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AIBU?

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Original poster

Son gaining weight?

35 replies

motherdearest373 · 12/03/2021 19:46

Hello Mumsnetters,

I would like some advice, guidance and help please.

My son 15, is 5ft6 not sure what he weights, but until October last year he was slim (flat tummy, lean legs etc).

He was trying on his uniform last night, as he has to go back to school next week (Year 10 in Wales) and he couldn't fasten his trousers and his shirt would not button (his tummy was in the way of it buttoning).

He came downstairs to show me and he said I'm fat aren't I?. I said no you're growing. He then ran back upstairs in a mood and was upset. He didn't speak to me for the rest of the night.

I went food shopping this morning and I asked him if he wanted to come with me. Usually he loves coming as it gets him out the house. I'm also showing him how to pick healthy food etc when out shopping.

But, as he was getting ready, he decided to wear jeans (normally he wears joggers/tracksuit bottoms) and he came running downstairs saying look mum I'm getting fat. I can't even fit into my Levi's anymore. I said please just get ready as I want to go shopping. He then said I'm starting a diet so everything fits me and stormed off upstairs. He then shouted I dont want to go shopping with you. So I went on my own.

Should I be worried about his weight?

Has anyone helped their child slim down or is it part of the growing process?

What should I do?

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 13/03/2021 11:35

Did he exercise much more lockdown? I wouldnt focus on diet as much rather than getting him active every day

Original poster
motherdearest373 · 13/03/2021 11:43

@Hankunamatata

Did he exercise much more lockdown? I wouldnt focus on diet as much rather than getting him active every day
Yes he used to cycle a lot, walk to school there and back every day. Also was out and about playing with his friends.
OP posts:
Original poster
motherdearest373 · 13/03/2021 11:48

@Notimeforaname

But he may be doing that teenager thing where he wants to keep complaining about the issue but doesn't want to do anything about it.

Its suddenly so daunting when teenagers realise all the responsibilities they have and almost revert back to children...shouting at mummy because nothing suits. Hopefully he comes round to the idea.

Yes he used to sulk and complain a lot before. Especially if he had home work, school work, told off at school, the list is endless to be honest. But as you say he never came up with any solutions as to resolve these issues and its the same with his weight now.

Obviously I want to help him. It has annoyed me that I didn't spot it sooner. I feel bad for it.

OP posts:
Hiphopopotamus · 13/03/2021 11:52

Have you posted this before? Seems very similar with the same Levi’s detail

gingercat02 · 13/03/2021 11:54

I know ds 12 has put weight on in the last year. It's inevitable really, much less exercise and more treats at home to stop us all being miserable about Covid life. I had to let the elastic out on his school trousers then he went back this week. They fitted before Christmas. He will get back to his usual size once he is back at PE, football and out with his mates I'm sure. He is also due a growth spurt

Symbion · 13/03/2021 12:08

Treading carefully with my teen too.

I think that this is not the time to worry about it. Buy him new trousers, as you say "because he is growing" and encourage him that once he is walking so much more, and being so much busier he will naturally use more calories. Advise him to just concentrate on getting back into the swing of things at school for now. Maybe a step counter - when he sees the steps he is doing it might reassure him that just going back to school will tip the calories in /calories out balance. If in a couple of months it's still a worry then he can think again.

Going back to mix with their peers must be quite intimidating when they are already self-conscious, so I think reassurance is more important than diets just right now.

Reinventinganna · 13/03/2021 12:13

Use his upset to have a conversation about healthy eating and exercise. Don’t make it about losing weight, make it about being healthy.
He’s a growing lad and it’s a great time to get healthy.

GreenBalaclava · 13/03/2021 12:30

Portion size is the key here I think. I'd just start cooking a bit less of everything for the evening meal. He's still growing, no need for a proper diet, just slightly smaller portions and more exercise and he'll outgrow it.

MizMoonshine · 13/03/2021 12:35

The greats thing is with kids that you're in charge of his diet.
Quietly cut back on the high processed foods and carbs and up his protein intake. It's super important right now because he's growing up.
Keep fruit snacks in sight all day. Ask him to go for a bike ride with you to get him out of the house instead of shopping.

Small changes can make a big difference to his weight and confidence.

Notimeforaname · 15/03/2021 20:37

Obviously I want to help him. It has annoyed me that I didn't spot it sooner. I feel bad for it

You cant be on top of everything op.
And at 15 he is capable of a little more responsibility.

But as you say above ,he does tend to be a bit of a moaning Michael in general (definitely growing into a man thereGrin)

Hope the atmosphere is a little more positive at home and I hope there's less stress.

Also ,a pp made a great point above about making the conversations about healthy eating and living,rather than 'losing weight' the end result is the same but since he is very sensitive about the topic it would be a good idea to not mention weight unless he does.

Best of luck op!

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