To take one year old to New York

[CleverQuacks]

For a minute imagine Covid isn’t an issue. I have always loved travelling and have a list of destinations I want to see as long as my arm. Covid has made me realise that life is short so i have decided I want to see one new place every year.

New York is top of the list so I am considering booking for next year. The problem is, I have a baby who will be 15 months old. I am a single mum with no dad involved so I don’t have anyone who would look after him. I think I would be fine taking him with me. It would be an adventure. But my mum and sister say I am crazy.

The reality is I don’t want to wait til he is 18 and independent before I see the world so we are going to have to get used to travelling together.

I don’t drink alcohol and not into partying. I mainly want to see the shops and various museums and landmarks. Also eat American food!

Am I crazy?

A mobile toddler will be bored to tears in shops or museums.
Absolutely travel, but make it interesting for them. What you are planning would be fine with a younger baby but I think you are underestimating how different they will be by then.

@BlueJag

You can take a baby anywhere. Our son was about 13 months when we went to Charlotte NC vía New York. No problem at all.

Well of course you can take a baby anywhere. But you'll have a vastly different experience to an all adult trip.

We visited New York when the youngest was 5 . I’d want them to be able to walk tbh . We had a fantastic time and it’s the one place they want to go back to when this is all over .

I wouldn't fancy the flight! Xx

I would take a baby who couldn't walk or crawl, but I wouldn't take one who could. You won't be able to do anything you want to do and you'll end up in Central Park all day!

Haven’t read all the thread sorry ; I took my dd numerous times to NY (on my own) between the ages of 7m and 3 and then took her and her baby brother a few times, again on my own. In my experience, the younger they are the easier the jet lag is. There’s loads to do, you will both have a great time! Feel free to dm me if you want any further tips!

So with the time difference I found it worked best to take an evening flight that arrives at 10pm ish. Young ones sleep a bit on the flight; then a few hours awake when you arrive/travel into the city, then a bit more sleep before waking around 5am. Whilst there we do early dinner and have DC in bed for usual time, maybe a little later and I’m not far behind!

@BlueJag

You can take a baby anywhere. Our son was about 13 months when we went to Charlotte NC vía New York. No problem at all.

One thing is the trip. Another is a holiday stay alone in a very busy large city.

Unless you'll be able to afford other trips in the future, it won't be the same as an adult alone or even a couple with a young child.
You will, and he will too, enjoy it more in a few years.

I would wait on this particular trip until your dc is older. He will get so much more out of it, as will you, as you will be able to share the experience. I took my daughter when she was 18 for her birthday, and she appreciated it so much more than had we gone years earlier. Your DS will remember nothing of the trip, and it will mean as much to him as if you had gone for a trip to Spain, but you will have all the stress of the long flight.

I took my 4 monther around NY before covid. The subway was hell. If you can avoid that, do. Lots of broken lifts so me carrying him in the travel pram up and down stairs or even escalators. Also the turnstile for prams - need to use the disabled one which usually requires you flagging down the attention of one of the ticket attendants to watch you punch your ticket and then they'll buzz you through. I spent a lot of time desperately waving for 20mins.

Washington DC and Austin are great in comparison - lots of great culture and food and far more baby friendly.

We've done a few city breaks in Europe to fairly chilled out cities and that was hard work at times - DS was constantly on the go, we had to time every museum with a nap (hard when they're down to 1 nap a day) or else we couldn't look at anything. Great fun but maybe not the holiday we had in mind. I love NY but I think it would be better with a older child (6+)

I think it would be crazy. You may have this idea of cruising around museums and sightseeing, but where will your toddler be during those hours? Definitely not sitting in the stroller. He will be wanting to run around and explore, so you might not get to see anything! Also think about the transport?? Nightmare with a small child. I've done this trip many times and I would never do this with small children who can't actually walk a good distance by themselves.

You should do it! Otherwise you'll always be wondering...

We went with a 12month old and it was the best trip we ever had. We loved the sites, the food and everything about it. DS loved taking it all in too.

I'm not sure how much harder it would have been at 18 months when they are walking but as they get tired quite quickly I'm sure you could do some little toddler walks around the park etc and then he will be happy to sit in his pram and have snack etc while you look at shops? Depends what type of temperament he has.

Planning and optimism will make it a great trip! X

We took DD to Florida when she was 5 months and it was a dream. But she's now 17 months and the flight alone would be a nightmare- she doesn't want to sit on my knee for that long (unless Fancy Nancy is on the telly ), she'd be too big for the sky cot, and she doesn't have the attention span to watch a film or do activities for more than five minutes at a time. She wants to be running about, shouting and annoying strangers, which clearly isn't ideal. An 8 hour flight would be horrific, and that even with the benefit of having DH there who could take over to give me a break. Logistically as well getting baby, a pram, your luggage etc from the airport on the subway to your hotel....no.

