Does my friend no longer like me or am I being a bad friend?

[Lucy9426]

So myself and friend have been friends for 6 years. Met through work and have had such a good relationship. When her partner walked out on her I was straight over to her house and was there for her chatting and listening to her.
Then she met her new partner and me and my husband get on well with him as well. We’ve bought his daughter birthday presents and socialised with them loads.
I fell pregnant 2 years ago and this is when things started to change. When I was pregnant she said she’d like to start trying for a baby. Gave her a fertility book I was reading. Her partner gave my husband a dad book for him to read.
I feel I was supportive to her. She had periods all over the place and at the end of last year we’ve found out she had some fertility problems and they are heading towards IVF. I made it clear that I didn’t know how to help but if she wanted me to do anything I’d be there, also whenever she wants a chat to call or text and I’ll be there to listen. Which she had been doing.

Last year they got engaged and she has asked our mutual friend to be her only bridesmaid - I was upset about this - BUT - I never once made it known to her. I congratulated her on arranging her wedding party and said how exciting it must be to get underway with planning etc. I don’t think she would have any idea that at the time I was a bit upset. Now I do feel it’s nice to just go and enjoy a wedding rather than being a part of one.
Since that happened, her communication with me have gone quiet. I’ve looked back at messages and it’s always me messaging her first, asking how things are with her. I’ve since fallen pregnant for a second time, I messaged to tell her as she’s had her fertility problems I didn’t want her to find out from someone else, I also messaged when I knew she was at home so if she was upset she’d be able to deal with those emotions.
She said she was okay and congratulated me/us. But since then communication is practically nil.
To the point I’ve stopped initiating communication because I can’t be bothered.

So I’ve come on to the brutally honest AIBU thread. Have I done something wrong? Or does she just not like me anymore?

You're taking it too personal, op. I don't think this is about you at all.
I think being friends with you at the moment could be too painful for your friend. Infertility is extremely difficult and some people need to shut others out in order to survive day to day.
I had a MMC after getting pregnant naturally then after 2 and a half years of nothing, we were diagnosed with secondary infertility due to problems with my DH. Those years were horrendous and although you want more than anything to he happy for your friends, sometimes it's incredibly difficult when all you want is to get pregnant and have your baby, and can't. You have to watch everyone around you fall pregnant easily.

I know it doesn't seem fair to you either but it sounds to me like you haven't done anything wrong and instead, your friend is just struggling right now with your pregnancies and her fertility difficulties

Some friends are there for a reason
Some friends are there for a season
Some friends are there for a lifetime

You have had your season with this friend. It is not your fault, you are just in a different place now.

It is hard if you thought she was a lifetime one

"She said she was okay and congratulated me/us. But since then communication is practically nil.
To the point I’ve stopped initiating communication because I can’t be bothered."

Good that you've stopped contacting her. You've left it nicely but clearly she has her own shit to deal with. It's not about liking you or not. She's moved on to other friends to protect her feelings, things are still amicable but best to accept the friendship as you knew it is over. Your life has changed a lot too. Maybe you'll reconnect when things are different, maybe not. But stay sanguine and don't bring likes/dislikes/bad friend narratives into play.

Thank you everyone. I think you’ve all kind of voiced what I thought had happened. Clearly the relationship has run its course and I just need to accept that.