To worry about late August DS starting school..

[RubiksCubey]

My son is born in late august and he is starting school this September.

I am really worried about his "school readiness".

He is very hyper and chatty, which is fine. But I am wondering if I should be focussing more on activities to get him ready and prepare him.

For example:
I haven't forced any formal phonics and numbers learning on to him, when it comes up in play we have a little practice.

At the moment he is still only 3, and he doesn't enjoy too much "sit down and focus" activities.
I try to do some of this to encourage his focus like the Orchard Games or craft activities.

I don't really want to, I want to leave him to free play and explore, as I know children, particularly boys, are not "school ready" for another couple of years, but that doesn't change the expectation in the UK 

I worry he will start school and be upset or be told off for not doing as is expected, or not being able to do as expected.

YABU - He should be school ready

YANBU - He should be encouraged his free play and the rest he will pick up

Deferring doesn’t always mean staff reception a year later it can mean go straight into year 1. Reception is like nursery anyway, I do not understand the benefit of holding a child back a year.

OP... My son is pretty much the youngest they can be in the school year. As PP have said don't bother with phonics etc... Its the practical things others have listed. I'd also add being able to recognise their own name is a good one.. So they can find their clothes peg, books etc.

Your child's school will likely do some type of meeting for parents in the summer...might help with any specific questions.

Was my DS behind in reception... Yep academically.. But school judged on age. He was absolutely fine socially, emotionally and physically... Much better than many older children.
I did notice in infants he always seemed behind at beginning of year and say Feb suddenly it clicked and he would catch up coming on tremendously by the end of the year... Then cycle would start again in Sept... It helped sending him to a tutor over the summer holidays end of Yr 1 & 2... We used explore learning as computer based which he loved... To just keep him going.... He went back much stronger academically as he hadn't dropped back

August-born DS2 was literally weeks out of nappies when he started YR (not for lack of trying by me and nursery...he just didn’t see the point of toilets ) but there was no way I was keeping him back a year, mainly because the separate nursery and school drop-offs morning and evening for him and DS1 were killing me. We’d never done any ‘academic’ stuff with him because the life skills were still so far behind and were the priority.

He’s now the top reader and speller in Y2, rattles off obscure historical facts with very little encouragement and we’ve had to shell out for individual guitar lessons because he can’t be taught with his own age group anymore as he’s outpacing the Y6s. Better than any of that, though, he can finally wipe his own bum

I would never hold a child back, personally. I’d be more concerned about an older child in a year group being held back by or copying the younger/less mature ones. I see a younger child as being given the opportunity of having mature behaviour and expectations modelled for them. That’s certainly been the case in my experience anyway.

When my second son started in Reception year, I helped out one day a week as there were no teaching assistants. The whole class were put in groups going by their birthdays. Yes the September to December ones did seem to be given harder work than those in June to August group. I usually helped in the 2 youngest groups. Apart from the actual work, everything else was good.

My first son was born in May and we were given the option of him doing mornings only until October half term, which we did, but because he missed out on lunchtime and the longer play, the rest of the class had already built up friendships so if I was given that opportunity again, I wouldn’t have taken it.

After lots and lots of research and thought I have decided to defer my August Born son’s start date.

He ‘should’ be starting this year at just turned 4, but instead he will be starting next year at just turned 5.

Don't worry about phonics etc most teachers find that its harder to reteach the way the school teach than start from scratch.
I've had 3 dc go through reception what's most important is they can put their coat on/off, get dressed /undressed for pe, go to the toilet independently, sit and eat a meal, know when to listen, able to take turns/share.
Maybe practice holding a pencil correctly and sitting drawing but don't force anything, enjoy the time you have together learning through play - this is what happens in reception.

Your son sounds similar to my DS who was born a couple of days before the cut off, he had no phonics knowledge and couldn't write his name when he started. Reception teachers are magicians as far as I'm concerned and soon had him making progress.

I'm sure your son will be absolutely fine but i know it doesn't stop you worrying! It sounds like he is school ready from what you say about toiletting etc.

I can't speak for all summer babies but for us we have no regrets about sending DS when we did, socially he was definitely ready to start. It took him a couple of years to reach the levels expected of him educationally, but he went in on the first day without a care in the world and has always loved going into school.

You don't have to send him. My daughter is August born and I deferred her - she's in Year 2 now and it was definitely the right decision for us.

I was born in late August and I was always fine at school. I think children start school too young anyway, even the older ones. They're all in the same boat.

I never did any phonics at home with DS before he started school.

Things such as being able to clothe and dress, yes use a toilet outside the home should be the first thing to ensure. I don't see then why ten minutes each day on numbers, for example, should be done.

If you do defer then please don't assume this will follow right thro education. Some secondaries esp academies only take thrm into their correct year group so they end up missing year 6 or 7. Also when it comes to high school and out f school sport teams they usually are expected to compete in their correct year group.

I have an august born and was very worried. Pp are right focus on teaching him to get dressed/put his coat on etc
It’s worth considering deferring him but not all authorities allow deferred children to go into year r the following year. I thought about it but eventually decided against. They do grown up an awful lot in those last few months before going to school. Still mine was terribly small and young on his first day.

