To hate - I was today years old

[clpsmum]

This phrase is everywhere and it's driving me insane.

You were not today years old when you found out 😡 you found out today

Does this annoy anyone else or am I just turning j to the grumpy old woman I was born to be? Are there any other words or phrases drive you insane??

@FrankButchersDickieBow

Yanbu. I hate that too.

I hate 'I'm dead', when someone posts something the reader finds amusing. I just instantly think, what a wanker.

"I'm crying" is another one.

Yes, it is a silly phrase. Don’t think much of those who use it.

It's not supposed to make perfect sense, it's meant to be a lighthearted way of saying 'I didn't know until today.' 🙄

@Borntohula

It's not supposed to make perfect sense, it's meant to be a lighthearted way of saying 'I didn't know until today.' 🙄

Lots of expressions are lighthearted but still make sense, though.

I loathe it when someone posts a picture of themselves and someone else with a caption like, 'Having coffee with this one.' As if this is the human you selected from your collection for today.

Fuck off immediately.

I've never come across this before, but it makes no logical sense whatsoever. If you break it down it's actually saying "I was the 17th of March 2021 years old when I found it..." which is clearly nonsense.

It will pass, though. When I think of the phrases I used in the 2000s, how many are still used?
"Back in the day"
"Chill your beans"
"Having a jolly"
"Insert [word] here"
"It's all a bit lastminute/confused dot com"

What's irritated me over about the last 5 years is the muddling of nouns, verbs and adjectives. Such as "You are a lol", "He is a small", "I'm sexying all over the place", "I magic wanded it", "You really heroed the beef" (I'm looking at you, Masterchef Australia)

Stop verbing nouns!

Never heard it before, but it’s totally nonsensical. Perhaps if you’re 15 you might get away with it, but at 40 you sound like a total idiot if you start trying to use the phrase of the day. Hate it!

I hate it too!

Stop verbing nouns!

I’m guessing you typed that ironically?

@EvenMoreFuriousVexation someone said confused dot com to me on the phone at work the other day, I was a bit

I will judge anyone who still says ‘confused.com’ as a thing... believe it or not, I know a couple of people who will add ‘not’ to the end of a sentence, a la Wayne’s World circa 1992. Horrific.

Howling (on its own) because if you are then you’re batshit crazy 😜
‘This is outing’ Well it’s not outing to me so spill the beans love!

I have found me people!

I swear my BP rose just reading all of this.

But I have to admit to LOL too.

Because Mumsnet....

Oh my god that pained me to even type that.

Thank you to another poster for describing why I hate 'this one' so much!

*my people ffs

@FuckingFabulous

I loathe it when someone posts a picture of themselves and someone else with a caption like, 'Having coffee with this one.' As if this is the human you selected from your collection for today.

Fuck off immediately.

😂

@LApprentiSorcier

I hate 'until it didn't/wasn't' etc.

I.e. I was happy in my marriage until I wasn't.
The treatment worked until it didn't.

I've noticed this formula infiltrating a lot of recently published books and it's annoying. It's not clever, it's not funny, it's just lazy.

I think there's a place for this. I've used it, for example when a plonker with a mastiff was letting his dog leg it around the kiddies playground. "It's OK, Ruffles is lovely with children.' 'They all are,' I replied, 'until they're not.'

And 'because...', for example 'because covid'.

Oooh also... "The boy" and "the girl".

As in... The boy is 13 today.

So the girl won her netball game.

Like they aren't even worthy of a name!!

And yes I know I started a sentence with so....! Purely ironic I swear

YANBU.

I hate, hate, hate to the point where I want to reach through the screen and give the poster a shake, “reader, I married him.”

@pangolina

I can't stand the current the ones I'm seeing on facebook related to children's birthdays: "And just like that, we have a 5 year old" and "and in the blink of an eye, he's 5"

What's wrong with that? It's hyperbole.

@PrettyGuyforaWhiteFly

Oooh also... "The boy" and "the girl".

As in... The boy is 13 today.

So the girl won her netball game.

Like they aren't even worthy of a name!!

I use 'the toddler' and 'the baby' because I don't share my kids' names on social media. 🤷

@EvenMoreFuriousVexation

"What's irritated me over about the last 5 years is the muddling of nouns, verbs and adjectives. Such as "You are a lol", "He is a small", "I'm sexying all over the place", "I magic wanded it", "You really heroed the beef" (I'm looking at you, Masterchef Australia)"

Thank heavens such blatherings are not spouted amongst 'my people'.
I would find it extremely difficult not to whack a spouter of the above with a wet fish, repeatedly.