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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to be young again?

96 replies

HarryorHas · 08/03/2021 15:11

Just that really.

Life was exciting, less stressful, more fun, I looked great, felt great, had a fantastic figure...the thought of the future was so exciting,

I’m not old, old (43) but god, life was good, wasn’t t it?!

OP posts:
Sunshineonarainydayy · 08/03/2021 15:54

I'm so thankful to have had such a great time in my late teens/20s. I feel so painfully nostalgic at times because it was soooo much fun!!! Trying to channel some positivity into life after 40 rather than longing for the past but my heart does ache for it all again.

ZooeyS · 08/03/2021 15:56

It's the almost limitless possibilities, isn't it? The feeling that life was just there for the taking. It makes my heart ache too.

BLTLover · 08/03/2021 15:56

In 34 and feel like the fun is over

Hardbackwriter · 08/03/2021 15:57

I've always worked at universities and every year (except 2020...) I get a massive wave of this feeling when I see the students celebrating the end of their exams - such an intense feeling of nostalgia and sadness that I'll never be 21 again. Then I remember how much angst I had at 21 (and the fact that you have to sit those exams before you celebrate their end!) and it passes. I wouldn't swap the drama and fun of my 20s for the contented happiness I have now, but it really is a very powerful feeling, and I'm so glad I did have those carefree times. It always makes me feel a bit sad when people make very sensible decisions in their early 20s, like living at home until they have a house deposit rather than wasting the money on renting a grotty houseshare with their friends (one of mine had an actual hole in the wall that went to the outside world in the kitchen!) and I know I shouldn't because it's a very wise choice and it's a very privileged thing to be able to spend a few years being carefree and not for everyone, but it does because those years were so precious to me and life is so short.

Hardbackwriter · 08/03/2021 16:01

Incidentally my school friends and I have been exchanging messages during lockdown fantasising about a big, messy night out in some old haunts when we're allowed and they're open again and while it will clearly not happen (I mean, I have a three week old so I'm clearly kidding no one!) and would probably feel like a bit of a forced, awkward imitation if it did - oh the thought is appealing

Sunshineonarainydayy · 08/03/2021 16:04

Yes and so many crazy situations with random people, who thankfully all turned out to be good intentioned. Completely carefree, and stupid! I'm terrified for my own kids but hope I allow them the freedom when the time comes. Feel sad for the youngs ones now missing out on that carefree existence.

DisgruntledPelican · 08/03/2021 16:10

Yes, I agree. Am only 36 but I want to be ten years younger. It was so much fun, even the difficult bits.

Thehawki · 08/03/2021 16:10

Haha I suppose I’m going to be a downer here but I’m 23 and have had barely any youth at this point so I’ve given up thinking I might get a chance to be carefree or have fun. I got sick at 17 and stayed stick for 3 years, I had about a year or two where I started up my own business and worked as well on the side, business did well enough for me to quit the other job and then COVID hit Sad

Now I’ve had a year where my grandad died, my dad needed a heart operation he couldn’t get due to COVID, I somehow managed to buy a house?? And then my boyfriend went straight on furlough! My mum is moving so the base for my business is having to be rebuilt by me here. My childhood dog ( who would sit by my side when I was sick) died. I will be unemployed (by my mum lmao) within two weeks. Honestly don’t bother being young right now, you’re so much better off being established and confident and have other people take you seriously. COVID has seriously messed up a lot of what could have been made more bearable and I would even have money to spare Envy

Sorry to anyone that actually read all that, I know it’s miserable! Moral of my story is the grass is always greener but try to enjoy now if you can.

EstuaryBird · 08/03/2021 16:11

I’m 66 ☹️.
All I want in the world now is a way back to 1972 and have my 17 year old body and my 19 year old boyfriend 😊.

NeedToGetOuttaHere · 08/03/2021 16:13

I’m 52 and would be more than happy to have my 45 year old body back.

hippychick11 · 08/03/2021 16:15

I'm 38. To be honest I don't wish I was younger. I always had a lot of health problems from my 20's and I feel like it kinda made me feel old anyway. I also lost a lot of friends in the last few years including the love of my life, so I suppose it has made me appreciate things and I try to live in the now at this point. I totally understand and appreciate though posters wishing they were another age again

ilikebungalows · 08/03/2021 16:20

@EstuaryBird can I have a lift please? You can drop me off at 1976.

noeffingwayyyy · 08/03/2021 16:25

@HarryorHas I'm 48, you're spot on, my halcyon days were from about 91 - 98. The BEST times!

