To ask what you'd do regarding wedding

[Diddledumpling22]

September wedding planned. Very small, family only ceremony - max 20 people. But due to have another 80 arriving for the evening.

We have decided to go ahead but I'm so unsure what the etiquette would be if numbers are reduced again. Do I invite the full amount of people? If numbers get restricted do I have to then inform those who will be scratched off the list?!

For this reason I'm delaying ordering and sending invites but then I'm worried that I won't be giving people enough notice especially those who might need overnight accommodation.

Agghhhh is anyone else struggling and how are you managing it?

Would you feel more relaxed if you scrapped the larger reception and only had the wedding with your 20 guests?

You haven't said if you have to confirm (and pay for 80) guests or if there is any concern there. Assuming no, I would just be honest with your 80 guests:

• We plan to hold the reception (restrictions permitting)

• But if restrictions are in place, regrettably we won't be able to invite you celebrate with us

• we understand therefore that based on the above, some of you might need to RSVP no if it involves travel etc

FWIW I would have absolutely no issue at all being told I'm on the 'potentially scratched off list' ! It's just how it is at the moment, people will understand as long as you do, too.

Congrats on your engagement, hope you have a wonderful wedding!

We will be paying extra for venue hire and food for the evening guests but if this isn't able to go ahead due to covid then we won't be expected to pay for that.

It's just very hard trying to plan for something that may not be able to go ahead. Regardless we will be getting married.

Just be honest with them - everyone knows that restrictions have changed, sometimes with no warning. A family member is hopefully getting married in October, and we've changed our hotel booking 3 times, and tbh I won't be absolutely sure we are going until the day - but no worries we completely understand that at this point they intend to get married even if its just their parents.
So I'd invite everyone, say you completely understand if they can't commit as you can't either, and plan like it will all happen