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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

When did your kids learn to swim?

154 replies

Ohdobequiet · 22/03/2021 13:11

I was planning for almost 5 yo dd to start swimming lessons as soon as pools open up again- but have been met with a fair few comments about her being too young.

When did yours learn to swim?
Aibu getting an (almost) 5yo to learn?

OP posts:
littlepattilou · 23/03/2021 19:09

@Workinghardeveryday

I feel like a terrible mum after reading this! I took my eldest dd15 after all her jabs, she was a few months old, then swimming lessons every week when she was old enough - great swimmer. Twins 10 cannot swim. Impossible to take twins alone when they are babies, then when they were old enough due to nursery costs being nearly £100 a day a simply couldn’t afford swimming lessons.

Then life took over, work, juggling housework and a stressful job, 3 kids, cooking, washing etc I just have not had time ☹️.

Now Covid, I am shielding, it does worry me they cannot swim.

You're NOT a terrible mum!!! Flowers

They are only 10, plenty of time to learn. Grin

Swimming pools start opening again soon, so you can book them in for lessons.

When my DD started official lessons aged 5, there were 12 kids in the group. She was one of the 2 youngest. Only her and one other was 5. There were 4 or 5 of them who were in the 8 to 10 age group. So don't worry about them being 10.

Do get them lessons if you can. Smile They're still young so will probably learn fast. You can have some amazing fun when you can swim, and it's good exercise too! Smile

SparkyBlue · 23/03/2021 19:13

I'm going to start again with DD who is 8. She did lots of swimming as a baby and toddler and then for a long while out of seemingly nowhere she hated the water and lost her confidence. I'll also have to start lessons with DD who is 2 as obviously we haven't been able to go for a long time.

scentedgeranium · 23/03/2021 20:58

@Workinghardeveryday

I feel like a terrible mum after reading this! I took my eldest dd15 after all her jabs, she was a few months old, then swimming lessons every week when she was old enough - great swimmer. Twins 10 cannot swim. Impossible to take twins alone when they are babies, then when they were old enough due to nursery costs being nearly £100 a day a simply couldn’t afford swimming lessons.

Then life took over, work, juggling housework and a stressful job, 3 kids, cooking, washing etc I just have not had time ☹️.

Now Covid, I am shielding, it does worry me they cannot swim.

I didn't learn to swim til I was around 15. Parents never took me swimming and somehow school lessons never happened. I ended up teaching myself. In the sea. So dangerous! I am now a confident swimmer having improved hugely after watching some of the techniques used by swim teachers with my own children. I do a pretty steady, strong front crawl and enjoy the water. I am proof that it's never too late!
ChocolateFace · 23/03/2021 22:34

I used to have a theory (based on only my own three DC Grin) that children were ready swim unaided at the same time they were ready to read (blend cvc words). Reading this thread I realise it
may well be nonsense!

Teardrop2021 · 23/03/2021 22:36

scentedgeranium Well done that amazing

LynetteScavo · 23/03/2021 22:58

@scentedgeranium - that's amazing, well done!

Saracen · 23/03/2021 23:06

One of mine learned at three and one at ten.

I would only send them to lessons if they wanted lessons. Does your child want to go to a class?

YerAWizardHarry · 23/03/2021 23:08

Been at lessons since he was 6 months. He’s 8 and swims lengths and is due to start a life guarding course

scentedgeranium · 24/03/2021 06:29

@Teardrop2021and @LynetteScavo don't know about amazing but I was determined! i grew up by the sea and my teenage friends and I had started going to the beach together at weekends and it embarrassed me that I couldn't swim so I literally made myself. It helps that salt water is naturally more buoyant.
Have subsequently seen adults having lessons in pools, which in hindsight would have been a better route!

Wishing14 · 24/03/2021 06:40

This thread is making me feel much better! My boy is nearly four and we haven't had lessons (couldn't afford them - then COVID). I've been typically (mum guilt) anxious about it. But actually he's not yet very confident in pushing himself to do physical activities (such as bike riding) so perhaps waiting a while longer will do no harm and its actually better to wait until he's ready!

BriarsHollow · 24/03/2021 06:49

Four months, when I first put him in. He’s not quite a year and he’s fearless and starting to manoeuvre himself in the water.

louisejxxx · 24/03/2021 06:53

With ds he properly started when he was 4 (he did a few terms as a toddler but then I had dd), dd started at around 18 months old.

Dd has been the much faster learner and more confident, and starting younger definitely helped. By the time she was ds’s age starting she could swim 10 metres, but she is also a naturally more physical child.

stealthbanana · 24/03/2021 06:57

Mine both got into a pool (with me obvs!) at 11 weeks old. DS could swim a length of a residential pool by himself at just past 2. DD is just 2 now and obviously has had v little swimming the past year so isn’t there yet.

The most important thing is to get them comfortable and not scared in the water. Technique wise I think they don’t really get going until 3 as are not strong enough.

5 is deffinitely not to too young, and swimming is a gift for life so good for you!

Usagi12 · 24/03/2021 07:00

It's never too early to teach kids how to be safe around water. I think 5 is late to start lessons.

SeaScape98 · 24/03/2021 07:09

When I was younger my mum took me to the mummy and me classes etc and my dad took me swimming every Sunday. I looked through I while back and saw that I got my 100m badge shortly after I turned 4. BUT I was always water confident and have gone on to lifeguard and become a swimming teacher myself.

As a teacher I have “taught” as young as 3 months with a parent in the water, 2.5 years by themselves. I would say that the most common age for swimming was 3/4 in our beginner classes although we also ran some 6+ so that children were with their own age group and the teaching methods were completely different!

As PP have said water confidence is key to learning to swim - although this can be encouraged in lessons it is much easier if they already like the water!