Bluntasduck · 08/03/2021 16:33

Fuck no, my adolescence and early twenties were horrendous. I am so much happier now

EstuaryBird · 08/03/2021 16:36

@ilikebungalows

Certainly! As soon as I find the time portal I’ll let you know 😊👍

AbsentmindedWoman · 08/03/2021 16:46

A feeling that absolutely anything is possible, and anything humdrum doesn't really matter. That's what I miss.

I miss this too. I'd go back in a heartbeat.

Holothane · 08/03/2021 16:47

No definitely not I’m happier now than I’ve ever been.

longtimemarried · 08/03/2021 16:50

I am very old and life has never been better give or take a few aches and pains.

flappityflippers1 · 08/03/2021 16:54

Christ alive no - I wouldn’t go back to my 20’s if you paid me!!!

I’m 34 now, and loving my 30’s so far!

CounsellorTroi · 08/03/2021 16:57

I'll be 60 this year and feel bloody lucky to be here. Two friends didn't make it this far.

blueshoes · 08/03/2021 16:58

40s are a difficult age because you are still casting off your youth and figuring out how middle age hangs on your shoulders.

In my 50s now and so glad I am not in my teens (exams) or twenties (junior at my job, proving myself) or thirties (promotions, young children).

I feel much more sorted and calm. Then again, I have always been a planner and it is good to see the road behind as well as the road ahead.

boredbuttercup · 08/03/2021 16:59

As someone who is 'young' now I'm thoroughly bitter about how great all your youths were. Being young now is shit.

I've lost 2 years of my uni experience to covid whilst simultaneously being villinised as the group who's fault it is that covid started spreading en mass again ~ September time.

I'm constantly called 'feckless' but the older generation for all number of things. Not getting up early enough, going to bed too late, making too much noise, daring to party whilst at uni rather than spending all my time studying, taking up space on public transport when those with 'proper jobs' need to get to work, renting a house in my uni city and 'taking it away' from a young family, spending money on travel and having a good time rather than saving for more responsible things like a house or pension. Whilst simultaneously chastised by the same people for wasting my youth as they talk about all the reckless and fun things they did at my age with rose tinted glasses.

My job prospects post covid are pretty bleak. Sure I'll hopefully be able to keep my bar job or maybe get something else minimum wage in the service industry but nothing actually challenging that utilises the skills from my degree and with any chance of career progression. The same can be said for my housing prospects. I'm not as 'feckless' with money as some would say, I do save, but realistically am I ever going to be able to afford to buy someone I actually want to live.

I'm also likely to work until I die as I can't see pensions remaining in the way they are today by the time I get anywhere near that age.

Pre pandemic there were still relatively shitty job and housing prospects for my future but Atleast I got to enjoy being young. I went out with friends, enjoyed my minimum wage job because Atleast the people I worked with were fun, got to attend university and take part in societies and events and things that happened. Now it feels like I've still got all the crap coming in my future but I don't even get to enjoy the now. And somehow plenty of people still find a way to blame us for our own situation, just look at afew of the student bashing threads or the ones that call young people entitled, not resilient, and snowflakes. I wish I could've been young 10/20 years ago. It sounded like a great time. And I'm sure the older generation have always called the young 'feckless' but Atleast before the young got to tell them to bog off and that they had their chance at being young and now it was their turn, it feels a lot like I'm not getting mine.

babbaloushka · 08/03/2021 17:01

Sometimes I think of the people I lost along the way, the ones who will be forever 17, 19 and 24 and I wonder, despite the heartache, if they might be better off.

It makes me think of the Neil Young quote: "It's better to burn out, than to fade away".

Robintakeover · 08/03/2021 17:02

If I could go back with the benefit of hindsight or the maturity of being 48 I would do something’s differently ... but then I probably wouldn’t have the family I have now - so maybe I wouldn’t .

I feel like old age is approaching now - maybe because I can see how rubbish getting old really is looking at my elderly relatives ... need to seize the day now I think - as soon as lockdowns over

Sunshineonarainydayy · 08/03/2021 17:04

"need to seize the day now I think - as soon as lockdowns over"

Absolutely!!!!!