AIBU to think my 20 girl should not have to modify her behaviour to avoid violent behaviour and sexual Lang from other children?

[HelplessProcrastinator]

My DD goes to a park very near the house with school friends. One of them has a house overlooking the park and parents keep an eye out for them. The girls keep getting harassed and physically pushed about by a group of boys. Mostly two 10 year old but they have older friends. After an incident today we are going to have to stop the girls going there without a parent being right on top of them. The boys have no fear of consequences. Worryingly they only attack girls and the language from one in particular is highly sexualised. I only found out from the other parent today how bad it was after my DD was pulled to the ground by two of them. The other parent has already contacted the school, police and SS. Her DD has been bullied in school as well. I hadn’t realised how bad it was. I think my DD was playing it down as she loves her new independence and knew I would stop her going.

What do I do? If we challenge the boys we risk getting into trouble ourselves. The girls should not have to stop going out and having fun at 10 because of this awful behaviour.

Title should have read 10 year old

Police.

Stop going to the park for a bit. They will get bored and go elsewhere I expect. Or as you say have some adult presence.

Sounds like the parent who witnessed it has reported it appropriately.

Find out where they live and speak to the parents?

If the police have been made aware I would hope that they will pay a visit to the parents and it will be resolved that way, but as awful as it sounds, I wouldn’t be able to send my daughter to the park until I knew they weren’t an issue any more.

I’m truly horrified to read this and feel awful for you, your daughter and everyone else involved. It disgusts me that kids are being raised this way.

I’d want to know that police and social care were properly looking into the matter.

If this is an ongoing issue with a particular group of children in a particular place then there should be a proper response to address it.

I really hope your DD was ok after being pulled to the ground. Must have been very scary. Of course she shouldn’t have to modify her behaviour to be safe but unfortunately I wouldn’t be overly confident that the situation was going to dealt with immediately. Things like this seems to have to escalate before there is a proper response.

The police haven’t been made aware today. My DD’s friend’s parent’s have tried it recently but the police have done nothing. Apparently mum turns him first thing in the morning and refuses to answer the door when people go round to complain about him. I’m going to ‘log it with 101’ and talk to school on Monday.

I feel really sad that it’s the good kids who end up modifying their behaviour and missing out. My DD needs the exercise that extended playing in the park brings. I don’t have time to supervise her for as long as she would like to be out.

If your child has been physically assaulted, report it to the police as an assault and push them to press charges. At the very least, that might encourage them to go and have a stern word with the parents.

Police again a highly sexualised boy of this age is a red flag, what's going on in his life?? Is he being abused

Mum only at home. From the sounds of things he has fended for himself and found some older boys to hang around with. It is frightening that children are using use misogynistic, sexual language.

@HelplessProcrastinator

The police haven’t been made aware today. My DD’s friend’s parent’s have tried it recently but the police have done nothing. Apparently mum turns him first thing in the morning and refuses to answer the door when people go round to complain about him. I’m going to ‘log it with 101’ and talk to school on Monday.

I feel really sad that it’s the good kids who end up modifying their behaviour and missing out. My DD needs the exercise that extended playing in the park brings. I don’t have time to supervise her for as long as she would like to be out.

In our area there is a multiagency hub where this could be discussed. There was an issue with sexually abusive behaviour from a group of children/young people in a specific park in our area. I think the police started having a greater presence in the area, visited some of the holes of the people in the group and Social care worked with some of the children involved.

Basically if there is a genera issues with a group of kids and/or a particular area I would expect not just a response to the individual incident but a wider response to address the wider risk posed by that group in that area.

Police. Police. Police. Keep going on with the police. Don't approach the boys yourselves.
Make a summary of everything that has gone on up to now and go to the police. Then keep following up.

How awful. Sorry OP. Yes you won’t get far without SS and the Police...

And the school. If they are under the same HT, report it as a concern so that if it escalates, which I hope it won't, the school and primed.

Police. The age of criminality is ten so let’s hope the little bastards are caught, suitably punished and amend their behaviour before it’s too late.