Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I fear I will never work in my profession again.

78 replies

LipstickLou · 10/03/2021 10:05

Just before covid hit I had interviewed for some senior roles in my industry. I wasn't offered any of the positions and on reviewing the new post holders I found them to be 'hipster' men at least 10 years younger than me. Covid then put us all in lockdown and all my contract work dried up.
If I approach any recruiters I am 'not a good fit'. I think my age (55) is being used against me. I work in fashion and beauty so I am frequently told I look younger.
I miss working and have a great track record of success. I have been working for a local charity but they have nothing to offer me at a senior level. They also recruit career charity professionals at director level and appear not to want transferable skills. I have been self employed and hated it. I feel on the scrap heap.

OP posts:
MarshaBradyo · 11/03/2021 09:33

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

The problem is not limited to women.

My sector is full of men in their 50s trying desperately to get work and honestly I can tell you it's because they usually ARE expensive. The reality is unless you get to a particularly high tier, 20 years experience doesnt add much more than 10, and it's often offset by less flexibility, poorer technology skills and slower ways of working. The guys in my industry can't accept that they cant command the pay they want, because the market does not need or value their experience.

Some interesting posts on here

Can I ask which sector this is?

MarshaBradyo · 11/03/2021 09:35

I don’t put my DOB

At 46 I’m pretty old for my sector but with long gaps for dc I don’t feel I’ve worked that long, about ten to fifteen years all up

But when the age is so skewed to younger it does feel more alien to be there. This is agency stuff a lot of women switch to client side as they get older

MarshaBradyo · 11/03/2021 09:38

I’m not sure it is just cost because if two people go did a job at the same salary would at what age would someone find it harder to get the job if candidates are pretty even?

MacbookHo · 11/03/2021 09:43

I have a diary of my interview exploits on my Facebook page and looking back you could write a newspaper column from them.

Have you made sure these are all invisible to strangers/employers browsing your Facebook page? Lots of employers look at social media.

But I think this is all a Sign that you should throw yourself into your Big Idea. Go for it!

Havanananana · 11/03/2021 09:59

OP - being blunt, you're not really selling yourself here. Your posts have been about why you cannot do something (age, perception, closed shop ... ) and there is little about what you actually can do. If I was reading this and happened to need to recruit someone with your experience (and there may be someone browsing MN in exactly that position) then you are not exactly leaping off the screen as being the ideal candidate.

You're probably right - you might never work for someone else in your profession for all of the reasons that you list. Too old (for products aimed at "youngsters"), too experienced and therefore a threat to younger managers, too expensive etc.

So how about a change of approach to being the Product Manager for an excellent, proven product - YOU!

Everything that you list as a negative should actually be a positive. You have x years experience in the industry. You have a PhD? You have worked in sales, marketing, research, new product development, PR, production. You've been there - done that, so you're not going to be fazed by new challenges. You presumably have a detailed knowledge of how the industry works - and probably who the major players are - so start utilising this knowledge and experience. If you cannot find a company to employ you, then you'll have to employ yourself - and you already have experience of freelance/consultancy work.

I know nothing about your industry, so I'll use a different one to illustrate the point. Imagine you had 20 years experience with "Cola Drinks Inc" - a huge multinational company where you worked in sales, marketing, product development etc. before being made redundant. Which other companies could use your knowledge?
Anyone starting up a new drinks company might need someone who knows about product development, packaging, hygiene requirements, product approval and certification, production options, marketing etc. If they want to be stocked by Tesco and Sainsbury then they need to understand how these supermarkets operate - even just how to get an appointment with a buyer. Would they be better selling through small specialist retailers, or to restaurants and hotels? What about exports ...? What about sourcing raw materials, briefing ad agencies, on-line marketing ... etc. What about finance and budgets ...

Someone with this knowledge could also advise other companies in other industry segments - the knowledge could be transferred to any company in food and drink (a fish company, sausages, gourmet soups, jam, micro-brewery beer or spirits) or any company wanting to sell retail products. Some lateral thinking can reveal many more opportunities.

As for being 55 - it's the ideal age. As an external consultant you are not a threat to the management - you should be seen as more of a sounding board for ideas or as a sparring partner.

You have a friend who is in PR - so get together and start putting together "Brand LipstickLou". Then you begin calling all of your contacts in your industry - for example there will be companies that don't want to employ a full-time person but who could really use someone for a short-term project or some expert input a couple of days a month. Read the industry trade papers and websites. Even launch yourself through those media. When things open up again, get to the industry exhibitions and trade shows.

LunaHeather · 11/03/2021 10:59

havana OP isn't trying to promote herself here, I thought she was trying to have a chat? Apologies if I'm wrong, OP.

Havanananana · 11/03/2021 11:20

@LunaHeather

I know the OP is not trying to promote herself (but this is social media, and you never know who might be reading the posts).

My post is intended as a (hopefully) helpful observation that the issues she currently says are preventing her from finding a job are actually the very things that make her such a great candidate - either as a freelance and/or part-time consultant, or even being a partner or founder of a new business.

I'm trying to point out that "I fear I will never work in my profession again" will likely be a self-fulfilling prophesy and that a change in mindset to "I have so much knowledge and experience that there must be plenty of opportunities for me in this industry" might result in a better outcome.

LipstickLou · 11/03/2021 11:38

Thank you both. I am not trying to promote myself. I wanted to find out if I was the only one feeling that my career had come to a standstill. My social media is locked down to 30 people and that is a definate due to the job roles of other family members. I have had a very successful consultancy but that has dried up due to Covid. Everything suggested as to building a business as an external expert has been utilised previously. And interestingly I have been approached after posting this thread.

