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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Parking catch 22

19 replies

StormCattitude · 15/03/2021 13:22

Anyone with first hand experience able to help with this?

Problem neighbour has begun to get visitors parking over my drive. I know, they shouldn't even have visitors but that's not what this is about. Their visitors are starting to park across my dropped kerb. Stops me parking on my driveway. So far only happened when I've been out so I couldn't park on, rather than not being able to leave which I know is a different thing but could also potentially happen. So it's not always one repeat offender but the neighbours are the repeated factor. I feel its likely they are getting their visitors to park there as another tactic to target me (would rather not get into the background unless it becomes relavent but I don't think it is to my query).

My query is this. Who'd you call?! My council website says its a police matter. My police website says its a council matter. Rather than spend ages calling each (which I can't do at the mo anyway due to landlines issues) I wondered if anyone had the answer! There's much parking issue experience on MN, please help!

I'm stressed as I raised it with them recently as in could you ask visitors not to do this, it causes problems for us not bring able to get on our drive, was polite etc, got a nasty comment back which led me to feel they are acutely aware what they are doing to put me in a sh1te difficult position.

Thanks peeps.

OP posts:
FixTheBone · 15/03/2021 13:26

read this article and follow the link to see if where you live it is the council or the police repsonsible.

www.askthe.police.uk/content/Q440.htm

Blockedoff · 15/03/2021 13:26

This has nothing to do with the fact they're being lazy etc, everything to do with wanting to piss you off.

I'd say contact the council parking department.

peak2021 · 15/03/2021 13:35

Unless you are sure there is a reason such as providing care (doubt it), report them for Covid 19 breaches, every single time, take the car number plate down. You have asked nicely once.

skirk64 · 15/03/2021 13:46

I think if they are blocking you getting onto your drive, there's not a lot you can do. The council/police will only get involved if your car is on the drive already and they are blocking you in.

nellly · 15/03/2021 13:49

I would just go round and knock persistently on neighbours house and loudly ask for the car to be moved. Even if your neghbhours hate you I can't imagine being a guest at someone's house and having the gall to not move my car hearing the person who couldn't get into their drive

Ginuwine · 15/03/2021 13:51

Have you spoken to your neighbour, what did they say?

catmandont · 15/03/2021 13:56

Every time they do it you need to react in a calm but assertive way.

If you are blocked in, knock on the door and don't leave until they move the car. If they are blocking you from getting onto your drive sit in the car with the horn on until they move.

Lacucuracha · 15/03/2021 14:06

Could you park on the driveway yourself whilst you address this with them?

DDiva · 15/03/2021 14:08

Yes I think persistence is key, sound your horn or knock on the door until.they move. Alternatively can you park on their drive or block them/ visitors in. Then when they knock for you to move just say well I couldnt get on my drive.......

Jemma2907 · 15/03/2021 14:10

With my local council, if someone is over your dropped curb, regardless of whether your car is on the drive, you fill in a form and they send Parking Wardens round within 4 hours (only took them 20 minutes for me last time) to give them a parking ticket. The last one I reported wasn't even fully over but it blocked my ability to park as they're wheel covered entry. The form was hidden on my council website so have a search on yours.

Ginuwine · 15/03/2021 14:15

@StormCattitude

Anyone with first hand experience able to help with this?

Problem neighbour has begun to get visitors parking over my drive. I know, they shouldn't even have visitors but that's not what this is about. Their visitors are starting to park across my dropped kerb. Stops me parking on my driveway. So far only happened when I've been out so I couldn't park on, rather than not being able to leave which I know is a different thing but could also potentially happen. So it's not always one repeat offender but the neighbours are the repeated factor. I feel its likely they are getting their visitors to park there as another tactic to target me (would rather not get into the background unless it becomes relavent but I don't think it is to my query).

My query is this. Who'd you call?! My council website says its a police matter. My police website says its a council matter. Rather than spend ages calling each (which I can't do at the mo anyway due to landlines issues) I wondered if anyone had the answer! There's much parking issue experience on MN, please help!

I'm stressed as I raised it with them recently as in could you ask visitors not to do this, it causes problems for us not bring able to get on our drive, was polite etc, got a nasty comment back which led me to feel they are acutely aware what they are doing to put me in a sh1te difficult position.

Thanks peeps.

