Insecure and sensitive, want to change

[Wingsofleon]

I like going on hikes and country walks, but I hate it when it's really slippery and swampy. Don't mind a bit of mud but just more of a novice.
I enjoy going on walks with my boyfriend, but he's a lot faster than me and always feel like I'm slowing him down, he always seems to be stopping and turning around to wait for me.
I like having a planned route too or at least an idea of where I'm going whereas he likes to take new routes and just see where we end up.
I think it's just when I was younger I had too many lost on my own in the forest situations.
I also seem to get more tired quickly than him, for instance the other day we had walked for 3 and a half hours straight, I just felt pretty tired and hadn't eaten much that morning. So I didn't want to go any further, I didn't think I was complaining or anything or making a big deal of it just said I'd like to have a break and get some food.
He seemed frustrated that I didn't want to go further.
I think both of us have our own preference and neither is right or wrong.
However seem to get this idea that men love women who are very outdoorsy and love getting covered in mud etc. And very adventurous.
I do think I am adventurous, I just like being sensible and maybe just not as strong.
I noticed he's a bit 'meh" after our last couple of walks. Then yesterday he went alone and came back saying how amazing it was.
I joked that I wasn't there to slow him down and he didn't really say anything, then said I should 'stop complaining' like I had after the 3 hour one.
Don't know why I should care , we're all different, just don't want him to stop enjoying the walks with me or think We're not compatible. It's all about compromise really isn't it?

Had this with an ex too, he clearly wasn't over his ex and would bang on about how they did '20 mile walks and it was their thing' then wouldn't invite me to the Lakes as it was 'too difficult' for me. There are loads of different walks at the Lakes.

Sounds like you aren't comfortable or enjoying these walks or hikes? Maybe better of he does the long treks alone and you both do shorter more manageable walks together?

I enjoy a lot of them but just not the ones where you're skidding through swamps of mud and trying not to fall over, he's fallen over and sprained his wrist yesterday.

But yes maybe it would be better to do that, I don't want to feel like some kind of burden on him or like I'm slowing him down.

Yes I agree with you on the muddy slippy ones ,! Stand up for yourself if you don't want to x

Thanks, I should be firmer indeed and not be afraid to be different.
Just feel like men are always attracted to these 'nature lovers' who aren't afraid to get dirty and love extreme sports etc.

This seems like a lot of angst over a walk.

Just admit you don’t really like it. If you’re starting a relationship with someone outdoorsy by saying ‘yes I love walking ! I really enjoy a big walk!’ Then they think oh great, someone I can share my love of walking with, then you go and after 3 hours (5 miles max?) you’re knackered, they’re going to be a bit confused by it .

I have to admit I am one of those 20 mile hike type people, and if i go out with a friend or whoever and they say ‘yeah let’s do a big walk, like one of the ones you always do!’ So I plan one and then after 6 miles they're starving, need a shop as they’ve not thought to bring a drink or a cereal bar or flapjack, or freezing because they’re in a hoodie with no suitable wet weather gear and it’s raining or whatever it is a bit frustrating , but your boyfriend should know what you enjoy and are capable of and if he wants to then do 30 milers with friends or walking buddies he should go for it but not expect you to enjoy if if you don’t.

Is it falling over etc you’re worried about when it’s muddy? Do you have proper good boots and walking trousers? If you’re going out in wellies and leggings I’m not surprised your hating it it’s awful!