That all said he is now year 3 and putting aside covid has been totally fine. I can now see it was the right thing to send him when I did

Ps you haven’t mentioned if your son goes to childcare. I would highly recommend you send him part time to a nursery for these next few months they do a lot to prepare them. Particularly school nurseries but also private ones.

We are finding the orchard games really good for number and letter recognition without the pressure of “teaching” at home.

He’s still a baby

Just relax and see how it goes

You don't need to any formal phonics before starting Reception. It helps if children can recognise their own name, perhaps have a go at writing it. Recognising different colours and counting objects.

Much more important though, to toilet independently, dress themselves, put on shoes and coat, basic social skills such as sharing/ taking turns with other children. Enjoy looking at books and being read to.

I deferred my July DS and very pleased we did so. In our area it’s automatic, parent choice which year a summer born starts.

My dd is has a late July birthday and was absolutely ready for school. We practised getting school uniform on, taking it off and putting on PE kit and putting her uniform neatly in her bag. Getting changed again in reverse and counting everything back into her bag. We did lots of turn taking games, following instruction games and read loads of books 'together'. We practised using the toilet, flushing, washing hands. Sitting at the table for snack together. Using a cup for water. Sitting nicely at the table and eating then waiting for everyone to finish. When she was interested we did colouring, playdoh and activities like tracing shapes with a paintbrush in sprinkles, painting the fence with water - anything to build the muscles in her hand in preparation for starting to learn to write.

You don't need to do phonics but share books together, look for the dog can you spot a red hat etc.

My son started kindergarten when he was 3 and his teacher focused on 'readiness to learn' skills like these too.

Check on some local primary school websites for info about starting school. They might have a list of things they like the children to be able to do. You don't need to be doing phonics but he should ideally be able to recognise his written name (and surname) and to write his first name himself so he can label his drawings and paintings.

If you do defer then please don't assume this will follow right thro education. Some secondaries esp academies only take thrm into their correct year group so they end up missing year 6 or 7.

Thankfully this is no longer the case.

I have had extensive conversation with the Admission Department of our LA and they said that it is extremely unlikely this will ever happen, and in fact he’s never known it. If a school gets funny about it they have to provide a written statement as to why they think it’s in the child’s best interest for them to miss a whole academic year and be placed in a cohort with children they don’t even know.

I can’t see many schools being able to provide a justifiable reason for that.

Also, at the moment there is a lot of work going into the admission policies of summer
Born children, especially with regards to transition to high school and it’s very likely that in the next few years it will be an automatic right to remain with their cohort throughout the entirety of their education.

I have been in talks with two schools regarding the deferral of my son’s start from this year to next year, both of which have been incredibly supportive and as a result I have been told by the LA and the Academy Trusts for my area, that my son will remain with his ‘out of age’ cohort until he leaves education.

My late august DD started reception last September and all has been fine. I’ve not noticed anything to suggest she’s struggled or is behind etc.

Would agree with others here. No need to do phonics. Let the school teach them and you can support at home through reception. If your son likes to write already then let/encourage him but other activities like play doh and colouring can help work up their fingers and hands.

Good idea to think about practical stuff. Like dressing etc. I’m not sure we did enough on that and mine can still struggle with dressing but I think she’s a lot more capable at school when with peers. Ie likes being looked after at home but perfectly capable of eating a dinner with a knife and fork at school.

Trust your school. The teachers are incredibly capable of meeting children where they are and working to a range of academic and general capability and maturity.

Hope your son has a great start at school.

My DS is a late August birthday. When he started school, I delayed him by a term. Sadly delaying a year wasn’t an option then.

He’s 15 now. He’s clever, so academically it hasn’t been a problem. But emotionally he’s always been behind his peers. He was teased for still having a Thomas the Tank Engine bag when the others had moved on. He didn’t get interested in girls when the others did. His voice was the last to break. And soon he’ll be finding he’s the last to learn to drive. It goes on and on. Being the youngest, always, isn’t fun. He has friends and he’s happy, but if I’d been able to hold him back a year, I would have done. And it would have made his life so much better.

Bagamoyo1 this is how DH feels about also being Aug born. Academically fine (he’s now a doctor) but always the youngest & behind the crowd, feeling like a late bloomer.

I think you're doing all the right things getting ready with dressing/undressing, using the toilet and maybe being able to have a go at writing their own name (DC1 was encouraged to do this at nursery during pre-school years)

We didn't do any phonics at home prior to starting reception- I'll admit I wasn't even quite sure what phonics was all about!

They got on great & loved reception, now about to turn 7

DC2 is late summer baby but have no plans to delay starting them next September 2022, unless any issues or specific concerns come up between now and then

Just to add- in August born and never felt it held me back apart from struggling to get into pubs with my mates who had all turned 18 already

But looking back, we all had fake ID and got into pubs/bars aged 16 & 17 but that's a story for a different thread entirely!