You say it's a tactic but you don't want to get into it unless it's relevant...

Forgive me for saying, but if it's malicious as part of an ongoing dispute OP, then I think it IS relevant.

Are you in a position to speak to them and explain why you need access at all times, as is your right, so you can enter and exit your home?

Or are you and neighbour not on any speaking terms therefore dialogue is impossible?

StormCattitude · 15/03/2021 14:15

@Ginuwine

Have you spoken to your neighbour, what did they say?
Yes I caught one of them the following day last time it happened & asked if they could ask their visitors not to do it. All I got back was confirmation it was their visitor who did it & told to call the authorities next time. Which indicates they plan on doing it again & have no intention to discuss or stop. Conversation was then ended as they shut the door on me. Horrible ppl.

I'm not looking to be pals with them I just want to know my options & who is actually responsible for this area. I feel they target me amongst other reasons because I'm alone with 2 young children so it's hard dealing with these things as I have my kids with me all the time & I have other things to focus attention on than their behaviour so it catches me by surprise. Makes me feel vulnerable compared to the 2 parent families who they'd never mess with as i don't think they'd challenge a bloke. The sort who throw their weight about unless they think there's someone louder & brasher then put their heads back below the parapet. Completely different experience of them when my ex lived here, never had any real trouble, they wouldn't dare have messed with him. I'd move if it was an option but it isn't at present. We both own our houses if that's relavent.

OP posts:
Ginuwine · 15/03/2021 14:24

@StormCattitude

Thanks for the long reply and so sorry to hear of this situation for you.

You're spot on it sounds like the neighbour is brash, horrible and entitled and they know that your complaints will not change their behaviour - only some sort of sanction from an authority will.

It's bullying and offensive anti social behaviour, plain and simple.

I'd follow the advise that wiser posters placed before me in this thread and contact whoever you need to. This sounds like you've got a nightmare neighbour who doesn't respect women. Fuck that.

LookItsMeAgain · 15/03/2021 14:31

I've had an issue very very similar to the one you describe @StormCattitude, so instead of parking on my driveway, I parked across it, right up to the party line between my house and my next door neighbour.
They came out and called me 'petty' for doing it.
I wouldn't know if I was either going to be prohibited from leaving my driveway without getting their permission or blocked from returning to my driveway because they were parked over it so I parked across it myself. I wasn't doing anything that they weren't already doing to me and I also wasn't parking across their driveway or anyone else's for that matter. They have since stopped blocking my driveway, so I'm putting that down as a win.

StormCattitude · 15/03/2021 15:15

@LookItsMeAgain

I've had an issue very very similar to the one you describe *@StormCattitude*, so instead of parking on my driveway, I parked across it, right up to the party line between my house and my next door neighbour. They came out and called me 'petty' for doing it. I wouldn't know if I was either going to be prohibited from leaving my driveway without getting their permission or blocked from returning to my driveway because they were parked over it so I parked across it myself. I wasn't doing anything that they weren't already doing to me and I also wasn't parking across their driveway or anyone else's for that matter. They have since stopped blocking my driveway, so I'm putting that down as a win.
I'd be worried they'd do something 'accidentally' to my car if it was on the street. Or their kids on bikes / scooters / with heavy footballs / rugby balls. It's an existing issue even on my drive, theirs kids have no control of these things then deny if they've knocked my car on my drive! And of course the parents who are never watching take the kids word. Ugh.
OP posts:
Lurkingforawhile · 15/03/2021 15:20

Sorry this is happening to you. Sounds stressful, and the only thing I have to add is to get a doorcam so you can evidence any damage caused to your car

StoneofDestiny · 15/03/2021 15:50

Make sure you complaint is about intimidation and harassment of a female, not just inconvenience. You might get the authorities to sit up more.

JustDespair · 15/03/2021 16:09

@skirk64

I think if they are blocking you getting onto your drive, there's not a lot you can do. The council/police will only get involved if your car is on the drive already and they are blocking you in.
Maybe in some places but this isn't true for all councils and people need to stop saying it whenever this topic comes up.
StormCattitude · 15/03/2021 16:43

I have a basic camera positioned on my driveway, thanks to those who suggested it though as I've felt better since having it & someone else reading this might be in a similar situation where it could be useful to them too!

OP posts:
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