To go to CMS about my ex husbands payments?

[LancesGold]

Husband left just over a year ago. We have two year old twins that he currently has no contact with.

When he left we agreed a child support arrangement based on what his earnings were at the time. I worked it out via the CMS calculator.

His earnings vary according to how many hours he works. However he is now usually earning around £300 a month more than when we made our original agreement. I know this because he still hasn't stopped his wages going into our joint account🙄

I'm currently job seeking but with sole care of two toddlers it's not easy! The last time I mentioned to him that he was underpaying he accused me of being greedy. This was last Autumm. Should I speak to him again regarding how much he's giving us or just go straight to CMS? Some friends and family have pretty much told me I should be grateful he even pays what he does!

Sort out his wages going into your joint account. That's weird.

Ask him and show him the figures the CMS says he should pay.

Straight to CMS. Your family and friends do not seem to have children’s best interests at heart.

Oops posted too soon. And if he refuses to pay more then go through CMS.

You shouldn't be grateful that he is supporting his own children financially. That is what he is supposed to do.

@MuddleMoo I've already told him to change his details with his payroĺl. He's just not doing it!

His passport, birth certificate etc. and quite a bit of his stuff is still here. I've asked him loads of times to come and get it.

@3peassuit It's not really that. More that he's so useless that they are amazed he's paying anything!

I always think CMS is the way to go in these cases, or in all cases where there's a split. It removes some of the emotion I think and makes in clear of the bare minimum that should be paid. While CMS isn't always fair (reduced payments if he has more children) I think it's a start. Also, if he's not even willing to discuss it then I'd have no qualms about going through CMS and I wouldn't take the risk of returning to your current system.

@Northofsomewhere He has no other chikdren. I sometimes think that even if CMS said he had to pay less I'd be happier. At least a third party would have decided.

@LancesGold

Can you take your name off the joint account? (After checking you are done with it?) Might be best to get legal advice first in case it affects the divorce in some way.

[quote LancesGold]@Northofsomewhere He has no other chikdren. I sometimes think that even if CMS said he had to pay less I'd be happier. At least a third party would have decided.[/quote]
Yeah that makes sense. It removes his "you're demanding too much" arguement

@MuddleMoo I'm looking into it but it's a pain in the arse to do. I've got no money going into it now. In a way I quite like the fact his money is going in. I can see what he's earning and how much I'm getting short changed!

You're in a really good position here as his salary is being paid into the joint account. Make copies of wage slips, bank statements, any savings, financial records & make a claim to CMS. Don't tell him anything, just do it before he changes everything.

You could just take the additional out of the joint account!

@Wishitsnows He takes the money out the second it goes in!

Take all wages out. He will soon change bank accounts

@Hankunamatata Believe me I'm tempted.

When he left he waited until payday and took ALL his wages. Left me with £130 in bank apart from the DC payment

He thinks you’re being greedy when he pays less than CMS minimum and does zero parenting?! What an absolute dickhead, useless excuse for a father. Go through CMS, he should be thoroughly ashamed of himself.

Could you set up a DD to take the money out?

@Naunet I won't let him see DC. I have very good reasons to believe they aren't safe with him. I told him he can go through a contact centre but he's never bothered.

He's not ashamed of himself in the slightest. Just thinks he's the injured party

@AnotherKrampus The trouble is his salary varies month to month. So although he is underpaying, the amount varies.
It's not a lot of money. Generally between £30-50 a month. It just pisses me off that it will probably be getting spent on fags etc. and not the DC.

Cms. And email his work.... Tell them to change the payments.

I would remove as much contact as you can.

He has left you with twins... no contact.. though sounds more complex than he doesn't want to..Take the emotion out of the situation..and go the cms route.

I also would be very careful about the joint account in the case of been finacially linked with DH.. I know I was advised at one point to write to credit complanies to state we were now seperate finiancially but in terms of benefit fruad investigations.

I would also return any post return to sender.

You need his name removed from the account if its yours, or set up your own account and remove your name from the joint one. You can't stop him using an account with his name on it.

OP - if you are in receipt of any benefits at all that are means tested, it is problematic that he is putting money into an account you have access to. You need to get your own account and have a hold put on the joint one to protect yourself from problems with benefit fraud. Do not leave it.