Anyone else get annoyed over people choosing the same baby names?

SpottyMcdotty · 2021-03-16T12:27:12+00:00

Had my son last year. First name isn’t very unique but it’s not hugely common. Let’s say he’s called Terry and middle name Francis. Someone I know has just had a son and called him Terry with the middle name Francis Why is that annoying me so much? 😂 would anyone else be annoyed? I know I don’t own the name but at least go for a unique middle name

piglet81 · 16/03/2021 12:29

I don’t think I could tell you any of my friends’ children’s middle names tbh. It’s probably unintentional even if they do know your child’s middle name!

Emeraldshamrock · 16/03/2021 12:29

No unless it was my Dsis or someone we spend a lot of time with.
I thought my DD's name was old fashioned 12 years ago now there is loads with her name.

ElizaDelphine · 16/03/2021 12:30

A friend was pregnant at the same time as me but further along. She said she liked the same name we'd picked so might use it. I thought it would like like we copied. She ended up having the other sex. People will say it's fine but I agree it's a bit odd

Hadenough21 · 16/03/2021 12:32

It doesn’t really matter. Middle names never get said again really (outside your own family) after the birth announcement, I can’t remember most of my friends babies middle names! So in that respect it wouldn’t make any difference if they’d given him another middle name. I could more understand you being bothered by the first name, but maybe it’s the only one they both liked and felt right? If it’s not a very unusual name then other people are going to use it.

DragonPoop · 16/03/2021 12:43

When we chose our little boys name (before he was born we stupidly told friends/family) and everyone said it was horrible and old fashioned and shouldn’t be given to anyone who wasn’t 80- now it’s in the top 10 names, and I know of at least 5 people on Facebook that have given their child the same name.
I couldn’t get wound up about it to be honest- there are only so many names out there, just be flattered that they think you have good taste

littlepattilou · 16/03/2021 13:10

No, I would never be bothered by this, and I never have been. I don't get why people DO get so upset. My extended family has 2 Pauls, 3 Davids, 2 Louises, 2 Peters, and 3 Michaels. All aged between 42 and 58. These are all blood relatives, not ones who married into the family.

The 2 Peters (who are 2 of my first cousins,) are only 3 months apart in age. So 2 of my aunts used the same baby name. I can't remember hearing about anyone being angry or upset about it. (Back in the mid 1970s when they were born.)

It was quite common for families to have 2 or 3 people with the same Christian name/forename when I was growing up, yet now people go loco if someone they know uses the same first name!!! Totally batshit.

Knitterbabe · 16/03/2021 13:15

Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery.
A young colleague recently gave her daughter the same name as my , now grown, DD. She was worried that I might mind, despite them being years apart. I was delighted!

Original poster

SpottyMcdotty · 16/03/2021 13:18

@littlepattilou

No, I would never be bothered by this, and I never have been. I don't get why people DO get so upset. My extended family has 2 Pauls, 3 Davids, 2 Louises, 2 Peters, and 3 Michaels. All aged between 42 and 58. These are all blood relatives, not ones who married into the family.

The 2 Peters (who are 2 of my first cousins,) are only 3 months apart in age. So 2 of my aunts used the same baby name. I can't remember hearing about anyone being angry or upset about it. (Back in the mid 1970s when they were born.)

It was quite common for families to have 2 or 3 people with the same Christian name/forename when I was growing up, yet now people go loco if someone they know uses the same first name!!! Totally batshit.

But the name isn’t David, Paul, Louise or Michael? If you read properly you’d see that I wrote “it’s not a common name” - if it was I’d have no grounds to be annoyed.

However, when the name in question isn’t even in the top 100 boys names, I think I have some grounds to feel weird about it

OP posts:

littlepattilou · 16/03/2021 13:22

@SpottyMcdotty

But the name isn’t David, Paul, Louise or Michael? If you read properly you’d see that I wrote “it’s not a common name” - if it was I’d have no grounds to be annoyed.

Fair enough, the name you are picking is not common,

But I still think YABU. It's none of your business if someone uses the same baby name as you.

You don't OWN any name.

I know that's a mumsnet cliche, but it's a fact.

Mylovelyhorsee · 16/03/2021 13:25

@SpottyMcdotty

No you have no grounds to feel weird at all. You didn’t invent the names, you don’t own the names.

StillCoughingandLaughing · 16/03/2021 13:25

You’ll get a lot of people telling you ‘nobody owns a name’, and it’s true - but I agree with you that it’s an odd thing to do. My parents gave me a name that rhymes with my aunt’s name and, while I like my name, could have lived without a lifetime of family parties spent having to check whether someone was calling for Aggie or Maggie (not the names, but you get the point). The worst thing is, no one learned from this, and the youngest boy in the family has the male version of my mother’s name - meaning they both get called by the shortened version. Seriously, there are thousands of names out there!

StillCoughingandLaughing · 16/03/2021 13:30

The 2 Peters (who are 2 of my first cousins,) are only 3 months apart in age. So 2 of my aunts used the same baby name. I can't remember hearing about anyone being angry or upset about it. (Back in the mid 1970s when they were born.)

Now THAT’S batshit.

Youseethethingis · 16/03/2021 13:32

I had the reverse of this. One of DHs mates wives made it known she was very put out that we used her baby name and middle name several months before she did!
We aren’t particularly close, we had no idea what they were planning to name their baby if he was a boy and even if we did we still would have picked the same name.
If anything I think it’s weird they then went for their second choice name, as they will know their child a lot longer than they will know us!

JeanClaudeVanDammit · 16/03/2021 13:47

DD has a name outside the top 100, it’s not a “unique” name it’s just an old name not used that much. A work colleague called his DD that a few months later and said I’d given him the idea. Can’t say I was too bothered as it wasn’t anyone close. If it was my sister or best friend or something I might think it was a bit weird.

VinterKvinna · 16/03/2021 13:51

As we don't know what the name is, it's almost impossible to comment

HarkAVagrant · 16/03/2021 13:54

You say it’s not even a friend, just “someone you know”. It wouldn’t bother me at all. People do have the same names in this world. I just had to interview someone with a relatively unusual name, Googled them to check their job title and there were a few to choose from.
My son’s friend has the same name as him, first name and middle, it’s not a problem.

Mylovelyhorsee · 16/03/2021 13:55

In a pregnancy exercise class the teacher was pregnant and asked us our older children’s names, I said mine. She said she liked the name, and she ended up calling her daughter that name. When I heard I wasn’t bothered. It’s a great name!

StepOutOfLine · 16/03/2021 13:57

@StillCoughingandLaughing

The 2 Peters (who are 2 of my first cousins,) are only 3 months apart in age. So 2 of my aunts used the same baby name. I can't remember hearing about anyone being angry or upset about it. (Back in the mid 1970s when they were born.)

Now THAT’S batshit.

It's very common in Italy and is done to honour the grandparents.

OP, yes, YABU.