AIBU?
To ask you to share your funny stories of petty and harmless revenge
JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 20/03/2021 10:23
I was thinking of this when reading another thread today.
When I was at Uni I lived with two other women in a house share. The bedrooms were tiny and no room for TVs but it didn't matter as we all watched the soaps together in the living room every night.
After a year or so one of the girls - let's call her Becky - was starting to grate a little on me and the other flatmate. Things like taking an hour in the only bathroom in a morning doing things like make up that could be done in her bedroom. Leaving wet towels on the bathroom floor and not squeejying (sp) the shower partition (the bathroom was gross and would get mould if we didn't), washing 3 tops at a time (bills weren't included in rent) then not taking them out the machine for a full day and going mental if me and our other flat mate did to put ours in, leaving lights on constantly, forgetting to lock the front door etc.
Then Becky got a boyfriend, who would come round EVERY night and sit with us while we watched TV. Which ruined the dynamic, but was also annoying because he'd moan about the soaps and TV we watched. He was Portuguese and was awful about "English girls". Would see Kat Slater on the TV and say "see this is how Portuguese men see English girls. As fat tarts, this is why we only want English girls for sex, so ugly and loud" etc. Becky was English and would sit simpering saying "oh isn't he funny" 
apparently he lived with his his parents and didn't want to take Becky to his house until they were serious (she saw him every fucking night for 2 months). He'd also be rude about our decor, our possessions, the food we ate, everything. Then they would have LOUD sex - our other flatmate shared a partition wall with them and used to often come and get in with me to get away from the noise 
we did raise the issues with Becky but she didn't want to hear it, accused us of jealousy
Until one night when me and the other flatmate had stayed in and they went out on a night out. In that time we said it was time to ask Becky to leave or find our own place. They came back at midnight and he was SO rude because we were watching big brother. We were stupid, thick English girls (my friend was Scottish, which is apparently 'the same') and no man would ever love us when we spend our nights slobbing about the living room being unfeminine. Becky again just simpered and giggled then they went off to have the world's loudest sex. We decided enough was enough and it was payback time. We put Branston pickle in his shoes and his jacket pockets the next morning he went MENTAL. I'll never forget the squidge noise his foot made when he put it in his shoe and Branston pickle flopped out. He then noticed his pockets and started screaming about how we owed him £400 (his jacket from from George at Asda, we checked) and we are disgusting English girls. We just laughed our heads off as he waved his pickled hands about Becky actually cried, packed a bag and declared she was moving in with him. Fine by us. She came the next day for the rest of her stuff and handed her notice in with the landlord who let her end the tenancy straight away. A week later, she called us to say it hadn't worked out with the boyfriend and she was coming back. Sorry Becky, but your room's already been rented out by a lovely English girl
CCC11 · 20/03/2021 11:52
My mum who I am no contact with put MY house up on gumtree for sale (didn't ask her to and I obviously had no idea) out of spite for me cutting her out of my life. She said used goods were apart of the sale in the description. She advertised my house for $150k when it's really over $500k so I had over 100 messages but only had 2 people show up to my home and they were very sorry about what happened when I told them the story.
So I put her for sale on gumtree with her phone number saying she was in used condition. She got lots of dick pics and men messaging her. Not my finest hour but surely made me feel better for a minute.
RagzReturnsRebooted · 20/03/2021 12:11
When I was 18 - found out my boyfriend (31) had snogged someone outside the pub. For some reason I decided she was the target for revenge, spied a dead mouse on the pavement and wrapped it nicely and posted it through her letterbox 
Unsurprisingly, he dumped me for being immature...
I do have some class these days, honestly!
Remembering39862 · 20/03/2021 12:31
When I was in halls at uni, I started dating a guy from my corridor. One night, a big group of us (including him) were hanging out in the kitchen before getting ready for a night out. The girls were chatting about clothes, and I said “I have no idea what I’m going to wear yet”.
In a really derogatory way, he snapped back “it doesn’t matter, it’s not like you need to impress anyone”. Because obviously women only dress nicely to attract a man, and since I already “had” one, I should wear a shapeless sack. Well, I saw red.
I intentionally wore the tightest, shortest dress I owned, and spent the night largely ignoring him to dance with my friends. When we got home, he walked me to my door, and - hoping to get his leg over without having to actually apologise - said “you looked really beautiful tonight”.
I replied “I know” and shut the door in his stunned face! So petty but it felt great
RagzReturnsRebooted · 20/03/2021 12:36
@Remembering39862
In a really derogatory way, he snapped back “it doesn’t matter, it’s not like you need to impress anyone”. Because obviously women only dress nicely to attract a man, and since I already “had” one, I should wear a shapeless sack. Well, I saw red.
I intentionally wore the tightest, shortest dress I owned, and spent the night largely ignoring him to dance with my friends. When we got home, he walked me to my door, and - hoping to get his leg over without having to actually apologise - said “you looked really beautiful tonight”.
I replied “I know” and shut the door in his stunned face! So petty but it felt great
That wins.
RLJ1905 · 20/03/2021 15:07
@CCC11
So I put her for sale on gumtree with her phone number saying she was in used condition. She got lots of dick pics and men messaging her. Not my finest hour but surely made me feel better for a minute.
This is brilliant🤣
olympicsrock · 20/03/2021 15:44
My father left my lovely mother for a woman who had been a friend of the family that my siblings and I called ‘The Trout ‘ or trout face . They behaved really really badly. A year later his way of telling his kids he had moved was to copy us into his new contact details with his whole address book.
I signed up a Mrs Trisha Rout aka T. rout to all sorts of junk mail (rat infestation, stair lifts, any products aimed at the elderly). I ticked all the boxes saying she welcomed phone calls etc ans was happy for her details to be passed onto other companies. No charities of course. Apparantly It pissed them off for years to come home to a pile of mail addressed to Trout.
MaisyMary77 · 20/03/2021 15:55
Not sure if this qualifies as a revenge story....
About 25 years ago I lived in a small block of flats with DD1. The woman on the top floor kept having really loud, all night parties. Drove everyone crazy and the police wouldn’t do anything.
One night I’d had enough and snuck into the bin shed and turned her electric off, (we all had a universal key for our flat consumer units or whatever they are! Not entirely sure) she didn’t think to check the meter thingy and we had blissful silence for the rest of the night. I turned her electric back on at 8am and like to think she was rather rudely awakened by the noise. After that, whenever she decided to party after 1am, I’d turn off her electric. She never did work out what was going on.
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