To expect a Mother's Day card

[jelly79]

So ex left when I was 4 months pregnant (planned baby and long term relationship) it's been a tough 4 years and I have tried so hard to remain amicable for DS sake

Tonight he drops him off, stays for 20 mins chatting. No card. No flowers. Nothing.

I do 90% of everything.he sees him EOW.

AIBU to expect a card for tomorrow? His thoughts are my teenage daughter will sort that.

My thoughts are. He is a knob

(I send a card / gift from DS for every occasion)

I don't think you should expect your ex to buy you flowers and a card. Maybe if it was easy enough to go to the shops he might let your DS choose a card to give to you but then it would be from DS, not your ex, and it's a bit more difficult to do that at the moment.

I didn’t buy Father’s Day cards once the children made them at school, seems a waste of resources when there is already one in existence. Surely your DS makes a card at nursery for Father’s Day too.

Presumably you wanted to be a parent and choose to be the main care giver and have residency so not sure why he should be appreciative of that.

I think it's lovely that you're trying so hard to have a good relationship with your ex, but I think YABU. Your DS is making something at nursery, and that is much nicer and better learning for your son. You don't need anything else? I wouldn't be doing anything for Father's Day etc, that's for his family to do if nursery don't do that.

If your ex hasn't acknowledged Mother's Day on your son's behalf then I think it's time for you to stop doing it. Otherwise it will start to eat at you.

My Mum and Dad always supplied cards/gifts for us to give for celebrations. They didn't do it for each other... they did it for us children so we didn't worry about it ourselves until we were old enough. I don't think it's too much to expect for him to buy a card, you can get nice ones so cheap.

Maybe he is cringing at the card and gift you have bought. You are not together you do not need to do this. Are you trying to cling on to this relationship?

He’s probably is cringing, there is no need to get a fathers/mothers day card for an ex, at 4 you are doing that for your own benefit as I doubt a 4 year old is asking to send one.

I always help my kids sort out Father's Day / birthday cards for my ex, even though he has never done the same for me. But then I am a better person than he is

Once they are old enough its up to the children. 18 is old enough. Some people get it written into their parenting agreements though so I get that it can be important when kids are younger.

Don't expect him to do anything ever he is a prick. Men like that don't see the world like us because the world is all about them.
Just make sure when you babe is older that she has materials to make a card herself.

@AnotherBoredOne absolutely not 🤣I just think it's right / nice to provide cards and gifts for our son to give. Xmas card is written from my son, not from me

@Shehasadiamondinthesky I hear this!! He will make one in nursery and give it to him. I'm not bothering now X

@Mybestusername yes you are!! I just think it's part of parenting :) x

@MuddleMoo my son is 4 :)

My eldest from a previous relationship is 18 so she very much does all the lovely things x