AIBU to think that Rita, Sue and Bob Too isn’t a laugh riot of a film?

[StanfordPines]

There was a Facebook post a little while ago about the film Rita, Sue and Bob Too. Lots of people were commenting about what a funny film is was.
I commented that while it is a fantastic film and certainly has a humorous side to it I wouldn’t say it was a funny film. I was told that I was without a sense of humour. I said that I didn’t find a grown man having sex with underage girls to be super funny and was told that that is just how it was then and it was fine.
I deleted my comments and walked away.
I’m the same age as Rita and Sue. It wasn’t how things were then and it wasn’t fine.

AIBU to think that while it is a great film comments like ‘such a funny film’ and ‘you wouldn’t be allowed to make that today’ are just missing the point?

(I know it’s Facebook and I haven’t taken it to heart but was I wrong?)

I never liked the ending, it didn't seem to fit somehow, interesting to see that it wasn't the ending that Andrea Dunbar wrote and she was furious they changed it. I'm not surprised.

And no it's not a comedy. I know it was marketed as such at the time, god knows what they were thinking.

Really sad to hear about the writers own experience and her children’s lives 😩

I watched this film quite a few times from early childhood (too young to be watching it). I was shocked at what happens in the film but I think it gave me warning. Then the film turned into reality for me as quite a few friends were in relationships with middle aged men it was all hush hush but also quite normal? 🤢 I didn’t see the attraction as they were disgusting overweight men in my opinion. Why was this a thing?! I remember being at a sleepover (no adults in the house) when I was 15 with a group of girls and one of them had invited her bloke over he bought us pizza and watched a film with us. He was pushing 40!!!

Just to say, I was 15 in 2001!

It's not just up north. I grew up down south and was at a comprehensive from 1985 - 1990. I knew of several pregnant girls - and not just in the fifth year, one of the girls in my class became pregnant in the 3rd year (i.e. aged 13/14). Girls in my year would boast openly about having sex with their older boyfriends - it was seen as something to be proud of. The word 'virgin' was often used as an insult in those days.

I watched this as a teenager (not sure why my parents thought this was an ok video to rent for family film night but anyway!...) and found it incredibly grim and depressing at the time. I remember that awful Gang Bang song: was it by Black Lace?.. it really shows a seedy side to British culture that yes was very normalised in the 80s and even 90s. I remember being at secondary school in the early 90s and feeling very at the mercy of older men wolf whistling/cat calling etc. It was just seen as ‘the way it was’ and complaining led to eye rolling and accusations of ungratefulness. In some ways things are better now and in others it’s just become internalised. I work with teenagers and the amount of young girls who talk about getting boob jobs and say ‘it’s for me’ without thinking about where the desire for that aesthetic might come from, makes me worry.

As an aside, I hadn’t realised one of the actresses was the one from Happy Valley and Downton though. She’s great.

Same @SweatyBetty20 ,I wasn't far either in Bury ,we had a few girls at my school pregnant in the fifth year ,one had a baby at the end of the third year ,you would have been the same age as my sister as her year was the first year to do GCSES,I was a couple of years younger .

It was never intended to be. But some people are poor at reading things, getting subtext etc. Even when it's not exactly hidden. The types who thing the 'You're gorgeous' is a love song.

I grew up working class but not on a grim council estate, or up north. I lived in a large city down south. There was definitely a lot of 15/16 year olds trying to 'bag' an older boyfriend. We had a number of night clubs, ones where it was fairly easy to get in without I.D , and that's where we would go. We also had a night club where a lot of what we called older women went to ( actual age about 30+) and a lot of the lads went there for what was known as grab a granny night. Attitudes were definitely very different in the 80s

It's such a grim film I mean it's splattered with laughs but once you think about it it's just bleak ! I am there age and I remember girls at school.had older boyfriends with cars and the girls would all pile in after school we at the time it was "grown up" but years on and knowing better it was so wrong, one girl even left school to marry her boyfriend he was in his early 30s

that awful Gang Bang song: was it by Black Lace?

Yes it was - the same group who came up with 80s 'classic' Agadoo. I imagine at the time 'Gang Bang' was viewed as a novelty song, complete with associated dance actions, in the same vein as Agadoo, Do the Conga, The Birdie Song etc.

Have never seen it, so just read the plot. Ugh. It’s horrible.