Another important thing to think about is how much other stuff they are doing. We got a lot of parents who joined the September the child turned 4/5 and had also signed them up to dance, football and gymnastics. The poor children were so tired and wouldn’t learn as much/would cry and act out.

pinkyboots1 · 24/03/2021 07:12

Oldest was 6 and loved it but youngest was 14.. she tried and tried but just couldn't get the hang of it. I had to take a different approach with her and then all of a sudden she could It! I'd definitely try them out on it ASAP

Frazzled2207 · 24/03/2021 07:14

@Saracen

One of mine learned at three and one at ten.

I would only send them to lessons if they wanted lessons. Does your child want to go to a class?

I disagree. It’s an important life skill.

My husband was never taken to lessons but at high school was essentially forced to learn when all of his classmates could already do it. He absolutely hated it and won’t go anywhere near water to this day.

Dee1975 · 24/03/2021 07:16

DD1 started at 8 weeks. DD2 did a stint of baby swimming but I couldn’t keep it up (due to childcare of DD1). Once they were tall enough for lessons (I think 3?) in a normal pool they both went and did every week until lockdown.
5 is definitely NOT to young!

L1saVanderpumpsRose · 24/03/2021 07:22

This thread is making me feel better! I used to take DD, who is now 4, when she was a baby. But then I was pregnant and then Covid hit. I worry so much about her not having learnt to swim and can't wait until pools open so I can start taking her and start lessons.

Throwntothewolves · 24/03/2021 07:28

I took mine at 6 months for both of us to gain confidence. I love swimming but the idea of taking my baby into water was terrifying. He started proper lessons at 4.5 which is as early as the local pool offer them without parent support in the pool. He was making good progress but the lockdowns have killed that.

Your DD is not too young at all, book her in for lessons

wendz86 · 24/03/2021 07:34

Mine both started lessons at 3. I would say my eldest could swim at around 5/6 without any arm bands etc. Youngest (almost 6) has had a lot of disruption in lessons so can't swim alone yet but i'm hoping she will pick up again quick when she goes back.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 24/03/2021 08:04

@Compoundinginterest, we had similar with a dd1 at just 3 - by then she was like a baby dolphin.
Arrived at a large hotel pool, she ran straight to the diving board at the deep end - you’ve never seen anyone move so fast as the lifeguard who raced the length of the pool to save her, poor bloke. He was there almost before we could yell, ‘It’s OK!’

YonderTweek · 24/03/2021 12:46

I'm majorly into swimming but it hadn't occurred to me that I should take my son to swimming lessons yet, and he's 4. Grin Tbf I learnt to swim in a lake and only ever have swum in lakes, so swimming pools seem a bit alien to me. I was hoping to take my son to Finland this summer and teach him there, but Covid happened so that's not going to happen now. Maybe I will pluck up the courage to take him to the local leisure centre for a splash. He loves water but I can see him being a bit timid about going to a swimming pool, so I guess I'll have to keep dropping it into our little chats to get him used to the idea.

BiBabbles · 24/03/2021 13:48

YANBU to do lessons at 5. There is a wide range of abilities and personalities that affect how well lessons go, but just on age, it isn't too young. It also isn't automatically "late" either - there are some limits on a few things without it, but that's not the same thing.

DS1 was in the pool young, did the ducklings thing and had lessons from about 4-5. He's 16 now, hasn't swum in years, not sure of his current ability as he has no interest in it but he says he's 'not much of a swimmer'.

DD1 was in the pool young, did the ducklings thing, and decided at about 4-5 that any water she could be submerged in was trying to possess her, would cling onto the nearest person with surprisingly strong limbs and continued to be that way for years. Bath times were fun /s. It took her being 12 and getting a leaflet from the school that said only students who could swim could go on the cool trip before her father and I could teach her how to not freak out in the water, float a bit, and be confident to swim on her back to the side from the middle of our local family pool with it's "non swimmer' section. She started to enjoy it to the point she was saying it's her favourite sporty thing when pools were closed last year. We'll get back to it when we can.

DD2 was in the pool young once, when her skin reacted badly (she's had eczema since less than a week old, in the pool I could literally see the reaction) and we were advised to wait longer. Then she started to get skin infections all the time and we were advised not to take her into a pool, the sea/anything similar because of the raised risks, she had to have medicine in her baths and had to wear coveralls pretty much 24/7 because at times it could over 2/3rds of her. This obviously made it harder for her siblings to swim too. She was about 9 the next time she was in a pool, but she has to lotion well before and rinse and re-lotion well just afterwards. She can doggy paddle and dive down happily, do a bit of floating but isn't much for staying still.

I used to feel guilty as others describe, that I must have done something wrong for DD1 to be so upset and how was I going to keep them all safe when I got some very good advice - swimming is just one of many life skills, water safety can and should be taught separate from swimming & knowing our limitations and what we can and can't do about them & making choices on that are important life skills too and an important part of water safety when we have way too many young people getting hurt and worse from jumping in the reservoir or the river overconfident that their ability to swim will keep them safe.

nolongersurprised · 24/03/2021 21:19

My husband was never taken to lessons but at high school was essentially forced to learn when all of his classmates could already do it. He absolutely hated it and won’t go anywhere near water to this day.

The PE teacher at my children’s school watches the junior school children swim in the school pool. If he feels they’re not safe in the water he writes letters to the parents telling them that, with lists of swim schools (there are loads here).

It’s borderline negligent children not being able to swim here though - coastal Australia, hot, nearly everyone has a swimming pool. When it’s warm every time your child plays at a friend’s house they’ll jump in the pool.

Most children here aren’t like little fish because of lessons though, it’s because they’ve been in pools since they were babies and spend most of the summer holidays in one. Consistent time in the water - without floaties - is important too

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