Then once you get there, it just doesn't seem like it would be much fun for either of you. DD is pretty good in the pram but she'll only tolerate it for about 1.5 hours before she wants out. Can you imagine going round the Met with your DC going toke because they want out of the stroller? And trying to hold their hand and push the pram at the same time? I don't think you'd get to appreciate much art doing that, and a 15 month old would be bored out of their tree.

I'm absolutely not saying you shouldn't travel. If I were you I'd test the water with a low pressure city break closer to home, somewhere you can get to cheaply and stay for 3 or 4 days- Paris, Berlin, Lisbon or similar. See what works and what doesn't and start spreading your wings further afield. If it's shit then you haven't spoiled your NYC dream and spent £££ on a disaster.

Personally I wouldn’t do it. Not alone. If I’m spending that much money on a trip, I want to enjoy it, not just be exhausted the entire time.

We live in the US and have traveled back to the Uk approximately once a year since our kids were babies. The worst age is between about 1-3. I’ve done a lot of flights alone, and it can be really hard work. And I usually have family or DH to give me a break once I get to my destination. And the jet lag is a killer

I’d probably do somewhere closer and save that trip for when they’re older. My DS is 5 now and I think he’d enjoy a trip to nyc and he’d be fine on a flight with his iPad. At 15 months he just wanted to run around and throw himself into danger at all times

Thanks for all your advice guys. It’s great to hear everyone’s experiences. I haven’t decided whether I am going to go or not yet. Trialing a smaller city break first is a really good suggestion so will probably do that.

It’s not personally somewhere I’d have gone with my son at that age, though we did fly frequently from when he was a baby. Unless it’s changed, I found the metro system a pain in NY as you had to get the right entrance if going, say, uptown, otherwise you had to literally come back up and cross over the street (not like London where you enter and then find the right direction). Be prepared to do a lot of walking if you want to avoid the metro.

Wherever you go, use a carrier. I used a decent toddler sized carrier until son was 5 and it was an absolute godsend for travelling solo, especially through airports and immigration queues when he could sleep on my back and leave my hands free for luggage.

Do it!! I took my daughter for my 30th and she was 15months old.. my husband was there bur I would have gone without him (that was initially the plan). I had a rucksack carrier and a stroller. It was a great weekend break. I would say maybe take longer than a weekend as navigating, stopping, eating my take longer than an adult trip.. bit just go and be free children learn when we teach them and child will get used to travelling with you!

I took a 2.5 yo DC to Chicago mostly by myself and it was great. DH was there for work, I flew out on my own with my DC and we spent the daytime exploring while DH was working. It worked well as DS was still in a buggy and napped, so we walked most places and I did my adult interests, like museums and shops, during nap times. I would go at a time when the weather is mild enough to be outside, as we had plenty of pit stops at parks and outside seating at coffee shops so my son could get out of the buggy and stretch his legs. Getting round the city with a buggy was fine and the few times it was difficult I got a taxi. Someone always helped when needed on the flight or in the city.

I'd pick a family friendly European city first. Berlin is, and Lisbon. I took a baby to Berlin on my own. It was hard work mainly due to a heat wave.

NYC: fine. Easy enough to navigate & have a nice time, if you like cities, with a young toddler. (Especially if you’re used to traipsing around London).
Flight: I wouldn’t particularly look forward to but, ok.
Jetlag: Nah. Mine always slept worse away from home anyway, & coupled with Jetlag/3am starts I wouldn’t be feeling the joy. Especially solo. Maybe if you were looking to go for over a week. Or if you’re someone who’s good at still functioning of no sleep. But that’s what would put me off/take enjoyment of a ‘holiday’ away.

My DH is from NY so I’ve often been with kids. Flight wise for me trickiest age was 1-3. They are awake enough to need entertaining but not happy to watch tv the whole flight. Take plenty of snacks and activities.

Getting around NY is fine but not that easy - steps on subway and buggies can be hard to get into cabs. Hotel rooms are pretty small so think about what you’ll do during downtime.

There’s lots of things to do and it’s easier pushing a buggy around than dragging a 5 year old. Baby won’t get much out of it but if you think you will enjoy and are prepared to to miss things due to tired baby then go for it.

As early teens my kids are now much more into NY. But as babies the loved the zoo in Central Park. Also check out camp toy store in midtown.

One last thing to think about - jetlag. I find it hard and brutal with babies.

I think the first issue is not the travelling but the way you feel,afterwards, the child could well stick to normal sleep patterns on the journey and wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed, you however will at some point hit a brick wall. And then once you are over that little blip you are then going to be spending all day with a small child and no respite, in the evening you will be in a hotel room , without normal distractions. Small kids don’t really enjoy being taken from new place to new place all day, they don’t realise they are looking at something iconic and memorable. You will have to be keeping a close hold and eye on a small child so your enjoyment of being in an iconic and exciting city will also be tempered by the stress of keeping you both safe in a busy and strange city environment.

Children are for life, you don’t have to do every little thing with them before they are ten. Simply wait a few years and go when both of you will enjoy and remember the experience.

Lots of closer places to go to that both of you will get something back from.

I love New York but I wouldn’t take my toddler. A baby in a sling would be much easier I would imagine.