I was 15 in 1996, and there were quite a few girls I knew that slept with older men. I had a 21 year old boyfriend at that age (wasn’t into much older men though). I hadn’t thought it was abusive at the time. But when I started dating my now husband when we were both 22 he said that he thought it was quite wrong a grown man dating a 15 year old. At that point I started realizing it really was a bit creepy

I never understood the appeal of this film. I found it from. I do however recognise the truth of it. The 80s were shocking when viewed through the lense of current times. I had entirely forgotten Mandy Smith. The whole culture of the time warped my sexuality and propelled me down a path I really don't want for my own DC.

Agree with sweatybetty20, a little bit younger, but about 50% of the girls I went to school with were pregnant before their 16th birthday, most had giben birth before they were out of their teens.
It was also the era of Mandy Smith and Bill Wyman, I mean WTF a 14 year old girl going out with a 50 year old man.

Grim not from

Yy there were at least 3 girls in my year, that I knew of, who were seeing older men. One of them was pregnant by him at 14. He was probably mid 30s, fat, with long greasy hair 🤮
There was another girl going out with a guy called Les, who was fat and bald and just horrifically unattractive (imo).
I could not work out what they liked about these awful guys because to me they just looked like horrible old pervs. I assume now that these girls had been groomed by the older inadequate men 🤮

@Nocar

Agree with sweatybetty20, a little bit younger, but about 50% of the girls I went to school with were pregnant before their 16th birthday, most had giben birth before they were out of their teens. It was also the era of Mandy Smith and Bill Wyman, I mean WTF a 14 year old girl going out with a 50 year old man.

Yy could never work out why bill wyman was allowed to have sex with a 14 year old and hardly anyone seemed to care

I was born in the 80s so didn’t see it til much later when I was a young adult and it was grim as fuck. Great movie but I thought it was meant to be grim- that you were meant to think Bob was a bastard who was grooming 2 teenage girls to want to let him have sex with them. I’m sure that kind of thing did go on back then but I would have thought it wasn’t “just one of those things, get over it” and most parents would go spare at their teenage daughter being treated that way. Rita and Sue didn’t come from homes with parents who cared though if I recall? Bobs character pretty realistic mind you.

*great movie as I recall it being realistic but not the type I want or need to watch more than once.

I think presenting tragedy as comedy is one of the things British cinema excels at. Another poster mentioned East is East, also a lot of Ken Loach films have funny parts in them but they tackle quite dark and gritty subjects.

I was a teenager in the 80s, a Southerner though. Grew up in Wimbledon so vastly middle class Catholic school. Two of my friends left school before GCSEs because they were pregnant and there was one known issue with an older man. They're the ones I knew about, good chance there were others.

As for the film, it's definitely not a comedy. It's funny in places, dark, thought provoking, upsetting and fascinating but not a comedy.

Havent watched it as such ,but a quick google seemed very dark and not funny .Even then a grown man in his 30s sleeping with 2 young girls was not what I or my family would have thought "humourous" at all.

@Respectmyauthoritah

I think presenting tragedy as comedy is one of the things British cinema excels at. Another poster mentioned East is East, also a lot of Ken Loach films have funny parts in them but they tackle quite dark and gritty subjects.

Yes, RSABT very much reminds me of East is East in tone.

@Whatisthisfuckery

The film is funny though, and the girls, and even Bob in his way are endearing. That’s the genius of it though, it portrays something very dark and upsetting in a light and amusing way. Don’t forget this is how it happens, it’s a bit of a laugh, just normal, girls all being grown up, all the time with them not understanding they way they’re being groomed and exploited.

Being all black and white about the film is not helpful, and it’s certainly not what the film was made to achieve. The film is funny and engaging and disturbing and upsetting all at the same time, and for me it’s an amazing piece of film making.

I agree. The people I was talking to were trying to make out it was just bawdy humour in the style of Confessions of a Window Cleaner or the Carry On films.

It has humour and it is a product of its time. But it’s not a laugh a minute comedy.

It’s a dark film with lots of grim but also real funny moments all thrown in the mix. It’s gritty and makes you feel for the characters but there is an uneasy feeling all the way through.

I left school in ‘86, one of my older school mates had a teacher ask her if she wanted a lift home from our local nightclub. It was obvious why he wanted to give her a lift! Can you imagine that now!

I was only talking about this last night with DS but when I left school and certainly in the area I lived, there was no encouragement to go on to higher education, it was go out and earn your keep. Just my experience.

Old and Northern.
It resonated with my experience of the late 70's and early 80's.
Imo the tone is perfect for the time. You did and were expected to laugh off any underage or predatory relationships.
It was a bleak time for WC people.
This is England also hits the mark.