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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I can train myself to not be a light sleeper?

26 replies

SunFlowerRose · 17/03/2021 20:31

I have always been a really light sleeper. Added to this I struggle to sleep anywhere other than my own bed, alone.

This means if I go on holiday or stay at a hotel I get barely any sleep.

I’m now in a relationship and either have to not stay over, or sleep in his spare room. Otherwise I lie away all night unable to sleep.

How can I train myself to be able to share a bed? To not be kept awake by gentle breathing or movement?

I’ve had the idea of playing white noise when I go to bed in my own bed, alone, in hopes to train myself to fall asleep to the noise.

Because then if I play it at his house my body will sleep. Right?

I’m really hoping to hear some positive stories with this..

OP posts:
MaMaD1990 · 17/03/2021 20:34

I'm much like you, would wake at a pin dropping. It took me ages to fall asleep comfortably with my partner - but I love spending time with him so my sleep was trumped by that haha. I go to sleep listening to ASMR to take my mind off everything in real life to help me fall asleep and stay asleep. Could be a good option for you?

SunFlowerRose · 17/03/2021 20:35

Sorry I don’t know what ASMR is so I’m off to google!!

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MaMaD1990 · 17/03/2021 20:37

Oh it's lovely if it works for you - there some very strange ones out there mind! I like to listen to southernasmr (neighbourhood gossip videos) and anything true crime. It's not for everyone but worth a mention!

LondonUnited · 17/03/2021 20:38

I was exactly like this pre kids. What helped for me was some really good earplugs. Those screen out most noises and I found when I wasn’t listening for noises it was much easier to settle.

SunFlowerRose · 17/03/2021 20:41

Oh no I don’t like ASMR now I’ve listened to it haha. I’ve found a nice running river sound that seems nice though.

I did try ear plugs but then it was as though I couldn’t turn my brain off. I’m hoping if I concentrate on a noise it may help? Still super frustrating though.

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MaMaD1990 · 17/03/2021 20:43

Haha yes it's definitely a particular taste! I. Sure on YouTube there are lots of 8hr+ videos of waves and rain etc. Good luck! I hope you get some good sleep whatever you decide!

Wallywobbles · 17/03/2021 21:20

Ear plugs work for us. Really changes life/sleep. I like the softest 3M ones.

TwoZeroTwoZero · 17/03/2021 21:30

I have a Bluetooth sleeping mask with built in headphones. Through them I listen to wind and rain on a window on YouTube and after a while I don't notice it and just fall asleep. It stops me hearing dh snoring, breathing or clicking in his sleep and also means that I don't wake up with the light. Being built-in Bluetooth headphones means that they're comfy with no annoying wires and the speakers sit over rather than in my ears; also, dh doesn't have to listen to my rainstorm!

Pollypudding · 17/03/2021 21:32

The Rain Rain app is good.

Hankunamatata · 17/03/2021 21:56

Foam earplugs.

meecrowahvay · 17/03/2021 21:57

I'm a terrible sleeper and have to have either sleephones or noise cancelling headphones playing a boring (or rather, not too interesting) audiobook (I use audible and set the sleep timer). It's the only way I can sleep!

Regretsy · 17/03/2021 22:21

Find a partner who’s happy to sleep separately, that’s how I did it! I used to stress myself out worrying about how I would ever sleep in the same bed as someone else but it’s really not a big deal not to. Me and DP both prefer it now and feel it’s helped the relationship in general. I’ve always been a terrible sleeper and have tried everything bar hypnotherapy which I’d love to do. The cylindrical foam boots own earplugs are the best.

Isolatedizzy · 17/03/2021 22:54

I used some of the HeadSpace sleep casts to help my sleep. They always start with a wind down session, so now I know how to use these. They work for afternoon naps, getting back to sleep if I wake up in the middle of the night or at the weekends when I get up and give the cat his breakfast at 6:30 AM. I am now a much better sleeper.

minipie · 17/03/2021 22:57

Foam earplugs here too. I sleep on my side and use an earplug only on the non pillow side - if I use one in both I just hear my own pulse really loudly

MeadowHay · 17/03/2021 22:59

I'm a bad sleeper and a very light sleeper, it all got even worse once I was pregnant particularly as for some inexplicable reason DH started snoring then. I wear ear plugs a lot and usually sleep a lot better with them in. I also always wear an eye mask as I'm very light sensitive too. But no I have never been able to make myself a heavier sleeper I wish I could!

Mowly75 · 17/03/2021 22:59

Don’t bother as a PP said. I’m a v light sleeper & I don’t ever want to share a bed with anyone again! Separate bedrooms also work for us. I still wear earplugs thanks to the bastard cats though

Blankscreen · 17/03/2021 23:03

I have a Google home hub and play white noise all night it has literally Changed my life.

When I put it on now it puts me into a trance like state and I can sleep.

Dh is also now converted

Caramelsmadfuzzytail · 17/03/2021 23:03

I listen to either babbling brook, rain on a tin roof or amazon rainforest. These are apps from alexa. I cant use earplugs. There are also white noise, pink noise and brown noise apps.
I find that refocusing my ears to those sounds gets easier the more you do it.

Ringshanks · 17/03/2021 23:06

I enjoy listening to radio comedies (bbc sounds) through earphones to help me sleep . I’ve effectively sleep trained myself as now I only get as far as the intro music and I nod off! Failing this there are sleep visualisation patterns you can use that are very good

Homehaircuts · 17/03/2021 23:12

The only time I'm a light sleeper is when I need a new pillow or I'm using a pillow I don't like. I spend ages thinking about pillows when I need a new one. It can be the best or worse night sleep depending on the pillow.

RandomMess · 17/03/2021 23:14

I'm nearly 50 and still a light sleeper 🤦🏼‍♀️ 2 piriton at sleep time help a little.

RandomMess · 17/03/2021 23:17

I sleep alone in a pitch black room as soon as someone else in the house gets up I'm awake. Worst is if I get woken up shortly after falling asleep.

Was recently in hospital stayed awake for 40 hours straight at which point they gave me sleeping tablets so I got a whole 6 hours.

rosiejaune · 18/03/2021 00:45

White noise might be bad for your hearing (may trigger or worsen tinnitus), as your brain comes to expect it and tries to tune it out.

If you were going to do that, it might be better to pick something you would hear naturally, with similar qualities, like a previous poster suggested rain noises.

DramaAlpaca · 18/03/2021 00:50

Earplugs. I started using then when I first had nocturnal teenagers.

SunFlowerRose · 18/03/2021 06:11

It seems quite common doesn’t it.

I tried an hour of rain noise last night and then gave up and turned it off. Will try again tonight.

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