How often should I expect my DD to get ill ?

[whiteleathersofa]

My DD is 13 months. She's not at nursery.

How often would you expect her to get colds / tummy bugs etc ?

I know it probably varies, but I would love to get an understanding. How often do they get fevers ?

How often would you expect her to get ill once she goes to nursery ?

I'm quite anxious about it generally because of covid, it really stresses me out. But also just generally I hate it when she's sick. Since she was born she's had 2 - 3 episodes of a fever with no obvious symptoms and one proper snotty cold. She also sounded congested a lot as a newborn ( nasal congestion ). I just wonder what else I'm in for.

We've had a hospital stay because of one of her fevers, as they thought it could be meningitis. So that was a bit scarring for me.

Th first 6 weeks in childcare DD got constant coughs and colds but the two winters after that she got a bad cold where she needed time off nursery for a couple of days and also low level runny noses. We’ve been lucky with sickness bugs so far.
During this last/current winter she’s only had one low level runny nose and not a proper cold despite being in nursery which I suspect is due to the increased hygiene and cleaning at nursery and the fact that I’m not at work so not passing her colds either. My 12 month older has had two colds since he was born.

Thanks everyone for your experiences !

And to the poster that mentioned newborns always sound congested, I have heard this too ! So it's hard to know if she actually had a cold when she was tiny or if it was just because her nostrils were so tiny. After a while I started cleaning them of bogies ( lol sorry ) regularly with a bulb thing. Every time it sounded like she was congested, I sucked it out and she was immediately clear. I think that's probably all it was when she was a newborn, just tiny nostrils, bless her. But when she actually had a cold at around 8 months, it sounded very different.

In any case, this probably warrants a new post- but did anyone get their child vaccinated for chicken pox ? My paediatrician mentioned it might be a good idea. He says it's safe and just avoids her getting sick from it. I'll have to pay privately of course. I haven't done lots of research into it yet, but I can't help but feel like I would like to avoid her getting ill.. but I'll need to research as he did mention that some people say that it can cause you to get shingles or something like that later in life, or that you can react differently to shingles or something later on. But he said it was true and he would do it...

@Justajot ah I just read you're mentioning the chicken pox vaccine ! I may look into it indeed.

My DD also always gets bad fevers after her vaccinations, it's horrible.

Maybe she's just a child that gets fevers. I don't know, but if I can avoid the dreaded chicken pox which could make her quite poorly, then I might. ( after some research ).

I also gave her the one year vaccinations in two goes and she was pretty ill. So who knows how it would have been if I had given it all in one. She gets fevers even when they say that they shouldn't get them after certain vaccinations they're not as likely to get fevers, but she always does.

DS(2.5) picks up every cold going, always has. Even before he started nursery, he would pick up colds from every baby group we went to. He’s had a couple of episodes of bronchiolitis aged 6 months and 14 months. He’s had hand, foot and mouth too. He’s never had a tummy bug (occasionally a high temperature has made him do a single vomit).

When my dd started nursery and any new childcare or wrap around care, she'd end up with a cold, or be poorly every two weeks for a few months until (I presume) her immune system got used to the environment.

In any case, this probably warrants a new post- but did anyone get their child vaccinated for chicken pox ?
I was going to as it is quite common where I live but they both got it beforehand! No idea how as that was before they turned 1 and weren't even at nursery yet.

Some kids don't get sick often my 10yr old has never been physically sick in his life. Had a few colds though

Is she under care of a paediatrician because of her hospital stay, OP?

Fairly constant mild issues is how I would describe how often mine showed some sign of illness (at least a runny nose) when small. Vomitting bugs were worst for us, from about once a year at start fading to never by 7-8yo.

It really depends. When they start mixing with other children it’s natural they are going to be picking up bugs if all kinds. DS picked up everything at that age up until he started school but hardly ever ill now he’s older. Dd started nursery and rarely got sick. It may have helped she had an older brother so her immune sister was already prepared.

I would imagine it would be less than usual right now due to all the extra cleaning and hand washing and sanitising.

I wouldn’t panic too much op.

It's normal to not want your child to get ill but i don't think it's 'normal' to be worrying about it constantly and checking your childs forehead all the time. It sounds like you might be struggling with a bit of anxiety over this, would you consider maybe talking to somebody about it?

I don't think you can say how often a child gets ill they are all different! Obviously it's a bit more common when they first start school/nursery.

@lljkk no it isn't because her stay in hospital. I see him privately just because I want to have a doctor we know and takes his time. We have had terrible experiences with GPs when she's had other issues that she's needed to be hospitalised for, so I occasionally see this private paediatrician- as I have private medical insurance too. I do like our health visitors but it's always someone different there too. The GPs have been shocking to be honest. They have no idea what they're talking about when it comes to children ( from my experience ). Every time I've gone to them with something, they've given the wrong advice that's actually made the problem worse and ended up with my DD being hospitalised at 5 weeks old. When it could have been avoided. I was made to feel stupid and told it was all normal, when actually it really wasn't. It was quite horrific to be honest.. then I had another issue with her recently and GP told me to do something - which I did, which again just made it so much worse. I also took her in for something which I googled prior.. the GP had no idea about this other thing. I took her to the private paediatrician and he said ' yup, it's what you googled ' ' nothing to worry about '. I asked him why does the GP not know this ? And he said, sometimes they just don't know. Sorry rant over !! I hate GPs .. can you tell ??

