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AIBU?

I saw a woman hit her dog

49 replies

DeadHeadedDaisy · 27/03/2021 20:18

I was about 100 yards from her in a busy high street with my kids. I didn't see what happened but heard her dog barking and when I looked over she thumped it on its side. I heard the thump even from the distance.

I didn't know what to do as had my kids with me, so I zoomed in on my phone and took her picture. WIBU to post the picture on a local FB group to ask if anyone recognises her to suggest she finds a trainer to help her look after her dog better.

The dog seemed fine afterwards but I can't stop thinking about it.

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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

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JesusIsAnyNameFree · 27/03/2021 21:54

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Oh, well if the husband hits you, it's fine if it's just the once so just move on.

You can't compare that and i say that as a pet lover and former dog owner.

I would very much question how much detail person heard and actually saw on close to 100m distance.
I have a feeling it's already on that Facebook group anyway.

Aye, massive pet lover right here.

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SchrodingersImmigrant · 27/03/2021 21:57

But social media is powerful.

That is certainly true. People share pictures to try to identify people all the time. Like... For example like "finding Robert Thompson" ehich resulted in a suicide of the person haunded. Who was not Thompson...

This vigilante behaviour kills.

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Haffiana · 27/03/2021 21:57

I didn't know what to do as had my kids with me, so I zoomed in on my phone and took her picture. WIBU to post the picture on a local FB group to ask if anyone recognises her to suggest she finds a trainer to help her look after her dog better.

So abysmally passive-aggressive. God I HATE posts like that on FB.

Just post:
"I said nothing to her actual face, but I want to virtue signal by inciting everyone else to do what I should have".

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MrsPernicious · 27/03/2021 22:05

I think that if a dog was hit hard enough to be heard from 100m away in a busy high street, the whole town would already know.

Would you like to retell the story a bit more convincingly.

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Unfinished · 27/03/2021 22:18

You didn’t see the full thing, you don’t know the full story, or even exactly what was happening, and the dog didn’t react
Nor from the sounds of it did all these people on the busy high street.
Given you apparently heard it from 100 yards away it must have been incredibly dramatic for those up close, but neither they or the dog reacted?

I think you were more keen to virtue signal than anything here OP.

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Unfinished · 27/03/2021 22:21

@DeadHeadedDaisy

It was a thump on its side. It made a loud, echoey (sp) noise like when you slap your rib cage. It could have been a slap but whatever it was it seemed brutal and shocking. Even more so in a bustling high street.

The FB group has 24,000 members so there is definitely the potential that it will get back to her. It's the only way I can get through to her now, I should have said something in person but I was nervous and wasn't sure what I would achieve. But is it ok to publicly shame someone on FB for what might have been a one off knee jerk reaction? I do not condone that behaviour but could it have serious implications for her personal/ professional life?

I have a dog so I'm finding it upsetting knowing what to do.

No it’s not ok, when you aren’t clear on the facts, and didn’t want to say anything at the time when you could have
And then you throw it to a mob instead.

Just delete the post at least now.

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Cherrysoup · 27/03/2021 22:34

People saying call the police, seriously, to what end? She doesn’t know where the woman lives, they won’t do anything without proof/an address. Such a waste of time. Yes, it’s horrible, but what can she tell the police to ensure they find her? What do you think the police would do, bar politely say yes, we’ll keep an eye out? Pointless unless they catch her in the act.

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DeadHeadedDaisy · 28/03/2021 08:52

Thank you for all the replies.

It was 100 yards, not metres, and I know what I saw but I appreciate that it was only a moment in time. Maybe I should have followed her and her partner for a bit to see how they behaved. I just feel shocked that someone would do that to their dog.

I wish I hadn't been so cowardly. How would you approach someone to talk about it without it becoming aggressive? She was with her partner also.

I had to Google virtue signaling as not heard that before. But I don't understand how posting anonymously on a forum does anything to prove my good nature. I could be a mass murderer for all anyone knew.

I haven't posted anything on FB for all the concerns mentioned on this thread, but at the time i was considering it. I am a part of several dog groups and know that police / RSPCA won't act without more details but I'll get in touch with RSPCA in case she is a known offender.

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LAgeDeRaisin · 28/03/2021 09:23

Maybe the dog bit her and she got a fright- all you saw was the slap. If a dog bit me I would hit it.

If you want to do something call the RSPCA but since you don't know who she is it's a bit pointless. You could give them the photo in case she is known to them.

Posting a rant on SM when you only saw half of the story is completely unacceptable. It could put her or her family in danger and it's not your place to start a mob vendetta.

YABU.

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SchrodingersImmigrant · 28/03/2021 09:37

It was 100 yards, not metres
100 yards is nearly 100 meters... Few meters difference. Not enough though to make a difference in what you can see and hear.

You still haven't answered if the dog yelped or what it's reaction was. Tbh I simply don't think you could hear anything from that distance on a busy street. Pps were right. If the dog was hit with such a strenghts you seem to suggest, it wouldn't just be fine and people closer to them (not nearly half a Westminster bridge away - illustration of distance) would somehow react even if it wasn't saying anything, but just the looks.

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DeadHeadedDaisy · 28/03/2021 10:46

I just remember barking and hearing and seeing the thump, I don't remember if the dog yelped unfortunately. I don't think it really matters to be honest? She shouldn't be hitting her dog. A dog that was on a short lead and not out of control running feral through the high street.

