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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wish fewer people drove their kids to school?

294 replies

zizza · 13/03/2021 15:31

It's been lovely commuting to work since the schools have been (almost) closed. I thought it was because of people also not working, but turns out most of the traffic at "normal" commuting times is school run traffic - kind of knew that from past experience of how much better it in is school holidays, but this has been highlighted by the Covid situation. AIBU to think that more children should walk to school?

I have had to explain to my mum in the past why people drove to school if they have a job to go to straight after dropping off so don't have time to walk to school and then back home to get the car, but I'm still mystified by how many secondary school age children get dropped off by car (again, I understand that some people live too far away from their secondary school to walk but what happened to kids walking up to about 30 minutes to get to school with their friends?) I think I'm getting old...

OP posts:
Osirus · 13/03/2021 21:17

My daughter goes to school 5 miles away. We won’t be walking it.

OverTheRubicon · 13/03/2021 21:24

@beyondtheshoe

It's an ever stronger argument for strict catchments. If you do have to travel 10 miles for the very nearest school, it is what it is.

No one is talking about kids having to walk on the side of a motorway or to cross Heathrow runway.

But when parents chose a school further, or only live temporarily then move, and then pretend they must drive ... that's where it's wrong.

And when you see the amount of cars waiting for the school day to finish in residential areas (so no motorway, no country lane..) you know which parents can't be arsed. Wasting 40 or 30 minutes of your day to secure a parking spot as near the school as possible? Come on...

Our catchment is less than half a mile, and we still have SAHPs doing the school run in cars twice a day. All the posters on here talking about their (almost all entirely valid) reasons to drive are missing how many of their fellow parents are taking the piss.
BrumBoo · 13/03/2021 21:25

Why on earth wouldn't you put the 3yo in a buggy if he struggles?

Because he hates the buggy, he's too big for it, it's absolutely not worth the stress of wrestling him into one and listen to him scream for a mile, he may well fall asleep and absolutely ruin his sleep cycle, he's perfectly capable of walking down a street or two back to the car, it's good practice for his mobility not to be in the parm, because it makes my life easier (especially at 7 months pregnant with a damaged back) to drive and do short walks rather than care what people on the internet think. So many reasons, take your pick.

Oh, the older one has suspected ASD as well, on the days he refuses the walk shall I just put him in a buggy as well? The car has made our lives much easier, just over a mile walk would be a nightmare but now it's one less stress in the day Smile.

Sausagis · 13/03/2021 21:34

You want parents NOT to drive to schools so YOU can drive to work easily?

Lots of parents have time constraints and have to do school drop offs AND get to work: it would be better if we banned child-free people from driving to allow busy parents to be able to drive around easily, no?

Level32 · 13/03/2021 21:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BrumBoo · 13/03/2021 21:59

[quote Level32]@Brumboo

Unsurprisingly, people can only comment regarding the information you give in your post. The first post said not of that, so no need for the sarky reply.

Still other options though, scooters, trikes (that you can still push from the back). My child with ASD and mobility problems will refuse to walk. I did put them in a buggy until age 6 when necessary. Got pointing and laughing at the school gates a few times but you develop a tough skin as a mum of a SN child. But they are more than happy to scoot home.[/quote]
Yup, you do have to develop a thick skin. Hence why I don't particularly care to explain my children or my choices beyond what I want to to people on the internet, and quite happy to continue driving them to school at the moment. I then have the freedom to drive home, to the supermarket, the doctors or wherever I want in the 1.5 hours a day I have currently child-free, which are all within a 3 mile or less radius, without having to worry about timing in walking or hope the buses are actually running properly. It's bliss, really have zero guilt over it. Thanks for your viewpoint though Smile.

BrumBoo · 13/03/2021 22:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BrumBoo · 13/03/2021 22:01

Double post but you get the point. I hope anyway.

SelkieQualia · 13/03/2021 22:04

I really would love to use my bike more, but there are so many areas where it's just not safe! We need more separated bike paths, like Amsterdam.

SuperSange · 13/03/2021 22:08

I drive and drop on my way to work. I hope that's ok. 🙄

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 13/03/2021 22:21

Yanbu in principle. I live in a village where the primary school is a maximum of 10 minutes walk for everyone yet see parents who live here and don't work dropping kids by car. I never understand that (I do understand the problem of working parents who need to get to work though, which is a huge issue).

But

Where I live it's a grammar/secondary modern area. The council have simply stopped providing buses to the grammar school. They can argue that they are fulfilling their obligations regarding school transport by only serving the secondary modern. The public transport options are limited and its too far to walk and not a safe cycling route (high speed A road). Its been a complete nightmare for parents. No working parents wants to be juggling their job and a chaotic car pool with another parent trying to get their kids to school.

Sirzy · 13/03/2021 22:27

Sadly most days now I have to drive Ds to school even though it should be walkable because his disabilities mean it’s just not possible.

