Ds2 hit a dog with a stone (accident)

[TheLost]

I’ve attempted a diagram as it’s hard to explain. At the beach yesterday after school. Ds1 was quite upset about some school stuff so I was sat at the top of the beach chatting to him. Ds2 went to practice skimming stones. It was pretty high tide so he wasn’t far away, probably about 20m.

It’s a really long beach but for some reason a woman started throwing a stick for her dog along the shoreline and directly in front of where ds2 was skimming stones. The first time she very nearly hit ds2 with the stick so I called him and told him to move further down the beach out of the way which he did. Woman then decided to move further down the beach too, threw the stick again directly in front of ds2 who was at that moment skimming a stone which hit her dog.

Dog yelps and runs back to owner and owner starts marching over to ds2 to tell him off. I get there first, ask if dog is ok (he seems to be) and ask her why she followed Ds along the beach when he was clearly trying to get out of her way. She claims she was walking along the beach in the direction ds2 moved so it made sense that she carried on that way. I say ‘well no harm done, thankfully the beaches are still quite quiet at the moment so plenty of room to skim stones, throw sticks etc as long as you’re aware of others’. So telling ds2 to be aware of others but not telling him off as I didn’t think he’d done anything wrong.

Woman then launches into a rant about how dogs are only allowed on the beaches for a few more weeks which is disgraceful when I let my child attack innocent animals, it’s no wonder society is the way it is when parents are too frightened to tell their kids off when they’re in the wrong etc. etc. I just said again “well, no harm done. We’d best get going” and left her to it as she’d cornered another dog walker to complain to about my feral child.

Should I have told him off? I’m perfectly happy for him to skim stones on a quiet beach with no swimmers or others around him. My mum said I should have at least apologised to the woman for upsetting her but in my opinion she upset herself. There was no need at all to throw a stick directly in front of ds2, there was a whole free beach.

She sounds quite irrational. She should take responsibility and have noticed he was skimming stones and worked around him if she was so concerned about her little precious.

A skimmed stone to her noggin would have shut her the floof up..
Imo.
An apology was more than sufficient..
*ddog owner here..

I have a dog. Sadly we are not near a beach, but if we were, I would make sure we kept out of the way of children skimming stones. So she is being very unreasonable

The woman is a loon and your mum is wrong and YANBU .

I don’t think you or your DS did anything wrong. Maybe you could have added a ‘sorry’ to your ‘no harm done’ comment but I don’t think it was really his fault.

Her problem. She sounds like an idiot. She chose to put her dog directly in the path of a child throwing stones what did she think was going to happen!
When i walk my dog i continually assess around me 360° so im not caught unawares by any potential dangers or hazards or assaults to me or my dog.
Take no notice of her she probably just felt stupid for being so dozy x

You handled the situation perfectly. Frankly the dog owner was an idiot, don't give her anymore head space.

As a child or dog owner, you have to be situational aware on behalf of your child/dog.

You were, she wasn't and therefore caused the incident.

I do gym in the park with a PT at the moment, and my PT is conscientious about where he arranges our exercises, and I'm a responsible, adult human! (Mostly!)

I have a dog and I wouldn't have reacted as she did. I throw sticks/balls for my dog on the beach and I make sure I do it as far from others as possible (even pre covid). Why did she not just walk past your DS and carry on throwing the stick once past him?

Sounds like one of those people that likes to create a bit of drama and be aggrieved.

As a dog owner myself, it enrages me when I’m in a space with my dog and another dog owner starts coming over with clear intent to invade the space! We have a caravan at the seaside and when we take our dog to the beach we try and find a quiet spot as he can be quite over the top with other dogs. But no we always get one oblivious person walking straight towards us with their dog, when the beach is miles long! I’m not saying we own any part of the beach but sometimes it just doesn’t make any sense to be anywhere near us when the beach is massive 😂 Your son was doing nothing wrong, if my dog was playing near you he’d probably be running after the stones your son was throwing!

If I saw your child was throwing stones, I would give you a wide berth with my dogs so that he doesn’t accidentally clip them

She sounds like she was spoiling for a fight

Yanbu

I love dogs but no, your son was in no way in the wrong. To be honest, I've come across aggressive dog owners on beaches before, a minority can be real arseholes about their dogs entitlement to be on beaches without thought for others.

I wouldn't have been nearly as polite as you. Definitely NBU.

Aren't dogs supposed to be on leads under lockdown rules? That used to be the rule at one point, not sure if that's still the case. If her dog pounced up at someone, she'd have to get closer than 2 meters to pull him back, which I thought was the reason for that rule. Therefore, she's in the wrong.

From gov website

"When walking your dog in areas used by other people, you should consider putting your dog on a lead to ensure you can stay 2 metres away from others."

www.gov.uk/guidance/coronavirus-covid-19-advice-for-people-with-animals#dog-walking

Not a bad idea to have a chat with your child about how we need to check whats around before we throw stuff (because thats a useful life lesson).

But then evidently the dog lady couldn't do exactly that whilst throwing sticks for her dog... so opportunity for another lesson on how sometimes, grown ups are absolute idiots and we have to be prepared for that too!

I can't see that your son did anything wrong, the woman is putting her dog in danger - by throwing sticks*, by throwing them across the path of other people/in the direction of other people, by not being aware of what others in her general area are doing.

*Sticks can land in the sand, sharp end sticking out, and impale a dog in the mouth/throat/chest. If you have to throw something throw a dog toy designed for that.

We had almost the opposite happen yesterday - a child threw a ball for their dog using one of those throwing things and hit my toddler! Their mum was mortified but it was clearly an accident as it shot off in an unexpected direction. Sometimes these things just happen (in our case) but it sounds like in your case the other person concerned could have done with being more aware of her surroundings.

No you shouldn't have told him off. It's her own fault - you already told DS to move down. She was being an idiot. I don't live near a beach but when my dog is off lead I call him back to heel when other people are around - I don't know why she didn't do the same until she'd gone past your DS and then resumed her stick throwing.

YANBU and I would’ve stopped her mid rant, probably not very politely lol.

Owner of 3 dogs and 1DS 🙂

Sounds to me like she's done that deliberately, created a drama so that she can go home and make an outraged post on Facebook for attention probably.

You were right not to tell your son off.
Woman is an idiot. She put her dog between the sea and the stone by following him along the shoreline. She is at fault.
Obviously I’m glad the dog is ok but she’s an irresponsible owner.

I agree - you were absolutely right to not tell your child off. He didn't deserve to be, at all. (Am also a dog owner).
Sounds lovely, to live near the beach, and hope your DS1 is tackling the school issue x

It was an accident 🤷🏾‍♀️

No, you shouldn’t have told him off. I might have said “we are sorry your dog got hit” just to be polite, not because he was responsible for it.

I have experienced something similar. I was on the beach with a friend and my son who was maybe 3. He was throwing pebbles into the sea. The beach was pretty empty and a woman and her dog came down to where my son was and told him off that he would hurt her dog. He didn’t really speak at that age so just looked at her so she shouted again. It was clear that he was with us as there was no one around. I told her she was being very rude and had the whole beach to go to and she eventually left saying children were a disgrace w d how I was an unfit parent! We have a dog and my son does not throw stones at them. Some people are just weird