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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that my mum should put me above an episode of Jezza Kyle???

31 replies

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 21:32

My mum (who lives in Spain) and I have been trying to catch each other on msn over the last few days. Anyway, this morning we finally caught up with each other. Before i carry on, i should point out that i am 37 weeks pregnant. She asked how i was and i said fine, how are you and she mentioned the weather (as you do ). The next thing she says to me is "Oh sorry, gotta go, Jeremy Kyle's on in a minute. I watch it religiously!"

Now i wouldn't mind if we spoke regularly, but we dont. She doesn't ring me, which is kind of understandable as it's expensive from Spain and i dont like to ring her in the evenings because alot of the time she's pissed which makes it really difficult to have a decent conversation with her and in the daytime she's normally busy doing one thing or another (plus it's cheaper for her to ring me when she has a euro telephone card).

When i first told her i was pg, she said she would be coming over when the baby is due. She has not mentioned coming over since, nor has she even asked after my wellbeing re being pg or the baby's wellbeing, which i find quite selfish and self centered of her, even if this will be her 6th grandchild.

I spose what i'm pissed off the most about is the fact that i wanted to talk to her about whether or not she was actually coming over or had just said that at the time but has no intention of coming over now, and all she did was fob me off with Jezza fuckin' Kyle!!!!! I'm really with her for this. DP and PIL cannot understand her attitude and lack of interest.

AIBU to be very pissed off??

OP posts:
Buda · 06/11/2007 21:33

UANBU. However do you really want someone around to actually watches that rubbish?

LittleBella · 06/11/2007 21:34

I would pity her rather than be angry with her.

She's obviously very stupid. Sorry. I don't say that as an insult, my mother's stupid too and it's awful.

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 21:35

lol Buda, i watch it too if it's on and mentioned to her that it's repeated at lunchtimes, but to no avail.

TBH i'm not bothered if she comes over or not but i AM bothered that she'll cut me off so that she can watch the programme.

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Buda · 06/11/2007 21:39

My Mum is the same with Corrie, Eastenders, Emmerdale, Hollyoaks and various other crap so I know how you feel!

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 21:45

She just seems so uninterested in her old England life at the moment. She didn't even tell me she was moving house (in spain) until she'd actually moved and even then all i got was just a bloody group email!!

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Tinker · 06/11/2007 21:47

What was Jezza discussing? Can't answer without full info

NorthernLurker · 06/11/2007 21:51

Why don't you write in and see if you can go on as a guest "my mother shows no interest in me" - at least you know she'll be watching
Actually to get on it would probably need to be 'my mother shows no interest in me or my spotty boyfriend who used to go out with my best friend's sister's pizza delivery man befor he fell out over the dog''

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 21:54

LMAO NL!! That made me giggle

Hell would have to freeze over before i would go on that programme! I only watch it to be thankful for my own blissful life!

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kindersurprise · 06/11/2007 21:56

YANBU, but really you are annoyed at her disinterest not at JK.

At the end of the day, I agree with LittleBella, you should feel sorry for her. She is missing out on an important moment in her daughter's life and will not be close to her grandchild. She is missing out more than you and your lo.

Do you get on well with your PILS?

NorthernLurker · 06/11/2007 21:57

That's a relief RG - been sitting here panic stricken that you would come back and say that you DO have a spotty boyfriend and what on earth was I going to say then!
Good luck with the new baby - not long to blast off anyway

HairyIrene · 06/11/2007 21:58

yanbu tres rude too

caught a bit of it today coincidently its teh most vile ...

generations of misfits getting their 15 minutes

HairyIrene · 06/11/2007 22:01

uncle barney and bloody nora live in spain and there is big booze culture amongst expats in spain i think

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 22:02

Kinder - yes, it's nothing personal against Jezza but more that my mum would prefer to watch him than speak to her (heavily pg) daughter. I get on very well with the PILs. They are going to be fabulous grandparents (it's their first grandchild).

NL - My boyfriend isn't spotty thankfully but we do hate the pizza delivery people!

Irene - yes it was appallingly appalling today wasn't it!

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RGPargy · 06/11/2007 22:08

Irene - yeah i can deffo see that. She always seems to be in a bar somewhere!

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NorthernLurker · 06/11/2007 22:11

OK then- I will leave while the going is good

To be serious - is there any mileage in writing to say 1) that you are hurt that she doesn't seem interested in you and the baby and 2) you want her to be interested so could she please pull her socks up! Might be easier to say in a letter and it least it gives a use for the address from the circular

HairyIrene · 06/11/2007 22:16

does she speak spanish rgpargy?

last report on uncle barney was 16 stone from what i would describe as a skinny bloke...its real liver thrashing socialising thang...

kindersurprise · 06/11/2007 22:16

I do not know about the cost of phoning from Spain, but I live in Germany and I speak to my mum several times a week. And when I was pg with DD she phoned from holiday in Australia to see how I was doing. So she does not have any excuses for not getting in touch.

HairyIrene · 06/11/2007 22:18

appalling rgpargy too true
they so scare me too

RGPargy · 06/11/2007 22:19

Hmmm possibly but i'm not sure that it would actually achieve anything

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RGPargy · 06/11/2007 22:30

Kinder - i know it's cheaper with a phone card, but perhaps she is just bored of the whole "England" thing and is happier in Spain with her new life....

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NorthernLurker · 06/11/2007 23:56

Off to bed but wanted to float this - RG - if your mum turns it round when your baby is here and basically shows up ready to do whatever you need - how will you feel and want will you want to say. Horribly personal question I know - don't answer it, just wanted to suggest the possibility so you could react to it a bit - joking aside it's obvious this is very hurtful to you and I will hope for better things for you.

HairyIrene · 07/11/2007 00:14

fairy nuff northern lurker
but i think rgpargy, anyone pregnant or not would feel miffed to come second to jeremy kyle??
i mean there are some schools of thought that say a lady mmight like apampering and attention whilst pregnant
when baby comes its all about them and not you anyway ime...

NorthernLurker · 07/11/2007 00:21

A sound point HairyIrene - you are quite right. I was just wondering if the baby might be a catalyst for an improvement in the maternal attitude. Is Jeremy Kyle ever off screen does anyone know - or is he a year round affliction?

HairyIrene · 07/11/2007 00:43

he's def an affliction NL ... enflicted too often!

RGPargy · 07/11/2007 18:36

According to my TV guide, he's on THREE TIMES A DAY!!!!!!!

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