OP posts:
Havanananana · 11/03/2021 12:08

@LipstickLou

Great news about the approach - and apologies if I was teaching you to suck eggs.

As this forum is also widely read, my post might be of help to anyone else in a similar situation. In case it wasn't clear, I too work as a freelance consultant - and work during the pandemic has all but dried up. There are no new products to launch, no new companies starting up, no short-term projects - everything is on hold. Some of my clients may not even be around after Covid and Br...t, but I believe that at some point things will pick up and my "job" right now is to make sure I'm best placed for this when things improve.

Mintjulia · 11/03/2021 13:07

OP don't lose heart.

I was made redundant in September. And applied for about 80 jobs since. I got through to 3rd round interviews seven times (basically down to the last two) and came second each time which has never happened before. Then I looked at the successful candidates on LinkedIn and they were all men in their 30s. I am female in my 50s which becomes clear when they check my degree. It's a matter of public record. I can't avoid it.

After 6 months struggling, I accepted that I was too old to be employed in my former role and took an admin/lower paid role. Eight hours in to new role, I was offered the last of the roles I had previously applied for.

So it is possible, it's just harder. Flowers Hang on in there

LipstickLou · 13/05/2021 07:33

Update. New job offered! Fantastic company, fantastic salary. They also know how old I am!

OP posts:
NorthernBirdAtHeart · 13/05/2021 07:58

Brilliant news, congratulations @LipstickLou !!

eurochick · 13/05/2021 08:07

What a great update!

Misty9 · 13/05/2021 08:20

Fantastic end to reading this thread Grin I was going to suggest setting yourself up as a business coach. I'm 40 and now the dc are a bit older, just starting to think about how to progress my career and 'brand me' - I'd certainly value an experienced female to guide me.

Good luck with it all

CustardyCreams · 13/05/2021 08:35

It is illegal to ask how old you are. Not to mention rude. It is illegal to ask for dates of qualifications.

The fact you probably did O levels not GCSEs ages you, so don’t mention them on your CV.

Previous posts are right: trim your CV history and exclude part of the history, or for your earlier jobs don’t mention the dates.

At interview, if you are asked about your age, laugh and say, “oh dear I hope I’m not looking older than my years! COVID must have been harder on me than I thought.” If you are pushed to answer, pull a puzzled /taken aback look and ask, “oh is there an age requirement for this job? I didn’t realise that happened any more. Can youtell me about it?” Throw it back on them. Or say, “I’m old enough to have the experience to get the job done well, and young enough to bring the energy, ideas and enthusiasm you want in your team.” Super cheesy, but might work.

You shouldn’t have to hide your age, but discrimination is rife out there, you can’t fix the world on your own.

ivegotdreadfulpmttoday · 13/05/2021 08:40

I'm finding the same thing. I'm 53 and have a great cv. Get the interview but as soon as they see an older woman they are not interested. Literally take one look at me and might as well turn off the zoom/teams straight away. It's dispiriting.

LipstickLou · 13/05/2021 08:51

They actually didn't ask how old I was or about my family. They also don't know anything about my husband or children. The headhunter is 53 and the CEO male the same age. The requirement was for extensive experience in my field. I was ready to hang up my boots and they were polite and professional. No silly questions.

OP posts:
Grimacingfrog · 13/05/2021 09:00

Congratulations. Brilliant news. My friend was recently in the same boat and got a fantastic new job, much better than previous jobs, where she's really appreciated. There's hope out there!

groovergirl · 13/05/2021 09:15

Just RTWT and I'm so thrilled for you, LipstickLou! Talk about "putting it out to the universe ..." Cosmic forces aligned in your favour!

And please do launch that product you have in mind. You never know how many millions of us might like it. And once you've made squillions you can sell your start-up to those hipster lads you talked about upthread. (Why on earth do 30yo guys want to work for cosmetics companies? And why do the companies think a dude would be a better fit than you? Unless it's for IT or deliveries or selling slap to drag queens.)

Roadtohades · 13/05/2021 09:18

Have you looked at applying for (paid) non-executive board directorships? Lots of companies are desperate to show that they they have diverse boards, as most in the commercial sector are all male, and although they are part-time appointments they are often well-paid, and two or three could give you a nice income. I have a friend who had had to give up her high-status job to look after her SEN child and she now, in her 50s, makes a reasonable income from paid board memberships. It's an area where experience of business management usually counts for much more than youthfulness.

Roadtohades · 13/05/2021 09:20

Sorry, posted before I saw you had a job offer - congratulations! But to anyone else in a similar position, it's worth looking at board positions.

imgoingtoregretthis · 13/05/2021 13:08

What about more of a heritage brand ? I've worked in "fashion" but not brands that are targeting teenagers, although I feel clothing/ footwear is quite different to makeup/ fragrance / cosmetics, unless you join somewhere that does all of them.

Anyway a number of high up women, but I still experienced a bit of get the teas in love. It's tough. I've interviewed for some senior roles and felt like because I don't kiss arse to the male boss I didnt get the roles, I think being assertive can certainly work against you. It's shit. Shall I start my own company?

LipstickLou · 13/05/2021 13:08

@groovergirl. I will launch it 2022.
Funny old world, my new boss has overcome a communication difficulty that my daughter suffers from. I once got a job for being a God botherer. I have been out jabbing up and buying Jaegar blouses (someone suggested a softer look-I do listen). Interview, I was terrified.

OP posts:
imgoingtoregretthis · 13/05/2021 13:10

Oh just seen your last post ... great news !

Purplecatshopaholic · 13/05/2021 13:41

Reading this thread and empathising. Just seen your update - such great news, all is not lost for us ladies of a certain age!