My issue isn’t with people driving to school, it’s the parking like idiots that annoys me. Strangely the day last week the police parked and monitored things people seemed to remember how to drive and park sensibly. Only that day though

Stellaris22 · 14/03/2021 06:09

It's the parents who sit in their car with their engines idling that are the worst. Why would anyone do that outside a primary school? I've reported it to school as both myself and DD have bad asthma but they don't seem to think it's an important issue.

beyondtheshoe · 14/03/2021 08:39

The traffic doubles if not triples on rainy day. I am yet to find out what job only employ parents on rainy days as it seems the only day they need a car for essential reason Grin.

VicarofDibley · 14/03/2021 08:41

We live in a rural area if my DC"s were to walk to their secondary school it would not only take them a good probably 3 hrs and be incredibly dangerous .There is school transport but we have to pay it is very expensive and so is the public bus .Me and DH take it in turns as we both work to take and pick up .Some of us have no choice .

OverTheRubicon · 14/03/2021 08:48

@VicarofDibley

We live in a rural area if my DC"s were to walk to their secondary school it would not only take them a good probably 3 hrs and be incredibly dangerous .There is school transport but we have to pay it is very expensive and so is the public bus .Me and DH take it in turns as we both work to take and pick up .Some of us have no choice .
So clearly, this was not aimed at you. Am a bit Hmm at all the posters indignantly pointing out that they (very understandably) need to drive, when they clearly aren't the ones op is talking.about.
Whoscoatsthatjacket · 14/03/2021 08:50

I drive mine. It’s a half hour walk from my house to the kids school. At the moment they have staggered start times one had to be there 8:40 and the other 8:50... I start work at 9.
I literally drop them off and have to rush back home to start work at 9. The LA only provides a bit for those living over 3 miles away. I’d happily pay for a school bus if they supplied one.. but they don’t.

My dad lives on a road with 2 comprehensive schools on it. Traffic is a nightmare at 3:30 with all the buses and parents parking outside the house. He doesn’t mind and never complains. He just avoids leaving the house/coming home around school time. It’s not an issue.
One of the schools has a large catchment area due to the nature of it. Most kids don’t live within walking distance so there’s not a lot parents can do except pick their kids up.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 14/03/2021 08:57

If a sahp wants to drive their kids to school, that's their prerogative. A sahp time isn't public property with its best use to be determined by the general public.
Fed up of the 'lazy sahm' trope on MN.

ItsNotLoveActually · 14/03/2021 08:59

People that moan about the traffic are usually part of the traffic themselves!

Alexandernevermind · 14/03/2021 09:06

So because you don't like sitting in traffic you think everyone else should keep the road clear for you?
Can you not catch the bus, or are the busses too slow, crowded and unreliable?
Can you not cycle, or are the roads too busy and dangerous, with no cycling lanes, then once you arrive at your destination there is no where secure to leave your bike?
Can you not walk, or is too far, too slow, too wet, unsafe, or simply inconvenient?

GoldenOmber · 14/03/2021 09:11

@MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously

If a sahp wants to drive their kids to school, that's their prerogative. A sahp time isn't public property with its best use to be determined by the general public. Fed up of the 'lazy sahm' trope on MN.
Yeah, their prerogative. And it’s the prerogative of those of us walking our kids through the traffic fumes and pavement parking and dangerous driving to be somewhat Hmm about those causing it, if their only reason for driving is that they can’t be arsed with a seven-minute walk.
Iheartmysmart · 14/03/2021 09:19

DS has long since left school however when we were making our choices for secondary school there were two within a 30 minute walking distance, both with awful Ofsted reports and reputations, and one a 25 minute drive away rated as outstanding with an excellent reputation. Guess which one we chose.

beyondtheshoe · 14/03/2021 09:20

It's high time council banned all traffic (apart from residents, obviously) from blocks surrounding the schools. Even lazy parents would have to walk a street or 2 and it would become safer for everybody.

It would make it really inconvenient for anyone living too close, so just that would reduce the traffic by half at least. People who genuinely need to drive would see no difference in parking a bit further and walking 5 minutes.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 14/03/2021 09:23

You don't know what else they've got going on at home though or whether they've got a limited amount of time to do chores that they need to be child free for. Their time isn't less important than someone else's. There's nothing wrong with wanting to make their children's school day easier by stopping them from getting wet if the weather's bad or helping them get all their stuff to and from school.

HikeForward · 14/03/2021 09:26

I chose a house within 10 mins walk of a school so I could walk DD in the mornings before work. We only looked at houses within walking distance of a school.

I think it’s good for parent and kids to walk if they can, it’s a nice time to chat and look at nature, get exercise and fresh air.

It amazes me when I see neighbours driving their kids (to same school) when they work from home or are a SAHP. It must take longer to load kids into the car, de-ice it, navigate the congested roads and find a parking spot than walking!