@guiltynetter yeah it's something I do get help with, as it really affects me and I know it's not quite normal. I just always think of the worst case ! But yeah definitely getting help ( which doesn't seem to help that much haha but I'm trying ).

It really depends on the child. Mine had similar exposure to germs, time in nursery etc. One regularly got colds etc but my younger one I can only remember being poorly once and she is still much harder in terms of health than her older sister.

Another GP bashing thread

@LAgeDeRaisin oh sorry I've never seen one before. I'm new here. Just talking about my experiences. I think that's allowed ?

Yes you can have an opinion or experience but you've extrapolated that you hate all GPs because you had a couple of GPs you didn't agree with.

I think it's also unhelpful to spout off about GP's being rubbish because the vast majority of the public aren't in the privileged position to go to a private paediatrician at all let alone multiple times in 1 year every time there's a sniffle.

You'll get some GPs who aren't very experienced but the majority have a wealth of knowledge and know how to treat most childhood conditions appropriately.

I say this not as a GP but a hospital doctor who frequently deals with GPs.

For anyone concerned- GPs are not on the whole rubbish. Please go to your GP if you are concerned about your child. They are extremely unlikely to 'make it worse' or give you advice that will harm you child.

@LAgeDeRaisin yes I agree that saying ' I hate all GPs' is a total overstatement ( it was a silly thing to say and just came out as an emotional response to recounting what had happened with my daughter). Every single time I've taken her or sought advice, it was the wrong advice. But I understand it can happen and we've probably been unlucky. I would always go to the GP even now at first instance, but I'm not happy about how they've made me feel pretty stupid in the past and put my daughter at risk. Thankfully I can see the private doc sometimes and the health visitor.

But I'm not at all happy about what we've experienced. It's not good enough.

I was going to suggest you speak to your GP about your anxiety as it sounds more than most parents, then read your last post - maybe private psychologist to work through your issues before they start to affect her?
About fevers, if you’re breastfeeding I’d certainly continue while she gets settled at nursery, my DD is 20 months, nursery since 9 months and has only had a fever after jabs. It’s one thing we know has a good effect on reducing coughs, tummy upsets and fevers.

@PinkDaffodil2 ah yeah I already have a lot of support mental health wise about my anxiety problems.

Unfortunately I wasn't able to breastfeed my angel for very long. I really wanted to and really tried though, as I know it's great protection for her. Maybe that's why she's had a few things in her first year. But I really did try !

DS has only been ill to the extent that I've had to keep him home twice in his life - once with chicken pox caught at nursery and once with a sickness bug that he caught from me. He's nearly 8. He gets a mild cold usually at the start of winter. Never really had a fever.

Op, kids pick up lots of coughs and colds, they can have ear infections and sore throats, all sorts of things, thanking every day she isn’t ill and worrying to this degree and using Google to self diagnose is a downward spiral and helps neither yourself or your daughter.

You’ll project your worries into her, a friend of mine over the years has convinced herself she has illnesses so many times, had numerous tests, some quite evasive and bad mouthed medical staff along the way, her teenage son is now the same, he won’t even get in the school bus incase he picks up some sort of illness.

Your daughter is a baby, you have years and years ahead of you with her picking up illnesses, maybe nits and other delights, you need to learn to cope in a measured way, you’ll drive yourself unwell yourself otherwise.

We have had a cold every 4-6 weeks since starting nursery almost 5 months ago. Nothing else.
We vaccinated for chickenpox so that we shouldn’t have that to deal with.
She’s never had any sort of stomach bug though since birth.

She had a few fevers when she was tiny but nothing since nursery, but as they are in bubbles and with the additional cleaning I think that’s helping.

@FAQs yeah definitely I'm keen on making her anxious. I'm not just bad mouthing medical staff though. Just that we've been unlucky with GPs so far. They just didn't know stuff and they also didn't take certain things seriously enough and misdiagnosed. It happens. Doctors at hospitals have been great. So please don't assume I'm just like your friend. I also don't just google stuff to diagnose. The one time I did, I was right and it was nothing serious. I keep it measured in that regard. I'm getting help for my anxiety anyway, so I'm not irresponsible about it. I know you weren't inferring I was just like your friend, but I felt I had to explain a bit how I am.

That should have read ' I'm keen on not making her anxious '

In the 3 years of nursery and 13 years of school I can count the number of days off either of my DD's had on my fingers, plus perhaps one foot - literally a week apiece for chicken pox and a handful of odd days for illness, most years none though (you get a prize for full attendance). It really does depend on the child, but there's also some parents who keep them off at a sniffle then the likes of me (and other working mums) who have a take two paracetamol and carry on attitude. I've personally not had a day off sick since returning to work after having my kids, 16 years.