To ask what’s your 7 year age gap been like between kids?

[ShutUpAlex]

Currently pregnant with second baby, my daughter turns 7 this year.

What’s this age gap like? She’s going to be a fantastic older sister but I do worry she’s going to feel pushed as I obviously will have to focus on the baby quite a bit. How much did you let them be involved so they didn’t feel left out? She’s fed babies before their bottles and helped with bath times etc. I feel like it will be easier as she doesn’t require the same sort of parenting as a toddler would etc.

I don’t have any practical comments but came onto say I know two sisters with a 7 year gap who are absolutely best friends (now mid 20s/early 30s) - so that bodes well anyway -

6.5 between my two. I wouldn't say that ds1 felt pushed out at all but we were careful to both spend time with him without ds2.

The fact that he was at school made a big difference I think as it built a natural structure to the week and lots of time where he could get away from the newborn - I 'd say ds1's life didnt really change all that much!

The age gap does mean that a lot of the time it's like having two onlies as they're at v different stages and also have v different interests, but they love each other a lot. Ds1 now walks ds2 home from school some days and we're nearly at the stage where he'll be able to babysit occasionally at which point we'll be living the dream

My sister had 8 year gaps between her three. One downside is she has spent 16 years watching kids television!

Agree with all sleepyhead said. Ours worked out really well. Only tricky bit was family days out where is was sometimes hard to do a day out that suited everyone. But we were strict that you couldn’t spoil the other one’s day with a bad mood...eg bigger one has to try and enjoy Peppa Pig World without stropping and little one can’t tantrum round Harry Potter tour. If they tried hard at this then always a nice treat later for the one who’s had to be patient all day.

I have a 6.5 year gap. They are now 23 (DD) and 17 (DS) and still get on really well. They fought a bit when DD was a teen, but generally always been close.

I let her help as much as she wanted when he was a baby, but also made sure she still got one to one time. I don't think she felt pushed out, she was happy to have a little brother.

Yes, and also some really good grown up treats for the older one from time to time eg go out for a meal or cinema and small one stray home with babysitter.

And another thing, when older one does babysit then they get paid properly.

My grandmother has a sister 16 years her senior. They always got on well and she spoke very fondly of her.

7 years between my sisters. They didn't have much to do with each other until my youngest sister was 11 or 12. I'm ten years older than the youngest and was like a third parent until she was 11 or 12. We've been like equals or friends since youngest was a teen.

I have big age gaps between my siblings and we are not close at all. But then our age gaps are huge! 18 and 27 years!

I've got 2 with a 6 year age gap, its been fine ,the older one was always willing to help out with the baby if need be at that age they are more than willing and capable of holding a bottle or rocking the baby in a bouncer, you will be fine op

I’m 7 years older than my brother although there is another sibling in between, but we have always been close.

I personally like that gap, I remember him being born, holding him for the first time, and I would help my mum feed him and change his nappy so I’ve always felt very protective and caring of him.

I have an 8 year age gap - youngest only 7 weeks so can’t yet say how it’ll work out! So far it has been lovely, DS adores his younger sister and I spend time with him while she sleeps. It worked out well that he wasn’t at school for her first few weeks as he didn’t feel pushed out. I think for sure it’ll be a different relationship to the “best buddies” (best case scenario!) relationships I see with small age gaps but that’s ok and I think it can be lovely in its own way. It helps that’s she’s (so far!) quite a relaxed and easy baby.

Ah these are lovely stories Thankyou!

I have a 7 year gap between my 2. Although the youngest is only 18 months it has worked well so far. Older dd enjoys helping out and absolutely adores her younger brother. I was initially worried she'd be jealous because it was just her for so long but she has been fine

I have a DS 15 and DD 22. They are and have always been very close.

DD adored him from the moment he arrived!

DD doesn’t live at home now but she’s quite close by. DS goes to her flat (out of lockdown). They go into town together sometimes if DS wants to buy clothes. They both game so sometimes are online together and they like the same kinds of films.

I was really concerned that DD would struggle having been an only child for a relatively long time but it couldn’t have worked out better! We went through a short phase when DD was about 13 when she got very opinionated about how we parented DS but I think that’s not unusual for the oldest thinking the youngest has it so much easier!

My 2 are almost exactly 7 years and it’s going well so far. They are almost 4 and almost 11 and play together at this point. The absolutely adore each other most of the time. It does have some logistical challenges sometimes finding activities that everyone enjoys, but over all we like it. We know a few other families with the same age youngers and olders and one of them always calls the 7 year gap the best kept secret.

I have a 7 year gap with my younger sister. We’ve always been pretty close and still are. I think in some ways we got the best of both worlds - each got lots of attention when little like an only child - but also got to have a sibling. I think we maybe have a more chilled relationship as not so much rivalry because of the gap.

The step kids have 6 years between them and it’s pretty rubbish. They’re also opposite sex which doesn’t help. When they were younger we couldn’t take them to the same films, if we took them to an activity one was always bored and they just don’t have a lot in common. Those are just a few examples. My sister and I have 20 months between us which I think is a lovely gap as we always had a lot in common and when we were kids it was easy for our parents to take us out as we liked doing similar things.

I found the age gap really easy at first.

Eldest at school all day, and also has after school activities, playdates etc - so lots of time to spend 1-1 with the baby.

DD enjoyed having me around more when I was on Mat leave. She didn't really show any jealousy, was helpful, and old enough to wait 5 minutes if she needed me but I was busy with the baby

It got harder when DD went to secondary school and DS started primary (same year). The age gap seemed really big, and their interests seemed v different - hard to find stuff they both liked to do.

It seems to be getting easier again now DS is a bit older and less childish and annoying, DD can appreciate his sense of humour and their interests are beginning to merge.

DD1 turned 7 a few months after DD2 was born. They adore each other. DD2 (nearly 6m) lights up when she sees her big sister and DD1 loves making DD2 laugh.

DD1 has cuddles and helps with nappy changes and choosing outfits. Sometimes we ask her to talk to DD2 and help keep her calm whilst we make a bottle or go to the toilet. She’s a great big sister. She also understands that sometimes she’ll have to wait whilst we sort the baby but we’ll always sort her too. She can just be more patient.