visitors, hoovering, going up and down stairs, doors slamming. Surely sitting in the garden is no worse!

MarieDelaere · 31/03/2021 14:37

It's unprofessional to have work meetings overheard by god knows how many strangers.

How is that so difficult to understand?

MarieDelaere · 31/03/2021 14:39

How would you know I was in the garden if I had a background on

That's why professional work environments are asking employees to turn backgrounds off.

UrAWizHarry · 31/03/2021 14:49

@MarieDelaere

It's unprofessional to have work meetings overheard by god knows how many strangers.

How is that so difficult to understand?

Depends really, doesn't it? If the meeting isn't about anything confidential then who cares? If you are in a garden that is big enough to hold a conversation without being overheard, who cares?

I often sit on my balcony to have meetings and.... nobody cares.

drumandthebass · 31/03/2021 14:56

@CuthbertDibbleandGrubb

I also don't understand your comment re burglars?

CoffeeandCakeEqualsLove · 31/03/2021 14:57

@MarieDelaere If it's not a confidential meeting, who cares? What if they had earphones in, so no one would be hearing your side of the conversation?

GoWalkabout · 31/03/2021 14:57

Next time he's in the garden not working or not on a call, go outside with a headset on and pretend to have a loud work call. Do it every time he's trying to enjoy the garden.

CoffeeandCakeEqualsLove · 31/03/2021 15:02

@GoWalkabout

Next time he's in the garden not working or not on a call, go outside with a headset on and pretend to have a loud work call. Do it every time he's trying to enjoy the garden.
Shall I run around laughing in the sprinkler every time my kids aren't playing? Or mow the lawn whenever my neighbour isn't? Show them how rude it is to use their garden...

OP doesn't say that it bothers her because it keeps her from using/enjoying the garden. Just that she thinks it might bother the it neighbours

TheUndoingProject · 31/03/2021 15:03

To be honest I think if it was annoying the neighbours you’d probably know about it. Presumably they would mow the lawn/play music/send their kids out to scream a bit to make their point if it was irritating them.

londonschool · 31/03/2021 15:03

One of my neighbours got the hose out and soaked the noisy neighbours over the fence!

MarieDelaere · 31/03/2021 15:04

I guess it's up to every individual to assess whether or not it's professional.

My opinion is just that - an opinion. It's what the OP asked for.

Maybe it's the nature of my line of work.

You never really know what someone else in the meeting could say, do you?

I feel the same about 'I'm on the train' work phone calls. A lot of them are wildly inappropriate and unprofessional, discussing confidential, private, sensitive information and/or business developments.

Elbels · 31/03/2021 15:10

A neighbour one side took frequent facetime calls in her garden when she was gardening

The other side talk loudly and often have their outdoor Alexa playing radio 2. I can't get angry about either of those things because people are just going about their lives.

I've been sat at the kitchen table for a year now and having the occasional meeting in the garden was a really nice change last year. I'd think pretty dimly of a partner who forbid me from doing it.