I've seen many people walk past and ignore a human being lying comatose in the middle of this high street, so I wouldn't judge how serious it was on whether other people commented.

Also, I might not be accurate on the distance. I can post a pic with all indentifying features hidden if that would help, but I have already got the answer I needed which is that posting on FB wouldn't be appropriate.

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goldielockdown2 · 28/03/2021 10:49

You said yourself you didn't see what happened. The dog could've tried to bite a passing child.
If your aim is to encourage bad owners to take up dog training, then why not make a post and ask everyone to share? Don't pretend your intentions in posting a photo of her is for anything other than shaming. Don't be a coward, OP.

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FireflyRainbow · 28/03/2021 10:51

Post it op.

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DeadHeadedDaisy · 28/03/2021 10:57

Thinking about it some more I actually think it's possibly worse that I didn't see what happened because that means that I witnessed her hitting her dog after the event, not during it. So afterwards when she has her dog at her side, on a short lead, and more likely that she did it in anger not on impulse.

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nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 28/03/2021 11:06

Police or RSPCA. If you post it on Facebook someone might attack her and two wrongs dont make a right.

Good. Serve her fucking right. I hate people who hurt animals, especially dogs. They are so loyal and even when their owner is hurting them, a lot will never snap back. They just keep forgiving.

Hopefully someone will give her a taste of her own medicine.

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goldielockdown2 · 28/03/2021 11:13

Well if the OP does post in the hope the woman gets a pasting, she might not be the only one to be on the receiving end of one.
Anyone who thinks this is a good idea isn't very wise or is just shit stirring by encouraging her.

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WATSFORTEA · 28/03/2021 11:14

Poor dog. Breaks my heart when animals are abused. Hope she rots in hell!!!

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sunflowersandbuttercups · 28/03/2021 11:20

Please don't post it on social media - what if the wrong person is identified and it ends in a witch hunt?

I really hate this new trend of photographing strangers and putting their photo on the internet for all the world to see. It's so, so easy for things to be misconstrued and for the wrong people to be named and shamed.

Recently a dog walker was caught on camera hitting a dog - someone posted the video to social media. Another company with a similar name was bombarded with reviews and comments calling them animal abusers and worse - they had nothing to do with the original incident.

Once comments and photos are online, it's almost impossible to get rid of them. If you feel this woman has done something wrong, go to the police or the RSPCA. Social media is not the place for this kind of thing.

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Flipflops85 · 28/03/2021 11:25

I wouldn’t post it. You have no proof. If I understand correctly your photo of her face is from after the event and not a video of her attacking her dog.

If she gets verbally or physically attacked on a dog walk, due to your post on Facebook, you could be in a lot of trouble, and you still won’t have any evidence that she did anything wrong.

You say that you’d be posting it on social media, in the hope she’ll get some dog training. This is unlikely to be the outcome. You’d be publicly humiliating her - and regardless of if she deserves it, people don’t learn lessons this way - it’s more likely to cause anger and distress, and back fire in your direction.

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VeganVeal · 28/03/2021 12:17

@DeadHeadedDaisy

Thank you for all the replies.

It was 100 yards, not metres, and I know what I saw but I appreciate that it was only a moment in time. Maybe I should have followed her and her partner for a bit to see how they behaved. I just feel shocked that someone would do that to their dog.

I wish I hadn't been so cowardly. How would you approach someone to talk about it without it becoming aggressive? She was with her partner also.

I had to Google virtue signaling as not heard that before. But I don't understand how posting anonymously on a forum does anything to prove my good nature. I could be a mass murderer for all anyone knew.

I haven't posted anything on FB for all the concerns mentioned on this thread, but at the time i was considering it. I am a part of several dog groups and know that police / RSPCA won't act without more details but I'll get in touch with RSPCA in case she is a known offender.

ha ha 100 yards is 91 metres hardly a massive difference

I agree with others, just because you didnt have the balls to tackle her there and then dont use FB to try to make yourself feel better.

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goodwinter · 28/03/2021 12:38

Please don't post it on FB, vigilante justice is awful and I don't think anything good could come of it.

HOWEVER: there seem to be a lot of dog abuse apologists in this thread and I can only hope they're not dog owners. Hitting a dog, even if it's about to run into the road, or you need to get their attention, or even if it's bitten someone, is not ok.

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MrsPernicious · 28/03/2021 14:09

@goodwinter , nobody knows if the dog was abused. OP is an unreliable witness.

She heard a bark, saw a woman looking like she was thumping a dog 91m away and also heard it. That is not possible.

My dog is as resonant as they get: young, working, deep chested hound. You can hear her being patted 10m away, just.

DH and I experimented this morning (don't worry at tautly upholstered leather chair took the dogs place) you cannot hear a strike, that would knock a Rottweiler off its feet, at 91m.

The woman may or may not have been thumping her dog, we will never know because of OPs embellishment. Other passer-bys would have noticed, and had an involuntary reaction, if the alleged assault has been in any way close to what to what is described.

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DeadHeadedDaisy · 28/03/2021 16:57

Who said anything about a rottweiler or the dog being knocked off its feet? She hit her dog hard and I heard the thump, please don't get bogged down in the detail of distance - I don't need a mumsnet 'detective' to tell me what I saw. There is no reason to make it up?

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MrsMaryClausFace · 28/03/2021 20:43

You heard a thump from nearly 100 metres away on a busy high street?! 100 metres is a fair distance.

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